Preventing Conception

[sixpence]

I have no idea where this topic belongs, feel free to move it.

Ok, so it is my understanding that Church accepts NFP as an appropriate way to limit conception within a marriage.  I also understand that preventing conception by physically putting up a barrier or by hormonal methods is not acceptable.  I am having a very difficult time understanding WHY it is ok to try to prevent spermatozoa from meeting an egg by not letting them get to each other using NFP.  It is said that NFP is "more open" to life, which it might be in terms of the mindset of the couple, but nevertheless, the goal seems to clearly be to prevent conception.  Can anyone explain this a little better?

[Nihil Obstat]

Have you ever read or listened to the excellent Dr. Janet Smith's talk "Contraception: Why Not?"?

[Archaeology cat]

God made a woman have cyclic fertility instead of being fertile at all times. He also made various signs of when we are fertile, and these signs re pretty easy to observe (for example, Dr Billings found that aboriginal women were already teaching their daughters about cervical mucus; my husband can definitely her the changes in my voice at the different times of my cycle). NFP, then, is about recognizing those signs so we know what our bodies are doing. We can, with good reason, choose to use tht knowledge to postpone pregnancy by abstaining, but we can't use that knowledge to then decide to use a barrier or spermicide during that fertile time. Nothing is done to alter the actual sex act or its outcome, but the couple instead choose to abstain completely.

[MissyP89]

A very simple and brief explanation as I see it:

 

There is a huge difference morally between choosing to let your body do what it's going to do and forcing it to do what you want.

 

The problem isn't that we're preventing conception. It's about taking our fertility and trying to turn it into something else.

 

We're allowed to decide when is and isn't a good time for a baby. But we're not allowed to take sex and reduce it down to something that removes the possibility for life.

 

 

[Gabriela]

Have you ever read or listened to the excellent Dr. Janet Smith's talk "Contraception: Why Not?"?

 

EXCELLENT talk! She is brilliant!

my husband can definitely her the changes in my voice at the different times of my cycle

 

Umm... I thought I knew a lot about NFP and natural cycles, but this is totally new to me. What in the world are you talking about?!

[MissyP89]

Afterthought: if abstinence to prevent conception wasn't moral, then having sex when a woman isn't ovulating wouldn't be moral, either.

[Gabriela]

Having used various methods of contraception in the past, had enormous problems with all of them, learned NFP, and then not married the guy I was supposed to marry, I can say that I think NFP is the way to go—not just for Catholics, but for EVERYONE.

 

If you read about it online, though, you'll find quite a few Catholics who argue that NFP is not to be used as a form of contraception. It's not really clear what they mean by that. It sounds like they're saying it's not to be used to prevent pregnancy. But then, I can't imagine what in the world you would use it for, if not that. These people often come off as rather holier-than-thou. I call them "the NFP Nazis". Which is probably uncharitable. :-P I just don't understand them.

Afterthought: if abstinence to prevent conception wasn't moral, then having sex when a woman isn't ovulating wouldn't be moral, either.

 

I don't know that this follows. I see your point, but there would be a difference: Even though the woman isn't ovulating, God could intervene to cause conception. In the case of abstinence, however, the two people have taken the choice into their own hands and closed off divine intervention (I mean, God COULD still cause the pregnancy, but I'm pretty sure He reserved that particular miracle for Mary!). I'm not saying that's a problem (I'm not an NFP Nazi ;-). I'm just saying I think there is a difference.

[Archaeology cat]

EXCELLENT talk! She is brilliant!

Umm... I thought I knew a lot about NFP and natural cycles, but this is totally new to me. What in the world are you talking about?!

A woman's voice gets higher during her fertile time. http://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2008/10/081027175249.htm
Not everyone notices it or realises that's why her voice is higher at certain times. My husband, being musically inclined, definitely hears it and comments on it. And he knows that whether he looks at my chart or not. Edited January 12, 2013 by Archaeology cat

[carmenchristi]

A woman's voice gets higher during her fertile time. http://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2008/10/081027175249.htm
Not everyone notices it or realises that's why her voice is higher at certain times. My husband, being musically inclined, definitely hears it and comments on it. And he knows that whether he looks at my chart or not.

I didn't know that was actually a scientific fact, but I did notice that sometimes I can sing a high B-C and other times have trouble with a G.... And it seemed that this had something to do with what time of the month it was.... Interesting.

[Papist]

With NFP you are not tampering with your body. It is simply learning your body's fertility, as God made you. Artificial birth control is tampering with your body by suspressing how your body works as God made it, making your actions contray to God's will.  That said, when practicing NFP a couple is still required to postpone pregnancy for valid reason(s).

[Basilisa Marie]

That singing thing makes so much sense now.  I also noticed that when I had my wisdom teeth out, it took much longer for my mouth to clot than what my dentist said. Then I found out that it was due to where I was in my cycle at the time.  *the more you know*  

Like Papist said, we still need serious reasons to practice NFP.  Some couples feel called to not use any method of regulating births (which is fine!), while others might have a whole list of serious reasons (also fine!).  It seems like the important thing is for couples to discuss it with each other, always bring their concerns to God in prayer, and have good spiritual direction.  While there are general guidelines as to what serious reasons are, figuring out how they apply to one's particular situation takes a lot of prayer and personal honesty.  It's totally possible to use NFP with the exact same mindset as the pill, which is not okay.  

[Nihil Obstat]

Whatever you do, do not look for direction from the infamous Winnipeg Statement. :|

[Norseman82]

I have no idea where this topic belongs, feel free to move it.

Ok, so it is my understanding that Church accepts NFP as an appropriate way to limit conception within a marriage.  I also understand that preventing conception by physically putting up a barrier or by hormonal methods is not acceptable.  I am having a very difficult time understanding WHY it is ok to try to prevent spermatozoa from meeting an egg by not letting them get to each other using NFP.  It is said that NFP is "more open" to life, which it might be in terms of the mindset of the couple, but nevertheless, the goal seems to clearly be to prevent conception.  Can anyone explain this a little better?

 

I think the best reply regarding whether NFP use is sinful was a response given on Catholic Answers forum:

 

 

 

Originally Posted by XXXXXXX 
It bothers me to see how people don't think stopping sex during fertile periods isn't birth control, and birth control is sinful.

 

Stopping sex? Do you mean abstinence? Abstinence is sinful? When you are fertile, are you having sex 24 hours a day? Twice a day? Every day? At least once during the fertile period? What is the minimum required? Do you see how ridiculous this gets?
                                                                                                                                                                                                                      

Edited January 13, 2013 by Norseman82

[xTrishaxLynnx]

Having used various methods of contraception in the past, had enormous problems with all of them, learned NFP, and then not married the guy I was supposed to marry, I can say that I think NFP is the way to go—not just for Catholics, but for EVERYONE.

 

If you read about it online, though, you'll find quite a few Catholics who argue that NFP is not to be used as a form of contraception. It's not really clear what they mean by that. It sounds like they're saying it's not to be used to prevent pregnancy. But then, I can't imagine what in the world you would use it for, if not that. These people often come off as rather holier-than-thou. I call them "the NFP Nazis". Which is probably uncharitable. :-P I just don't understand them.

 

NFP can also be used to TRY to conceive, so I think what those people are probably saying is we should only use it to learn when we are most fertile and use that knowledge to try to conceive, but as pointed out by several other people here, it's not sinful to abstain during those times for the purpose of preventing conception for a number of reasons.

Just a thought... shouldn't this be in the Raising Small Humans board?

[Basilisa Marie]

Well, sixpence did say that she wasn't sure where to put it, and for a mod to move it if necessary.  I dunno, I don't think anything has been said that would need to be for adults only (yet).