Byzantine Posted November 22, 2012 Share Posted November 22, 2012 (edited) I've got a single mother and 15-year-old sister with autism. Currently I commute to college, about 50 minutes either way. My mom wants me to go to Austria for study abroad during fall of my junior year (I'm a freshman now). I really want to move on campus next year. I don't want to be the man of the house... Should I feel guilty about this? Edited November 22, 2012 by Byzantine Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PhuturePriest Posted November 22, 2012 Share Posted November 22, 2012 How many children does your mother have? If she has four children under the age of ten I might think not moving onto campus is a good idea, but generally I don't think you should feel guilty at all! Is your mother okay with you moving on campus? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PadrePioOfPietrelcino Posted November 22, 2012 Share Posted November 22, 2012 I'm confused a little how does study abroad in two years connect with moving on campus next year? With that said Austria is farther away than college, if your mother is ok with Austria I would think she would be ok with moving on campus. All thing considered (didn't give us too much). I don't think there is inherently anything to feel guilt about. If you want to move on campus ect to run away from family ties or such then PERHAPS there might be something there, but again still not inherently. In many of these situations of life it seems that INTENT is the most important thing to consider. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Byzantine Posted November 22, 2012 Author Share Posted November 22, 2012 (edited) [quote name='FuturePriest387' timestamp='1353554895' post='2514646'] How many children does your mother have? If she has four children under the age of ten I might think not moving onto campus is a good idea, but generally I don't think you should feel guilty at all! Is your mother okay with you moving on campus? [/quote] We're the only two kids. My mom doesn't like the idea but doesn't seem entirely opposed to it. [quote name='PadrePioOfPietrelcino' timestamp='1353555261' post='2514649'] I'm confused a little how does study abroad in two years connect with moving on campus next year? With that said Austria is farther away than college, if your mother is ok with Austria I would think she would be ok with moving on campus. All thing considered (didn't give us too much). I don't think there is inherently anything to feel guilt about. If you want to move on campus ect to run away from family ties or such then PERHAPS there might be something there, but again still not inherently. In many of these situations of life it seems that INTENT is the most important thing to consider. [/quote] Moving on campus next year when I could still be home for weekends could theoretically make it easier when I go to Austria. And yeah, I'd sort of like to get away from family ties. Not like never see them again, but still, I'd like to not have to act man of the house. Avoid family gatherings I really don't want to go to, see what it's like to live with other males, that sort of thing... Edited November 22, 2012 by Byzantine Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PadrePioOfPietrelcino Posted November 22, 2012 Share Posted November 22, 2012 Then I still don't think you should feel guilty...the experiences you mentioned are good for men to experience. But again Intent is the biggest factor that only you can know. I would suggest if you have continual misgivings talk with you Pastor, Spiritual Director or any oth Priest you might connect with well. I am assuming that you have already been praying for guidance in accordance with God's will. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Basilisa Marie Posted November 22, 2012 Share Posted November 22, 2012 (edited) You don't have to feel guilty. Most kids go through the same thing around this age, even if they aren't going to college. Living on campus is an experience you can't get anywhere else, and I feel it's an important one. You get the opportunity to learn all sorts of things you might not if you still lived at home with your parents. It's a really good growing experience for lots of people. Living with roommates, resolving disputes with friends, getting exposed to all sorts of lifestyles and ideologies and habits, figuring out a schedule YOU want to live on, etc. It's like the rubber meeting the road with all the "training" you got growing up, but you're still in a safe environment where you can try new things and make mistakes (switch roommates, etc). If you can financially afford it, I'd say go for it. Where in Austria? I love that country. Edited November 22, 2012 by Basilisa Marie Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Byzantine Posted November 22, 2012 Author Share Posted November 22, 2012 Thanks everyone! [quote name='Basilisa Marie' timestamp='1353602836' post='2514779'] Where in Austria? I love that country. [/quote] The FUS campus in Gaming. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ed Normile Posted November 22, 2012 Share Posted November 22, 2012 Is your autistic sister hard for your mother to take care of ? Will your sister miss you ? ed Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Byzantine Posted November 22, 2012 Author Share Posted November 22, 2012 [quote name='Ed Normile' timestamp='1353612383' post='2514843'] Is your autistic sister hard for your mother to take care of ? Will your sister miss you ? [/quote] Hard to take care of? Depends what you mean. Not violent or anything like that. Pretty high-functioning. She'd probably miss me, but as I said my mom wants me to study abroad and at least with this we could sort of ease into it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PhuturePriest Posted November 22, 2012 Share Posted November 22, 2012 [quote name='Byzantine' timestamp='1353613249' post='2514846'] Hard to take care of? Depends what you mean. Not violent or anything like that. Pretty high-functioning. She'd probably miss me, but as I said my mom wants me to study abroad and at least with this we could sort of ease into it. [/quote] Psychologically, it would be easier for sister and mother if you moved on campus first. Then at least you could still visit on the weekends and they could visit you. If you didn't do that and just went to Austria, it would be a very difficult thing for everyone to cope with because you wouldn't even be able to visit each other. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NonNovi Posted November 22, 2012 Share Posted November 22, 2012 Austria is amesome And Gaming is only half an hour away from where my community is, you will be closer to them than I am Anyway, I think it's a good idea to live on campus first to let your mother and sister get used to the idea of you being away. Just talk about it already, so they can get used to the idea of you living on campus first. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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