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CatherineM

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Thought I'd update again since I'm not around as much as I used to be. You know how it is when a Phatmasser has a baby, except my new babies are of the 6'+ tall variety.

Zack is still plugging away at school. He has good days and bad. It's the equivalent of him being in second grade experience wise so it's almost like he needs recess now and then. His mom took him out in first grade when they wanted him tested for ADHD. The whole family is bipolar, including his deceased mom, but she never wanted to take her meds and didn't want any of her kids medicated either.

We found a newspaper article from 10 years ago where she picketed the school board because the school wanted oldest son on meds. The school counsellor was quoted as saying without them she was afraid the kid would get on drugs or get in trouble with the law when older because he was so out of control. Mom took him out of school instead and started homeschooling the bunch after that. That kid is now the one who is wanted by the police for major drug trafficking. Counsellor definitely called that one. Today she wouldn't be allowed to say that publicly.

Zack takes his meds religiously. He knows that not being on them resulted in his brush with the law, and probably also contributed to his mom's death. She was just so out of control the last few years. She used to fake her death all the time, pretending to collapse and weird stuff like that, to where when she really had the attack, at first they thought she was faking again. Only when she started choking and not breathing did they call an ambulance. Mental illness can kill you in lots of different ways. Austin has a friend dying of cancer right now because he was too paranoid to have a spot on his face looked at, and it was cancer that has eaten half his face now. Can you imagine trying to convince someone afraid the government is going to implant tracking devices in them to have an angio to have a stent implanted in their heart to save their lives?

Anyway, baby steps. We've spent the last two days at first aid training. It's required for us to take to have James with us. I was pretty worried about Zack when we started the CPR part. I thought it might give him flashbacks to his mom's death. He toughed it out though. He said that he lost his first mom because he didn't know what to do, but he wasn't going to lose his second one the same way. He really did a lot of Why God stuff after his mom died but a couple of weeks ago he said that he is going to have a better life with us than he would have if his mom had lived. He didn't want her to die obviously, but maybe this is why God took her, so he'd better make the most of it.

We are going to file papers to adopt him the day he turns 18. If we wait until then, it will be completely his choice, and we won't have to track his dad down for consent. Hopefully it will avoid family drama too. He can't wait to be shed of his last name. It is like carrying the name Hitler around here. People hear it and automatically expect the worst.

His dad wouldn't be hard to find though. He's moved into the old house a block away. Since the mom died, the one decent sister got married and moved out. The other sister got pregnant but aborted because she didn't want to stop partying. The house is falling apart. The roof is half covered in plastic sheeting, a wonderful roofing choice in a place where it gets to -40 in winter. The property is worth something because we are close to downtown. The bank offered to give them enough money so that all the kids would clear about $20,000 each. We were having a pool as to which one would spend it first. I picked the brother with the $200/day OxyContin habit who likes prostitutes.

Anyway, the dad said he would move in to fix it up to make them more money to sell it to someone other than the bank. The bank is buying up the old houses on this block for a company that puts up high rise condos. Actually the dad is getting kicked out of the homeless shelter because he keeps getting caught doing drugs in the clean living apartment they let him have. The other two brothers who are wanted by the police are moving in to help him renovate. The only renovating I can see them doing is if they turn it into a grow-op.

Christmas is going to be brutal. All of them stuck in that falling down house, doing drugs, and the anniversary of the mom's death. We are getting the boys out of the area and away from the drama for Christmas. Christmas is hard on James too. We just found out that he also has brothers and sisters that don't want anything to do with him because he's retarded. He was put into state custody by his mom when he was 12, saying she wanted no contact. Honestly, some people should just not be allowed to have kids.

My other two guys are also fine. Both snoring at the moment. The four legged one curled up in my lap. Good thing I've got a wide lap since this lap dog weighs 60 pounds. The financial planning for the disabled book is doing well. We also just sold 3000 thriving with schizophrenia books to a drug company that wants to give them out as swag to psychiatrists. Good thing too, because teenagers are sure expensive.

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Oh, and when I wondered out loud why the dad hadn't moved in before now, since he technically owns the place since the mom never formally divorced him, I was informed that he couldn't until the older sister who got married moved out. Apparently he had done some hard prison time 20 years ago for raping her, and it might have been awkward. She's the stablest one of the bunch because she had court ordered therapy before the mom could regain custody.

This is also the sister who accidentally had a child with a half brother she never knew about. The baby came down with a rare leuchemia at 6 months old and when testing for bone marrow matches, they discovered it. Then the Dad mentions he had an affair with the kid's dad's mom. Zack apparently has a total of 19 half brothers and sisters. At his mom's funeral, our pastor said she put the fun in dysfunctional. Boy, he wasn't kidding. They should have had their own reality show.

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Couldn't have put it better, Jaime!!!!

Wow, Catherine, Just came on here because a friend and I were praying Evening Prayer (yeah, I know, we're late, but it's 5pm somewhere.....) and we look for stuff to pray for.

You guys just moved into first place (bumped out the Giants!)... love to see a post from you, 'cause you're always good for a target for prayers.....

I'm so glad Zack found you.... and I am so glad he knows how vital the meds are...

Even before you said what you did about the upcoming holidays, when I read what you said about Zack and the CPR... I found myself thinking, that is an INCREDIBLY healthy response for someone looking at a 1 year anniversary on Dec 25... Yes, the pain doesn't go away... but a healthy person will find ways of moving forward somewhere near one year.... his is a very healthy response.....

My friend T and I have been praying REGULARLY for both of you... and we aren't gonna stop. So There!!!!!!!

[i](If somebody put Zack's family into a book, no one would believe it....)[/i]

[i]There's just one problem... and it is a WONDERFUL problem . . . . [/i]
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[color=#FF0000][i]. . . ZACK IS NO LONGER IN THAT FAMILY. HE'S NOW IN YOURS.[/i][/color]


How is school going for you?

And can you give us any more of an update on James? Is he working or going to school?

We want to know so we can focus prayers for you... but only what you feel free to share, OK?

So glad you have the other 2 snorrers around too..... give them all something special to eat tomorrow, ok?

Get some good sleep, mom....

Edited by AnneLine
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James works at a big grocery store. He pushes the carts in and helps people out with their stuff. He's really good at it. Most of the rest of the time he's either watching chipmunks movies or playing video games with Zack and his buddies. He's also very interested in Yellowstone's super volcano. He runs scenarios about how long before the ash cloud would reach us and stuff like that. He has trouble remembering to plug in his cell phone but has jailbroken all the playstations for Zack's friends. I don't even know what that means or why you would do it. He's kind of like Rainman.

He was attacked by a dog as a kid, so we were worried he might have trouble with Gandy the basset hound. Instead, he has really bonded with him. He called us in a panic that Gandy's dog door got blocked by a TV tray that had tipped over. He was upset because the dog was upset that he couldn't go outside. I thought someone was gushing blood or something.

My class is fine. It is strange doing online stuff rather than in class, but much easier on my back. We are watching a film series right now about the African graveyard they found in New York City.

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He's a jailbreaker? That's amesome. There's a little money in that kind of work too, if you can develop that skill for other devices. With Microsoft's push to move to UEFI coming around shortly he could have a decent time of it. Good for him! :)

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Thanks for the updates/info about James and yourself.

I have had the same experience with on-line classes... works, and is easier on the bod, but sure feels odd....

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  • 2 weeks later...

Well, we spent yesterday trying to help another young man with PDD. He was a crack baby and is a lifelong friend of Zach's. When he was 12, his mom picked up a loser boyfriend. The boyfriend molested his two little sisters. The mom blamed the kid instead of her meal ticket scumbag boyfriend. The kid ended up in a group home where he's been getting beaten up. His social worker was supposed to get him signed up for disability benefits before he turned 18 so he wouldn't have an interruption of benefits. He was supposed to go to the transition group home that James just came out of.

Instead because she had him labeled as a pedophile, she didn't bother. He ended up homeless when he turned 18, and moved in with his grandmother who has dementia. He came to us yesterday with only 4 days of meds left. It takes about a year to get disability benefits. Austin turned loose the dogs on the paperwork. Looks like he may be moving in with Zach eventually. Austin has approached the older couple across the hall who own a 3 bedroom unit. They are in China right now and spend at least 6 months a year there since they retired. They may be willing to sell to us. If this keeps up, we will definitely need the space.

Holy cow.

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Catherine, I dunno... God seems to have BIG PLANS for you.... Have you ever heard of the DeBolt Family???

From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

Who Are the DeBolts? And Where Did They Get Nineteen Kids? [url="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:Poster_of_the_film_Who_Are_the_DeBolts.jpg"][img]http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/thumb/f/f0/Poster_of_the_film_Who_Are_the_DeBolts.jpg/220px-Poster_of_the_film_Who_Are_the_DeBolts.jpg[/img][/url] Directed by [url="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/John_Korty"]John Korty[/url] Produced by John Korty Written by [url="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Janet_Peoples"]Janet Peoples[/url] Narrated by [url="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Henry_Winkler"]Henry Winkler[/url] Cinematography Jon Else Editing by David Webb Peoples Release date(s) December 5, 1977 (1977-12-05) Running time 72 minutes Country United States Language English
[i][b]Who Are the DeBolts? And Where Did They Get Nineteen Kids?[/b][/i] is a 1977 [url="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Documentary_film"]documentary film[/url] about Dorothy and Bob DeBolt, an American couple who have [url="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Adoption"]adopted[/url] 14 children, some of whom are severely disabled war orphans (in addition to raising Dorothy's five biological children and Bob's biological daughter). [url="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/VHS"]VHS[/url] and [url="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/DVD"]DVD[/url] releases use the shortened title [i][b]Who Are the DeBolts?[/b][/i]...


[url="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Who_Are_the_DeBolts%3F_And_Where_Did_They_Get_Nineteen_Kids%3F"]http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Who_Are_the_DeBolts%3F_And_Where_Did_They_Get_Nineteen_Kids%3F[/url]

And the AASK ([i]Adopt A Special Kid) [/i]website:

[url="http://www.aask.org/"]http://www.aask.org/[/url]

From the LA Times: [i]Adoptive DeBolts : Life Is Quieter Without Patter of 40 Little Feet[/i]

[url="http://articles.latimes.com/1988-09-14/local/me-1737_1_bob-debolt"]http://articles.latimes.com/1988-09-14/local/me-1737_1_bob-debolt[/url]

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Could be. It doesn't help that two of them are 6'5" and one is 6'3". Two are still growing. Zach was 6' tall and about 120 lbs when we got him. He's fast approaching 6'6" and close to 190 lbs now. People are starting to wonder if I'm feeding him nuclear waste. All his brothers are about 5'8".

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