Anastasia13 Posted September 4, 2012 Share Posted September 4, 2012 How much did/do you discuss your dating life with your parents? I'm particular interested in the answers of those who lived with parents while out of school. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Groo the Wanderer Posted September 4, 2012 Share Posted September 4, 2012 Not at all. this is part of the problem with 'dating'. Secrecy, opportunity for sin, setting oneself up for a series of failed relationships. If you are truly chase in your relationships and truly want what is best for yourself and the other, then there is no reason not to be open and forthcoming with your parents, your friends, and others. We try to hide what we are ashamed of. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BG45 Posted September 4, 2012 Share Posted September 4, 2012 In my last relationship, I didn't let my mom know for about a year and dad I didn't for two of the three years we were dating. Mainly because I knew he'd find a way to ruin things if he could. That said, if you're in a relationship and can't be honest about that if asked, it's not a relationship worth keeping and I wish I had been more open with my parents. In the current "are we dating or are we not", I went to visit her in Philly and she's coming in two weeks to visit me. Mom's known from the start and I'll be telling dad on Thursday; I don't want to repeat the mistakes of the past. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Adrestia Posted September 4, 2012 Share Posted September 4, 2012 I don't live with my parents, but I do let them know who is in my life. My parents like knowing all about my friends - even those who are just friends. All of my friends like my parents, so it makes it easy. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rachael Posted September 4, 2012 Share Posted September 4, 2012 my mom knew everything Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CatherineM Posted September 4, 2012 Share Posted September 4, 2012 I didn't discuss my husband with my mom at all. Partially because I wasn't really communicating well with her at the time. I also knew from experience that telling her stuff would cause trouble. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MissyP89 Posted September 4, 2012 Share Posted September 4, 2012 Honesty, honesty, honesty. I was not open with my parents in a previous relationship and paid dearly for it -- nice guy, but the whole situation looked sketchy to them because of how little I shared. This time, my mother knew about an hour after we got together. Generally speaking, it's good to seek their blessing. They might not say yes, and as an adult you still have the freedom to be with the person. But knowing they approve saves a serious uphill battle. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Basilisa Marie Posted September 4, 2012 Share Posted September 4, 2012 I've got a solid relationship with my parents, so I bring up stuff about who I'm dating because it's just another part of what's going on in my life. I don't share the gory details, but you want to be a good ambassador for your potential boyfriend to them. If you eventually get married to the person you're dating, you want to lay a good foundation so that your future spouse can have a good relationship with your in-laws. Sometimes I'd ask my mom for advice is something was was really bothering me. But generally I'd let them know if I was dating someone new, what he was like, when we started going steady, etc. Like others have said, if you can't be open (without oversharing) about who you're dating with your parents, that probably means that there's something wrong with either your relationship with your parents or your relationship with your date. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Anomaly Posted September 5, 2012 Share Posted September 5, 2012 (edited) I kept it secret until it was time to get fitted for tuxes, bridesmaids dresses, and write the check for an open bar. They had thought I had a night job. My motto is "What they don't know won't hurt you". My wife thought I was an orphaned war refugee. Boy was my future FIL raging when the first hundred people on the list were my family. Three words. Ironclad Marriage Contract. My in laws still consult a lawyer before accepting an invitation to come over for dinner. Sucker! Edited September 5, 2012 by Anomaly Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Anastasia13 Posted September 5, 2012 Author Share Posted September 5, 2012 So when you talk to them about your dating life, they know about every first date and whether it went well or not? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
inunionwithrome Posted September 5, 2012 Share Posted September 5, 2012 I was not allowed to date until I was 16. That being said, I was allowed to have "on-campus" dating at 15. My parents knew who my beaus were (both friends before boyfriend) and where we were going and when we wood be back. After school, I continued to date one of those guys. The knew about almost everything and for the most part there were no keeping of secrets. So, if there is something you don't want to share ask them not to keep forcing the issue, but tell them politely that you will communicate with them when the timing is right. Hoep I could help! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
4588686 Posted September 5, 2012 Share Posted September 5, 2012 [quote name='Groo the Wanderer' timestamp='1346755753' post='2478225'] Not at all. this is part of the problem with 'dating'. Secrecy, opportunity for sin, setting oneself up for a series of failed relationships. If you are truly chase in your relationships and truly want what is best for yourself and the other, then there is no reason not to be open and forthcoming with your parents, your friends, and others. We try to hide what we are ashamed of. [/quote] So you are in favor of sacramentally married couples copulating in public. Interesting Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BG45 Posted September 5, 2012 Share Posted September 5, 2012 [quote name='Light and Truth' timestamp='1346821142' post='2478650'] So when you talk to them about your dating life, they know about every first date and whether it went well or not? [/quote] Not necessarily everything; here was the night I called home after spending a day in Philly. "Was everything okay?" "Yeah we went to Mass and a few museums." "Did you enjoy yourself?" "Oh definitely, she might be coming to the book sale!" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Anastasia13 Posted September 5, 2012 Author Share Posted September 5, 2012 [quote name='inunionwithrome' timestamp='1346869988' post='2478829'] I was not allowed to date until I was 16. That being said, I was allowed to have "on-campus" dating at 15. My parents knew who my beaus were (both friends before boyfriend) and where we were going and when we wood be back. After school, I continued to date one of those guys. The knew about almost everything and for the most part there were no keeping of secrets. So, if there is something you don't want to share ask them not to keep forcing the issue, but tell them politely that you will communicate with them when the timing is right. Hoep I could help! [/quote] How do I keep my parents from making a big deal about a first date when I still have not figured out if there will be a second date? Just short and sweet answers? (When they knew about a first date I had earlier, so did someone else from them... ) And if not talking about my dating life with my parents sets me up for failure, why not have others who are older and more experience whom I can talk with or still more experienced and wise friends whose brain I can pick about things? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
inunionwithrome Posted September 6, 2012 Share Posted September 6, 2012 [quote name='Light and Truth' timestamp='1346876492' post='2478910'] How do I keep my parents from making a big deal about a first date when I still have not figured out if there will be a second date? Just short and sweet answers? (When they knew about a first date I had earlier, so did someone else from them... ) And if not talking about my dating life with my parents sets me up for failure, why not have others who are older and more experience whom I can talk with or still more experienced and wise friends whose brain I can pick about things? [/quote] All Very good questions. My next advice to you would to go to your priest and talk to him about this. You do not need to make an appointment persay, but go to the Confessional and just ask your priest about what he thinks about your situation. Many a priest dated before they felt God's calling to the religious life. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Create an account or sign in to comment
You need to be a member in order to leave a comment
Create an account
Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!
Register a new accountSign in
Already have an account? Sign in here.
Sign In Now