Mrs. Bro. Adam Posted May 19, 2004 Share Posted May 19, 2004 Bro. Adam writes: [quote]Why is it so hard to tell your non-Catholic Christian friends about becoming Catholic? I've been trying to tell a friend for weeks now, and I haven't been able to bring myself to tell him. [/quote] What do you think? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
homeschoolmom Posted May 19, 2004 Share Posted May 19, 2004 Um... maybe you feel like you're betraying him-- especially if he's been involved in your spiritual growth. Maybe you realize you are breaking communion with someone (everyone)? Maybe you fear he'll have a question or concern about the Church that you aren't prepared for? these were the thing that haunted my mind.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
homeschoolmom Posted May 19, 2004 Share Posted May 19, 2004 Also, if your friend rejects the Catholic Church, maybe you're afraid he'll reject you, too. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sojourner Posted May 19, 2004 Share Posted May 19, 2004 I have a couple of good friends I haven't told yet, one because I just haven't seen her and would prefer telling her in person to telling her via phone or e-mail, the other I haven't told because she's expressed a high degree of anti-Catholic sentiment and I just don't want to have to deal with it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brother Adam Posted May 20, 2004 Share Posted May 20, 2004 Wow, homeschoolmom nailed that one!!! It's true, I'm afraid I'm betraying him, I'm afraid he'll be too smart for me and I'll just end up looking foolish and stupid... And I'm afraid he will turn his back and stop talking to me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
homeschoolmom Posted May 20, 2004 Share Posted May 20, 2004 Remember that for 500 years as people returned to the Church, people have all felt like this. You aren't the first and hopefully you won't be the last (gosh, wouldn't that be weird if you were, in fact, the last person the join the Catholic Church?) Those of us who take our faith seriously and come from a strong faith support system are all going to feel this way. When I was in the depths of feeling this way, someone told me from her experience that the worst was actually over. Deciding to reconcile was harder (for her). I still think that telling people is harder... they're both hard. Remember, though, that you are not alone. And what a blessing that you and Teresa are on the same page. Can you imagine the anguish you'd suffer if you weren't? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
homeschoolmom Posted May 20, 2004 Share Posted May 20, 2004 I just realized that today is the first anniversary of the day that RussianGirl told us she was going to reconcile. What a horrible day that was. I've been on both sides of this. You're friend will come around. If he stops talking to you, he wasn't really your friend. The knowledge of that is sometimes pretty painful... (at the least, he should want to talk you out of it!) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brother Adam Posted May 20, 2004 Share Posted May 20, 2004 True, I guess what scares me the most is that I went from being Lutheran to Baptist (through this person) and now I'm going from Baptist to Catholic (yikes), and that he will be able to make such a strong sounding case that what I'm doing is wrong... I know I shouldn't be worried, but having been through a "denominational conversion" before, it worries me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dUSt Posted May 20, 2004 Share Posted May 20, 2004 I'm sure that if you make him understand that your conversion is a path that leads you peronally closer to Christ, he shouldn't have a problem with it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Crusader_4 Posted May 21, 2004 Share Posted May 21, 2004 It can be tough though i have been dreading going back to my elementary school (mennonite) and when they ask me how my religious life is doing. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mickey's_Girl Posted May 21, 2004 Share Posted May 21, 2004 When I imagine the scenario (and I'm not even close to converting), I see people just FREAKING OUT ("You're going to Hell!") and then I try to calm them down, and it just goes badly. A worst-case scenario, of course. But I tend to dramatize these things. ;-) MG Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
homeschoolmom Posted May 21, 2004 Share Posted May 21, 2004 I suggested to HS_Dad that we just pack up everything and start over in Indiana... He said no. Okay, we didn't really have that conversation (well... sort of...), but we did joke about it. Nope, God has much to teach us through maintaining our friendships... ...and He has a lot to teach our friends, too. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mickey's_Girl Posted May 21, 2004 Share Posted May 21, 2004 Indiana rules! Too bad you aren't moving! MG Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ellenita Posted May 22, 2004 Share Posted May 22, 2004 Bro Adam, imagine, you're quite possibly going to be the first step [i]he[/i] takes on his journey 'coming home'! You might not see him travel all the way because it's possible he will choose to 'lose contact' with you for a while, and sadly we have no control over that, but your conversion is a powerful witness and you will without doubt have an impact. You are also a really strong and clear debater of church doctrine - you have no need to fear about that! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sojourner Posted May 22, 2004 Share Posted May 22, 2004 [quote name='Mickey's_Girl' date='May 20 2004, 11:29 PM'] When I imagine the scenario (and I'm not even close to converting), I see people just FREAKING OUT ("You're going to Hell!") and then I try to calm them down, and it just goes badly. A worst-case scenario, of course. But I tend to dramatize these things. ;-) MG [/quote] Most people don't "freak out," they just get really concerned about the state of your soul, which is almost worse. I mean, if people freak out you can just write them off as being looney, but if they're concerned about the state of your soul, and you'd trusted their judgement up until then, it really exacerbates any doubts you already have. For example, one of my closest friends told me that through my conversion, I was deliberately distancing myself from God. This really put me into a tailspin, because not only did she withdraw her support from me at that point, but she also told me she felt I was actually taking steps backwards in my faith. Quite demoralizing. MG, I think it's valuable to visualize what it'd be like to tell people. That visualization is a way we prepare ourselves mentally and emotionally for big change, and can serve an important purpose. Just be careful that in the visualization, you don't allow yourself to fall victim to fear of what people's reactions might be. At some point, it doesn't matter how people react, all that matters is that you are being obedient to what you know to be the call of God in your life. In the long run, it's more important that you be in communion with God than in full communion with close friends or even family. Some verses that became really important to me are from Mark 13:11-13 (NIV). Jesus speaking: "Whenever you are arrested and brought to trial, do not worry beforehand about what to say. Just say whatever is given you at the time, for it is not you speaking, but the Holy Spirit. Brother will betray brother to death, and a father his child. Children will rebel against their parents and have them put to death. All men will hate you because of me, but he who stands firm to the end will be saved." You are ever in my prayers, dear friend. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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