Should I Stop It?

[Papist]

Annie, I think you need another outlet for evangelizing. Facebook ain't it...trust me.

[Annie12]

[BG45]

Others have said everything I'm about to say in far better terms than I, just as Missy said. But, I think often the way one approaches things, is how it ends up being perceived.

For instance, I have a lot of friends of varying beliefs. I have people with PhDs who are nominally Christian or outright Atheist. I have Neo Pagans who know more about Christianity than most Christians I've met in my life (and it is thanks to many of them that I am a Catholic Christian). Devout and moderate Muslims. One friend is a Jewish man I've known since middle school who is a card carrying member of the Socialist Party. Democrats, Republicans, Independents. Pro gay marriage, anti gay marriage, pro life, pro choice, etc. Recently my asking why Chick Fil-A's stance on gay marriage was suddenly news devolved into a massive flame war and I've had to endure some possible professional consequences due to the fallout from that.

So I found myself, having had a previous such devolving situation cost me a friend, thinking, "Is it something I'm doing that's provoking these sorts of fights when I don't mean to?" And the answer was, to me at least, that even though I didn't intend for things to be read a certain way, we all bring our biases to to the table with us and view our reality through that lens. In Sociology and Criminology circles it's related to Social Construction Theory, when dealing with the media, it's called Cultivation Theory, etc. I had always prided myself on never deleting a comment or a thread, never defriending a person, but I laid down the law when I realized I was giving people too much freedom on my wall; I will delete comments now (got accused of it before anyhow) and I will delete threads if they get out of hand. Not because I want to, but because I want to safeguard my own reputation and to not be a cause of division.

What I'm trying to get to in a roundabout way is how we present things can often impact how people perceive them. Also, how people come to us with their perceptions can warp even the best of intentions. One more personal story on that front...it was the other year during the Arab Spring. I posted what I thought was the feel good article of the new millennium; Muslims and Christians in Egypt were acting as human shields for one another while the other group prayed. 150+ flame war comments over the next two days and 3 threads. No matter our intent, it can be misconstrued by someone looking for a fight.

Hope your day is going better though.

[Hubertus]

Facebook is hard to debate on because it is such a weird mix of public and personal. It's hard for someone not to get upset when seeing something disagreeable when it involves all of their friends seeing it. Every argument, every post and every little comment, is proclaimed from a pedestal for a large group of friends and relatives to see. This can make things awkward.

Also, someone can be having a bad day, in no mood to be debating something, and then they just happen upon your post with which they do not agree, and then they decide to tear you up. The more tactful discussions of real life are more tactful because you can lead into the debate, instead of just running up to someone and yelling, "GAY MARRIAGE IS BAD AND OUR SOCIETY IS GOING TO HELL IN A HAND BASKET FOR IT" (as a hypothetical example)

I would do what Papist suggested... Delete your Facebook, at least for a little while. You can resurrect it again later and you'll still have your same profile and all the same messages and everything. Taking a break from it just helps you to get some perspective on what role it really should play in your life, which should probably a very minimal role. I've done it several times and it's always refreshing.

[Jesus_lol]

As for being in peoples faces, consider the reputation of the Jehovah's Witnesses. Can you actually think of anyone seriously going "oh, yes person on my doorstep with a watchtower pamphlet, you have changed my life!"??

No. 99.9999999% grow to disrespect and laugh at them. Can you imagine knocking on your friends doors and going "excuse me, old friend, have you accepted the Lord Jesus as your holy savior?"

Many people live with family that believes differently than them, plenty on this board, and most of them are smart enough not to try and convert them over dinner.

Maybe you havent had a whole lot of experience with it, but from the few times ive heard it.
"Hey, so I ran into ____ the other day."
"oh yeah, how is he?"
"well, he has gone Born Again..."
"oh."

wouldnt have a worse reaction from "he is on drugs now and asked me for money"

[PhuturePriest]

[quote name='Annie12' timestamp='1343856004' post='2461250']
So, I can't help being fervent. It makes me very unpopular with people who know me. They see me as a "Jesus freak". It's just that I can't help it. I have no control. I open my mouth and out comes catholic stuff. It's especially bad on Facebook. I certainly have no discretion on there. I always share and post religious stuff. I've even noticed my number of friends listed on my profile is going down. I can't help but be FERVENT!!!!!! I CAN'T KICK THE HOLY SPIRIT OUT!!!! (nor do I want to) but I can't stop and was wondering should I stop or is this what God wants me to do?
[/quote]

This reminds me of Mother Angelica's philosophy. I have embraced it very much, especially since it is so easy to follow. "I didn't come here to make friends. I came here to do the Lord's will. If other people don't like it, well, that's their problem."

[Jesus_lol]

Alternatively, imagine all of your myriad recent posts about faith, and imagine it was one of your friends posting them, with "muslim" and "Allah" swapped in for "Christian" and "Jesus".

[PhuturePriest]

[quote name='Jesus_lol' timestamp='1343887352' post='2461489']
Alternatively, imagine all of your myriad recent posts about faith, and imagine it was one of your friends posting them, with "muslim" and "Allah" swapped in for "Christian" and "Jesus".
[/quote]

I honestly wouldn't care, so long as it didn't bash the Catholic Faith or Christians in general. If someone is to follow a belief they should be devout, in my opinion, and if they express their devout beliefs vocally and on the internet I do not mind so long as it is charitable. My atheist friend bashes Christians all the time and always posts links to atheist stuff. I wouldn't mind if it wasn't so uncharitable, but his ultimate goal is to bash Christianity and Religion until everyone renounces it.

[PhuturePriest]

In the name of procrastination I suppose I should add a bit more to my first post.

Mother Angelica did have this mentality, and she did seem to some as "annoying" when it came to the Faith, but those were the people who were just annoyed that she had Faith at all. Don't be pushy, preachy, or just plain annoying about the Faith. God called us to share the Faith, not to talk about it at all times without stop. It is okay to do this at appropriate places, but it annoys even the most devout of people, because sometimes we just need to talk about something meaningless like the Chiefs game. I'm in Lil'Red's boat and most of the time I post funny stuff when it comes to Religion, but others I post very serious things. It is a matter of balance. If you notice that you are losing friends I would definitely tone it down. Maybe not quit cold turkey, but tone it down and talk about other things. You'll quickly see that people will be more responsive to you and will in fact talk to you more. When all you talk about is Religion people eventually ignore your posts completely, and then the entire point of talking about Religion is lost.

One thing I would recommend if you would like to talk about Religious things frequently is making a group. You can have a Religious message a day, or maybe the current Feast Day with a link explaining the life of the Saint we are celebrating, etc. But all in all it is good to learn self-control a little better. It won't be hard, trust me, and I don't want you to feel bad when reading this. As shocking as this may be to some of you, I too was rather brash and blunt when I first got on Facebook. I would proudly challenge the President, say political things all the time, talk about this or that controversy, I was a regular news station except I didn't have to fear the media so I said whatever I felt like. Well, none too shockingly, people got annoyed, especially since with young age comes ignorance, and I didn't know much of what I was talking about. I always complained that nobody ever liked my statuses or commented. As soon as I stopped doing the political stuff people started commenting, liking, and best of all, I wasn't avoided at all costs. It's good to have an opinion, but to be one big walking opinion is of no use, I learned. I still post funny political pictures, sometimes send a link to email this or that governor to show him you support this or that bill, and I even sometimes show my displeasure at the President's handiwork, but I do not do it excessively. Again, it is about balance and your audience. If all my friends were raging liberals I wouldn't post any of this stuff. However, thankfully I live in Kansas, and if you're not a Republican you're a secluded Hermit hiding in the forest, so I don't have to worry much about offending people.

I hope you found this post useful, especially since I spent nearly half an hour writing it. Procrastination accomplished.

[BG45]

[quote name='Jesus_lol' timestamp='1343882068' post='2461456']
No. 99.9999999% grow to disrespect and laugh at them. Can you imagine knocking on your friends doors and going "excuse me, old friend, have you accepted the Lord Jesus as your holy savior?"
[/quote]

Been there, done that once as a Baptist as a youth group activity. People were surprisingly nice, even the annoyed ones.

[sixpence]

I just defriended someone today for posting blatantly anti-Christian stuff; however, I had only met them once of twice.

[Lisa]

Annie, I think there's been a lot of good comments on here.

I think we all understand that you want to bring people closer to Jesus. And, I would respectfully disagree with Papist's dismissal of Facebook. When it is done well, I think it can be a small tool of evangelization (though nothing compared to interactions in person), and it can help encourage people who feel isolated or are somewhat lukewarm in their faith. However, like the others said, we definitely need to be attentive to how we present it.

Yes, Jesus did say that the faith would inevitably cause division, and we don't need to shy away from doing what the Lord is asking of us- to bring souls closer to Him. But if something is so provocative that it might make people back away from the faith, that's not good, especially in a forum that doesn't allow people to see the silent witness of your life: the joy and peace that radiates from Christians. Conversations that challenge people with the hard sayings of the Gospel are typically best left for in person.

For what it's worth, I do post some religious things, but interspersed within "average" comments, funny things, and adorable animal memes. I've had people tell me that the verses and saint quotes that I post have really helped them. When I do post religious things, I typically put up encouraging content and generally avoid politicizing Catholicism.. there's enough of that in the media. I haven't had much backlash, I think partly because I really strive to be "in the world" (showing that I'm a relatively normal 20-something) but not of the world (I'm entering a convent in 20-some days). But hey, pretty soon I'll be deleting it altogether, and then I just get to pray for all of them!

[Annie12]

So, yesterday I took a break from Facebook. I was just sick of it all. It felt good not having to care if someone "liked" my comments or pictures. I think I will try to take a break more often. Facebook doesn't better my life. I've realized that Facebook for the most part makes me feel inferior to everyone else. It's so incredibly fake too. I have 200 friends who don't really care about me, don't even know my middle name or what my favorite color, food, hobby etc. is! I don't know why it took me so long to realize this! Facebook is just not for me! God is though... (yay!)

[LittleWaySoul]

[quote name='Annie12' timestamp='1343856004' post='2461250']
So, I can't help being fervent. It makes me very unpopular with people who know me. They see me as a "Jesus freak". It's just that I can't help it. I have no control. I open my mouth and out comes catholic stuff. It's especially bad on Facebook. I certainly have no discretion on there. I always share and post religious stuff. I've even noticed my number of friends listed on my profile is going down. I can't help but be FERVENT!!!!!! I CAN'T KICK THE HOLY SPIRIT OUT!!!! (nor do I want to) but I can't stop and was wondering should I stop or is this what God wants me to do?
[/quote]
Oh my goodness I haven't even read any replies to this yet, but I feel like you went into my mind and stole the thoughts RIGHT OUT OF MY HEAD. This is exactly, and I mean EXACTLY how I feel. Glad to know I'm not alone

[LittleWaySoul]

[quote name='Jesus_lol' timestamp='1343887352' post='2461489']
Alternatively, imagine all of your myriad recent posts about faith, and imagine it was one of your friends posting them, with "muslim" and "Allah" swapped in for "Christian" and "Jesus".
[/quote]
This is a really good thing to think about. Thank you! I can see more clearly now how I might be annoying to many of my friends.