Frustrated

[FutureCarmeliteClaire]

I am running on very little sleep. I think that's mainly why I feel so bad. I am frustrated with people right now, and honestly don't want to talk to people, even some good friends. Wherever I go, whenever I see someone I sort of know, someone asks me about my illness. That isn't who I am. I am not 4 days in the hospital. I am not an upcoming surgery. I am not an update email. A lot of people around me took interest in me when something went wrong, but when everything's fine, it doesn't matter. I know people are worried and care and whatever, but it kind of hurts how people I don't even know are all of a sudden, "So glad to see me." or "love" me. Because they don't. Because I didn't die, all of a sudden I am important, and if nothing had gone wrong, I'd be that same girl I was before. A lot of these are people at Church, and I am there a good amount of time, so this is particularly bothering me right now.

I'm guessing this is my lack of sleep. I have a bad feeling this week is going to be horrid. I'm going to try and look brightly. But, I have an appointment with my surgeon on Wednesday, and have a bunch of questions. Plus, I have four more shows next weekend.

Just need prayers. Pretty peeved right now.