Advice Or Prayers, I Guess.

[arfink]

Do it!

[AnneLine]

Pack your bags... God is calling you to be a pilgrim and move to the next sanctuary!!!!

[LittleWaySoul]

Congrats, Spem!! The new roommate sounds perfect! I'll be praying for you!

Edited September 7, 2012 by LittleWaySoul

[Spem in alium]

Thank you, everyone! Our answers to the questions were basically the same. Among other things, she doesn't want a roommate who smokes, she needs quietness to study, and she wants her roommate to be friends with her! The only thing that could let me down is that she wants an extrovert for a roommate, because she's shy and wants help to make friends. Even though I'm an introvert, I love to get involved in things. So perhaps we would be a good fit

I will pray myself. Ultimately, the Lord leads and I follow.

Edited September 7, 2012 by Spem in alium

[AnneLine]

My bet is that 2 introverts working together can light up a small city.....

Edited September 7, 2012 by AnneLine

[MissScripture]

Yay for options. My mom was glad to hear you are able to move. And maybe thank your current roomie for being considerate before you leave, so she doesn't feel like she pushed you out?

[Spem in alium]

[quote name='MissScripture' timestamp='1347061104' post='2480080']
Yay for options. My mom was glad to hear you are able to move. And maybe thank your current roomie for being considerate before you leave, so she doesn't feel like she pushed you out?
[/quote]

Many thanks to her! I'm glad too Of course. She's been really kind to me (even to the point of apologising for not being around; I think she understands that I'm quiet and different from the other girls) so I would like to let her know of that.

Edited September 8, 2012 by Spem in alium

[Spem in alium]

UPDATE: The College made a mistake - the girl they selected for me who seemed like a great match already has a roommate. They are trying to look around for another place for me.

Things haven't really improved much. I feel really shy and inferior around these girls. My roommate's really the only one who tries to include me - she asked me if I wanted to watch TV with them, asked me if I wanted to come for dinner and made sure I wasn't alone. I tried making conversation with the girl who's been cold and short with me, but it didn't go very far. She basically acts like I don't exist, even though we have a class together.

Don't really know what to do anymore. Feel like croutons.

[AnneLine]

That's too bad about the 1st roommate option, but keep on with the RA people... you are entitled to have them work to resolve this problem. YOU ARE PAYING THEM, remember?

Prayers, Spem.....

[Lil Red]

you shouldn't feel like croutons for that girl acting like a 3rd grader (though that might be an insult to some 3rd graders). Don't let her treat you like croutons. Stand up to her and ask her what her problem is.

[Spem in alium]

[quote name='AnneLine' timestamp='1347403072' post='2481480']
That's too bad about the 1st roommate option, but keep on with the RA people... you are entitled to have them work to resolve this problem. YOU ARE PAYING THEM, remember?

Prayers, Spem.....
[/quote]

I know, I hope and pray that everything works out. The RAs and RD are all really lovely, and I really feel like they care.
I spoke to my mother this morning for the first time in a while, and I told her about the problems I'm having. At first, her response was kind of like, "But Spem, you're only there for four months. Deal with it!", but then she gave me some advice and told me she understood. I've faced the challenges so far, and sometimes I wonder if I should just deal with all that's happening. And then things get harder again.

Today I joined a few clubs, which should hopefully fill up more of my time. And I'm part of the Crew Team, which means 5:30AM starts (and VERY sore legs). I find that getting involved has helped in a few ways - I'm not only out of the room and meeting new people, but I'm spending less time worrying about stuff or being depressed and homesick while I'm being active.

And thank you for your prayers, they really mean a lot to me.

[quote name='Lil Red' timestamp='1347403671' post='2481482']
you shouldn't feel like croutons for that girl acting like a 3rd grader (though that might be an insult to some 3rd graders). Don't let her treat you like croutons. Stand up to her and ask her what her problem is.
[/quote]

I know I should talk to her, but I'm so nervous and I really don't like confrontation. And that's not much of an excuse, I know, but it's really what's stopping me. I try to be kind, and I'm still hoping that she will at least say hello to me...

I should say the Rosary more regularly, but the other week I was feeling so low that I prayed one and said a decade for my roommates. The one who's been difficult to be around wasn't home, but that night all the others were really kind to me...perhaps Our Blessed Mother had something to do with it? I've been asking her, St. Joseph and St. Mary Mackillop to protect and guide me, and so far I can feel them, but some days I just lose hope.

Thanks, Red. You've been really helpful with this, even if I'm too weak to do what you suggest.

[Lil Red]

it's not weakness....and I understand not liking confrontation (I mean, I hate it, and I like to keep the peace, if you know what I mean - defense mechanism being the youngest of 10). but there comes a point where realizing that getting mad about the way someone is treating you is not un-Christian....it's NOT okay for someone to deliberately snub you with no rational reason, and it's OKAY to ask/confront someone why they are treating you in such a hurtful manner.

[Lil Red]

[quote name='Spem in alium' timestamp='1347408019' post='2481494']
Today I joined a few clubs, which should hopefully fill up more of my time. And I'm part of the Crew Team, which means 5:30AM starts (and VERY sore legs). I find that getting involved has helped in a few ways - I'm not only out of the room and meeting new people, but I'm spending less time worrying about stuff or being depressed and homesick while I'm being active.
[/quote]

and this is amesome! and will definitely help with self-confidence.

[Spem in alium]

[quote name='Lil Red' timestamp='1347408686' post='2481497']
it's not weakness....and I understand not liking confrontation (I mean, I hate it, and I like to keep the peace, if you know what I mean - defense mechanism being the youngest of 10). but there comes a point where realizing that getting mad about the way someone is treating you is not un-Christian....it's NOT okay for someone to deliberately snub you with no rational reason, and it's OKAY to ask/confront someone why they are treating you in such a hurtful manner.
[/quote]

I get what you mean. If I were to talk to her, what would be the best way of going about it? In the past when I've needed to confront people, I've done an awful job because I've had no idea what to say. And I don't want to start an argument.

[quote name='Lil Red' timestamp='1347409046' post='2481498']
and this is amesome! and will definitely help with self-confidence.
[/quote]

Thank you! Yeah, today at Crew we had to run laps, and I realised that it's really all about mentality. I thought I was going to have to stop running because my body was so sore, but I kind of pushed myself on mentally - and I made it! Plus the people there are very considerate of my total lack of rowing knowledge

[MissScripture]

Will she talk to you at ALL? I mean, if you approached her and asked if you had offended her in some way would she respond or is she completely ignoring you, and pretending you don't exist at all?

And if you need a break from it, seriously, give my parents a call. They would be more than willing to let you spend the night again or something. (Although, now that I say that, I think this weekend, they might have guys from the NET team staying there one night, so you couldn't that night... LOL)