Fcc's Update Thread

[the171]

Ok. Claire is very sick. She texted me and told me to post for her. She has Pagdet Schroeder Syndrome. She has been admitted to the hospital. There is also a blood clot in her arm. Please pray y'all. She is very sick.

[missionseeker]

Oh no!

But I am glad to hear she has found a doctor who could give a diagnosis.

[arfink]

Many prayers for her, as always.

[MIKolbe]

Many, many prayers

[MissyP89]

Claire...you are brave. Love you, little sister.

[FutureCarmeliteClaire]

Just a bit about how I am.

A friend of mine asked me today, "Why are you so happy? I'm confused." I'm happy because I'm fully submerged in God because that's the only place where I can be truly happy, especially in suffering. I'm still alive, and if I'm alive, there's a reason. I don't know what that reason is, and I don't know why I'm still alive. But every minute I have left is a minute in which souls can be saved. Isn't that what I've always wanted to do? I've waited my whole life to save souls. But I didn't have to! "There are many ways to be a servant of God."

I have had a lot go on these past five months. They have easily been the hardest in my life. There have been many days where I cried myself to sleep and days when I didn't know how I was going to do it. I know that there will be more. It's scary when you don't know what's wrong and you know you won't be better tomorrow or the next day or next week. But there is hope. I want people to know that there's hope even when there's no way out. God is my hope. Because I KNOW, no matter what happens I will always have God.

I've learned that it's okay to be mad at God. He's a big boy. It's not His fault, but still. We don't know why bad things happen to people. I don't know if I ever will, but I'm not going to spend the rest of my life asking why.

I don't know how long this will last. I don't know how long I'll be at the hospital. I don't know what's coming next. But I know that "If God is for us, who can be against us?" If He wants it, I want it too.

[Nihil Obstat]

Have you been anointed already, or are you considering it for the immediate future?

[FutureCarmeliteClaire]

Considering it for the immediate future. I may push for it tomorrow depending on how things go.

[Nihil Obstat]

Based on how happily resigned to God's will you seem to be, I am sure that you will gain enormous merit in your faithful reception of the sacrament of the sick.

[AnneLine]

Absolutely holding you in prayer, Claire.

Definitely request anointing - it is for HEALING and for the graces and strength to go through sickness and treatment.

It is an incredible sacrament, and I am surprised no one suggested this before now!!!

Thanks for keeping us advised, and let your family know we are praying for them, too!

[FutureCarmeliteClaire]

I wish I had been able to get on here on Thursday when I came home to let you all know what's going on.

I have an appointment with the doctor who's doing my surgery on October 17th. Surgery will be some time in November.

I am so glad that they found the clots in time, because[i] [/i]I would have died. Especially since I already had the pulmonary embolism...

So, I think on Monday, I went into peace and submerged in God mode because I automatically protected myself from the complete hysteria. Tuesday and Wednesday were a bit of heck. Tuesday was just awful. I had to give myself my injection for the first time. It was very hard. My aunt and cousin were visiting when that happened. Afterwards, I got up, unhooked myself from the machines, locked myself in the bathroom, and cried. I was fine the rest of the day. I had no idea when I was coming home, that was the worst. Wednesday was hard, but I knew I was coming home that night or the next day. It was the next day, which was fine. I have never been more thankful in my life.

Yes, I'm angry that someone's negligence almost killed me. Yes, this is going to forever impact my life, but guess what? This has made me stronger, and able to understand pain better. Physical, emotional, and spiritual. I've figured out who Claire really is, and that I am worth loving not because of my future or what I put up as my identity, but because I'm Claire. I have a choice. I can forgive and live my life as a survivor or hide away and never know.

I learned that crying and showing your emotion doesn't make you weak. It's built me up. It's made me a strong tower. Those nights crying made me whole. As I write this, I remember in July, I called the171 at 11:30pm, in complete despair. I remember hearing that voice through the phone whispering, "He's going to use this. I don't know how, but He will make you a strong tower. Things happen in our lives and we don't know why, but God will take this and make it beautiful." He did, He really did. I found out what people cared about me, and who I was.

This isn't over. Yeah, I'm going to be angry and frustrated and hurting. Yeah, I am going to carry this with me. But it doesn't have to be the bad stuff. Scars tell stories. Beautiful ones and ugly ones. Mine tell both. Mine tells the story of friendship, love, hope, and complete grace.

By the grace of God I am alive. Now, not a day will go by where I will take that for granted. I am alive. There is a reason.

[b] [size=4]"Even if the healing doesn't come, and life falls apart, and dreams are still undone, You are God, You are good, forever faithful One, even if the healing doesn't come." ~ Kutless [/size][/b]

May God reward you.
~CLAIRE

Edited September 30, 2012 by FutureCarmeliteClaire

[4588686]

[quote name='MIkolbe' timestamp='1344884380' post='2467047']
FWIW, I have issues with really bad and frequent headaches...so they did an MRI of my brain. They found nothing.

get it.. they found nothing!!




(hope that brought a smile to your face, FCC)
[/quote]


The thought of you in pain certainly brought a smile to my face

[4588686]

[quote name='CatherineM' timestamp='1348397388' post='2485648']
One of my favorite baseball players, David Cone, had TOS. It happens to a lot of baseball pitchers. I have Sciatica because of my back injury. Only [s]old ladies get that.[/s]​ feisty cougars.
[/quote]


Fxd

[MissyP89]

I just want to point out that the above post from Claire got props from Hasan.

That says something.

Edited September 30, 2012 by MissyP89

[MissScripture]

[quote name='FutureCarmeliteClaire' timestamp='1348972484' post='2488284']
I wish I had been able to get on here on Thursday when I came home to let you all know what's going on.

I have an appointment with the doctor who's doing my surgery on October 17th. Surgery will be some time in November.

I am so glad that they found the clots in time, because[i] [/i]I would have died. Especially since I already had the pulmonary embolism...

So, I think on Monday, I went into peace and submerged in God mode because I automatically protected myself from the complete hysteria. Tuesday and Wednesday were a bit of heck. Tuesday was just awful. I had to give myself my injection for the first time. It was very hard. My aunt and cousin were visiting when that happened. Afterwards, I got up, unhooked myself from the machines, locked myself in the bathroom, and cried. I was fine the rest of the day. I had no idea when I was coming home, that was the worst. Wednesday was hard, but I knew I was coming home that night or the next day. It was the next day, which was fine. I have never been more thankful in my life.

Yes, I'm angry that someone's negligence almost killed me. Yes, this is going to forever impact my life, but guess what? This has made me stronger, and able to understand pain better. Physical, emotional, and spiritual. I've figured out who Claire really is, and that I am worth loving not because of my future or what I put up as my identity, but because I'm Claire. I have a choice. I can forgive and live my life as a survivor or hide away and never know.

I learned that crying and showing your emotion doesn't make you weak. It's built me up. It's made me a strong tower. Those nights crying made me whole. As I write this, I remember in July, I called the171 at 11:30pm, in complete despair. I remember hearing that voice through the phone whispering, "He's going to use this. I don't know how, but He will make you a strong tower. Things happen in our lives and we don't know why, but God will take this and make it beautiful." He did, He really did. I found out what people cared about me, and who I was.

This isn't over. Yeah, I'm going to be angry and frustrated and hurting. Yeah, I am going to carry this with me. But it doesn't have to be the bad stuff. Scars tell stories. Beautiful ones and ugly ones. Mine tell both. Mine tells the story of friendship, love, hope, and complete grace.

By the grace of God I am alive. Now, not a day will go by where I will take that for granted. I am alive. There is a reason.

[b] [size=4]"Even if the healing doesn't come, and life falls apart, and dreams are still undone, You are God, You are good, forever faithful One, even if the healing doesn't come." ~ Kutless [/size][/b]

May God reward you.
~CLAIRE
[/quote]
Thank you for reminding me of everything I had to learn with my heart problems. Thank you for reminding me to say thank you and reminding me that there is a reason for it all. I am guessing you don't feel like it, but you are really an inspiration.