Can I Have A Discernment Thread?

[Byzantine]

If so, here are my recent thoughts:[list]
[*]I'll probably enter seminary soon after college. I've even added a philosophy major.
[*]If I were being called to marriage [i]and[/i] Orders, how likely is it that the draw towards marriage would be prevalent, not the one to Orders?
[*]Marriage would set ordination day back probably at least eight years. The seminary requires that married men studying for the diaconate be married for at least 8 years before ordination. I doubt that requirement would be relaxed for men studying for priesthood (for those of you just joining us, married priesthood is a legitimate possibility for Byzantine Catholics).
[*]It seems like my archeparchy should really use a young priest.
[*]Entering seminary at age 21 (ordination or at least graduation projected at roughly age 25) could make me just the young priest we could use.
[*]Without my mommy, I would probably revert to a lifestyle best enmemed by Foul Bachelor Frog - Catholic Edition. Somehow I don't think my wife would appreciate that.
[*]I'm having trouble being at my own family's gatherings. I somehow think that I wouldn't be too fond of her family's gatherings either. Then again, that could be my cross.
[/list]
Input?

[Spem in alium]

Pray. Gain experience and knowledge. Listen out for God.

I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers, Byz.

[PadrePioOfPietrelcino]

Do you go to a Catholic College? The reason I ask is that your philosophy work might not transfer to the Seminary, and even if it is a Catholic College it still might not transfer. It might be a more financially prudent step to NOT major in philosophy, but maybe just take a few courses to satisfy curiosity. Have you talked with your Priest about discernment? Since most of us are Roman Rite we do not have as muchI exposure to young men discerning the possibility of living both vocations so with that in mind here are a few of my other thoughts. The married Priesthood in the Eastern Rites is a beautiful thing when lived well. While it is true that a priest may be married a Bishop can not, so true discernment of the priestly vocation in my opinion should be your first focus. The second focus might be should you be a married priest. Of course if you are already in a committed relationship then it would make sense to first discern if this is the person to marry or not. I'm sure I have done nothing more than just ramble and confuse more

[Byzantine]

[quote name='Spem in alium' timestamp='1352600057' post='2507961']
Pray. Gain experience and knowledge. Listen out for God.

I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers, Byz.
[/quote]

Thanks!

[quote name='PadrePioOfPietrelcino' timestamp='1352600715' post='2507966']
Do you go to a Catholic College? The reason I ask is that your philosophy work might not transfer to the Seminary, and even if it is a Catholic College it still might not transfer. It might be a more financially prudent step to NOT major in philosophy, but maybe just take a few courses to satisfy curiosity. Have you talked with your Priest about discernment? Since most of us are Roman Rite we do not have as muchI exposure to young men discerning the possibility of living both vocations so with that in mind here are a few of my other thoughts. The married Priesthood in the Eastern Rites is a beautiful thing when lived well. While it is true that a priest may be married a Bishop can not, so true discernment of the priestly vocation in my opinion should be your first focus. The second focus might be should you be a married priest. Of course if you are already in a committed relationship then it would make sense to first discern if this is the person to marry or not. I'm sure I have done nothing more than just ramble and confuse more
[/quote]

College = Franciscan; my seminary doesn't offer philosophy so I would assume transfer is go. Tbh, I'm not sure how much experience my priest has with this, seeing as married priests are sort of in the process of being restored after a rather long (at least in my opinion) absence. I figured that the same discernment rules used for deacons might at least provide guidance here. And no, I don't think I'm more confused. Thanks!

[organwerke]

I don't know how old are you.
I would ask: are you in a relationship? (it seems to me that you are not).
In case you aren't I would ask: are you comfortable with your celibate status?
Do you feel very strong the need to have a person to live with?
Do you see more pros or versus about the married status? (for example you talk about parents-in-law, but think also of children, of the necessity to provide them care, education, food etc.)
Do you think your vocation is more focused on living for God alone or in sharing your life with someone?
These are some of my suggestions...

[TheresaThoma]

So some questions I have for you/stuff to think about (don't feel like you have to answer them)
Are you in a committed relationship right now or do you see that as a very real possibility in the near future? If so I would discuss this with your girlfriend, this decision will affect her as well.
See if you can find a married Byzantine priest to discuss this with, they are out there I know of at least one in my diocese. He will probably have some insights for discerning both matrimony and Holy Orders
Prayers for you.

[Lumiere]

[quote name='Byzantine' timestamp='1352598992' post='2507955'][list]
[*]I'm having trouble being at my own family's gatherings. I somehow think that I wouldn't be too fond of her family's gatherings either. Then again, that could be my cross.
[/list]
Input?
[/quote]

Family gatherings don't begin to get important until you have your own children. I would say having difficulties with family gatherings is normal for your age.

[Byzantine]

[quote name='organwerke' timestamp='1352671295' post='2508216']
I don't know how old are you.
I would ask: are you in a relationship? (it seems to me that you are not).
In case you aren't I would ask: are you comfortable with your celibate status?
Do you feel very strong the need to have a person to live with?
Do you see more pros or versus about the married status? (for example you talk about parents-in-law, but think also of children, of the necessity to provide them care, education, food etc.)
Do you think your vocation is more focused on living for God alone or in sharing your life with someone?
These are some of my suggestions...
[/quote]

Age 18
No girlfriend now, nor in the past (excluding, you know, first grade-type-things)
Comfortable with celibate status more or less, but can depend on time of day (generally cooler with it in the morning and evening than towards the middle of the day)
Need a person to live with? Somehow I feel like [b]for me[/b] that could be as easily solved by some monks as by a wife.
Okay, so yeah, children... Lots would be nice. But then there's the thing of raising them. That's kinda scary. Okay, maybe really scary.
Uh, as for that last one, I don't really know...

[quote name='TheresaThoma' timestamp='1352673437' post='2508231']
So some questions I have for you/stuff to think about (don't feel like you have to answer them)
Are you in a committed relationship right now or do you see that as a very real possibility in the near future? If so I would discuss this with your girlfriend, this decision will affect her as well.
See if you can find a married Byzantine priest to discuss this with, they are out there I know of at least one in my diocese. He will probably have some insights for discerning both matrimony and Holy Orders
Prayers for you.
[/quote]


Committed relationship no, possibility for one in near future seems to be diminishing, and it's kind of a relief. But yeah, I had assumed that this discussion would probably have to come up pretty early.
There aren't really any married ByzCath priests in my area, at least none that I'd feel comfortable talking to.
Thanks for prayers!

[quote name='Lumiere' timestamp='1352676020' post='2508246']
Family gatherings don't begin to get important until you have your own children. I would say having difficulties with family gatherings is normal for your age.
[/quote]

Thing is, I used to really love family gatherings. But lately they've come to be like a weight on me. Shouldn't the reverse be happening to me at this point?

[organwerke]

Ok this is my personal opinion.
I'm not an expert about married priests but I personally find that being a married priest can be really more complicated than being an unmarried one.
If you don't find a wife that shares 100% with you your vocation, you can live conflicts about what comes first in your life (suppose you have to raise your children but at the same time your parishioneers need you, you've to say mass and your children want you are with them and so on...).
So honestly if I were you I'd think: if I am sure I want to be a priest it is better not to get married. If I am sure I want to get married it is better I don't become a priest. If I would choose both options I would be probably very streesed and would do something wrong in both vocations.
This is of course what I would think if I were you...but I'm not!