" Dating & Chastity"

[arfink]

I dunno about safe for work, because IDK how strict a fiddler they make you use.

Nothing graphic tho...

[MissyP89]

I'll wait. *rimshot*

[Papist]

[quote name='MissyP89' timestamp='1349804564' post='2491688']
Is this safe for work? I want to read it!
[/quote]
Yes. The article is written by a priest.

[BG45]

Good article, Fr. Morrow gave the keynote speech on courtship and chastity at the last Ave Maria Singles Retreat.

[tinytherese]

[quote name='MissyP89' timestamp='1349804564' post='2491688']
Is this safe for work? I want to read it!
[/quote]

I find it hilarious when fiddlers are super strict like that. My university had one that wouldn't even allow me to pull up Jason Evert's website.

[tinytherese]

[quote name='Hasan' timestamp='1349762206' post='2491570']
Nobody here is focusing on the really important topic here. I kissed a girl. And I liked it. The taste of her cherry chap-stick I kissed a girl, just to try it, hope my boyfriend won't mind it. To paraphrase our greatest living philosopher.
[/quote]

I met a girl in college who honestly thought that The Jonas Brothers came up with and sung that song. That was hilarious.

[4588686]

[quote name='tinytherese' timestamp='1349850932' post='2491874']
I met a girl in college who honestly thought that The Jonas Brothers came up with and sung that song. That was hilarious.
[/quote]


I think she had some thoughts on them as well.

[url="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tWbLkXhGEmo"]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tWbLkXhGEmo[/url]









[color=#ff0000][size=8]LANGUAGE![/size][/color]

[ContemporaryCaflicCrusader]

People that know me say I'm allergic to hugging. I must have a lot of emational scarring that needs to be peeled off my soul. Good article.

[MissyP89]

Is there anyone else here that felt weird reading this?

I think Father is on the right track in pointing out that a lot of young people don't know the first thing about being chaste. His advice was sound, and I have to admit, so were his tips.

But here's the thing.

So often, it seems to me that anything chastity-related is directed exclusively at youth (high school and younger), and is composed of these broad, sweeping statements about lust and a lack of control. In my opinion, attitudes like that do a great disservice to the mature, well-grounded kids that are working hard to do the right thing for the right reason.

I don't believe it's possible to make black and white statements about chastity in courtship. Of course, it goes without saying that sex and other acts that lead to orgasm are always sinful outside of marriage. But with everything else, not all people are the same. Not all couples are the same.

I think Father knows that. But it seems to me no one is willing to say it for fear of giving young people an excuse to do things their hearts and bodies aren't prepared to handle.

This is something I've thought about for a long time. So many chastity speakers and writers say "xyz is never OK," but there is a true spectrum to sexual morality. So much nuance goes into it that I feel is just ignored because it's easier and "safer" to generalize.

Just my thoughts.

[PhuturePriest]

[quote name='Papist' timestamp='1349808867' post='2491700']
Yes. The article is written by a priest.
[/quote]

I wouldn't hold your breath. Just because something is written by a Priest it doesn't mean it is not really graphic. Theology of the Body was written by the Pope and that is probably the most graphic Religious article written.

[arfink]

[quote name='MissyP89' timestamp='1349928439' post='2492205']
Is there anyone else here that felt weird reading this?

I think Father is on the right track in pointing out that a lot of young people don't know the first thing about being chaste. His advice was sound, and I have to admit, so were his tips.

But here's the thing.

So often, it seems to me that anything chastity-related is directed exclusively at youth (high school and younger), and is composed of these broad, sweeping statements about lust and a lack of control. In my opinion, attitudes like that do a great disservice to the mature, well-grounded kids that are working hard to do the right thing for the right reason.

I don't believe it's possible to make black and white statements about chastity in courtship. Of course, it goes without saying that sex and other acts that lead to orgasm are always sinful outside of marriage. But with everything else, not all people are the same. Not all couples are the same.

I think Father knows that. But it seems to me no one is willing to say it for fear of giving young people an excuse to do things their hearts and bodies aren't prepared to handle.

This is something I've thought about for a long time. So many chastity speakers and writers say "xyz is never OK," but there is a true spectrum to sexual morality. So much nuance goes into it that I feel is just ignored because it's easier and "safer" to generalize.

Just my thoughts.
[/quote]

This. Epic win.

[Papist]

[quote name='FuturePriest387' timestamp='1349928866' post='2492207']

I wouldn't hold your breath. Just because something is written by a Priest it doesn't mean it is not really graphic. Theology of the Body was written by the Pope and that is probably the most graphic Religious article written.
[/quote]
Depends on you definition of graphic.

[Papist]

[quote name='MissyP89' timestamp='1349928439' post='2492205']
Is there anyone else here that felt weird reading this?

I think Father is on the right track in pointing out that a lot of young people don't know the first thing about being chaste. His advice was sound, and I have to admit, so were his tips.

But here's the thing.

So often, it seems to me that anything chastity-related is directed exclusively at youth (high school and younger), and is composed of these broad, sweeping statements about lust and a lack of control. In my opinion, attitudes like that do a great disservice to the mature, well-grounded kids that are working hard to do the right thing for the right reason.

I don't believe it's possible to make black and white statements about chastity in courtship. Of course, it goes without saying that sex and other acts that lead to orgasm are always sinful outside of marriage. But with everything else, not all people are the same. Not all couples are the same.

I think Father knows that. But it seems to me no one is willing to say it for fear of giving young people an excuse to do things their hearts and bodies aren't prepared to handle.

This is something I've thought about for a long time. So many chastity speakers and writers say "xyz is never OK," but there is a true spectrum to sexual morality. So much nuance goes into it that I feel is just ignored because it's easier and "safer" to generalize.

Just my thoughts.
[/quote]
I think the target is usually youth is b/c they are just at the very early stages of dating/courting/etc. The old saying, get'm while they're young. And they are forced to hear, via school, retreat, etc.

The mature adults already know everything, right? I doubt it. But if we consistently speak to the youth then some day the mature adults would have heard via when they were teens. I for one wish I heard this stuff when I was a youth. Don't know the effect it would of have but at least I would have it in mind as I get more "involved" with girls.

Also, I believe kissing is used as the signature example b/c ALL do it and believe it no big deal...and it is the springboard to the pool of sex.

Edited October 11, 2012 by Papist

[Maggyie]

I think the focus is on youth because, unfortunately, chastity programs are often just meant to be anti-teen pregnancy programs. I had a Protestant friend explain this to me once. She was very big into chastity programs and against "comprehensive" (ahem condoms) sex ed. But the abstinence message didn't apply to her any longer, because as she pointed out, "I'm 25."

Meh.

[tinytherese]

[quote name='Maggie' timestamp='1349996309' post='2492492']
I think the focus is on youth because, unfortunately, chastity programs are often just meant to be anti-teen pregnancy programs. I had a Protestant friend explain this to me once. She was very big into chastity programs and against "comprehensive" (ahem condoms) sex ed. But the abstinence message didn't apply to her any longer, because as she pointed out, "I'm 25."

Meh.
[/quote]

I know what you mean. Women who are done with school and have careers can't pregnant too right?

Sadly, it can be harder to have opportunities with adults where they'll hear this information. With youngsters you've got convenient opportunities like school, ccd, Confirmation class, and youth group to talk to. Unless you get adults into RCIA or attract them to coming to some other form of adult formation in the faith, they probably won't hear about this until they do marriage preparation. Maybe you can talk to them about these issues when they're kids are doing sacramental preparation or religious ed though.