Something Weird Happened At Mass Today

[EmilyAnn]

Title says it all and I'm not sure what to do, or if I should do anything.

The first occasion must have been a few months ago since I haven't been at my home parish in a while. It was a Sunday Mass and I went up to receive the Eucharist, nothing unusual there. Went up to the priest, bowed, "the Body of Christ", "Amen", received. Y'all know the drill. Went up to the EMHC with the chalice, bowed, . . . silence. She didn't say "the Blood of Christ", just shook her head at me and pulled the chalice closer to her. I was baffled, since it had been a gap since the last recipient so she'd have had time to notice if the chalice was empty. No, this was purely in response to me. I just kind of looked at her, I was so shocked. I just kind of went "Amen?" wondering if she'd said it while I was bowing or something and I'd missed it. She just looked at me funny and reluctantly said "the Blood of Christ" and parseed me the chalice. Then for the next recipients, she was normal.

I tried not to think anything of it but I was really shocked and quite upset by the whole thing. I just tried to let it pass as a one time thing. But then I was back at my home parish this week for the first time in a while and the same thing happened again, with this same woman! I received His Body as normal and then went up to the EMHC, bowed, and she did the whole take-the-chalice-away and shake her head deal. I couldn't believe this was happening a second time! I didn't know what to do, I just looked at her with this kind of "hello?" expression because well, I wanted to receive His Blood! What else would I have been doing standing there? She asked me something but I couldn't hear her properly over the music (we were right next to it) so I just nodded and she conceded and let me receive.

I watched her when I went back to my pew and she didn't do this to anyone else. The only thing I can think of is that I wear a headcovering, the first time probably a silk scarf in a triangle like a mantilla and this time just a normal scarf over my head with the ends over my shoulders, but then she wears a hat (though I'm not sure if that's just a fashion thing). I was really upset by this happening, not once but twice now! I'm trying to think as charitably as I can about it and not be angry but I've been really hurt by this. I'm not sure if I should speak to her, or speak to my priest or something but to me, trying to refuse someone Communion is kind of serious. It's not her place to judge who can and can't receive! But then I don't know if it would be appropriate to say/do anything, I don't know who this woman is.

Please help me Pham!

Note: Please don't turn this into a debate about EMHCs. If you want to do that, go make another thread.

Edited July 1, 2012 by EmilyAnn

[Papist]

That is odd. I would definitely approach her after marse. Ask her why she is doing that.Tell her what you think is happening, that is she is attempting to deny you the Blood of Christ. B/c if that is true, you have a right to know. Who knows what she'll say. I, myself, am curious. If necessary, I'd let her know you are not getting the same treatment from the priest.. I would then go to the pastor and let him know of your experience and conversation with the EMHC, especially if the conversation with her goes sour.

[Noel's angel]

1. Talk to her.
2. As.sume that it's a simple misunderstanding: i.e. don't go in with an accusatory tone, or 'What the heck are you doing, you evil wench?'

Edited July 1, 2012 by Noel's angel

[bernadette d]

Most odd, I would certainly want to know what is happening, do you know this lady personally, or do you have any mutual acquaintances who may shed some on light a strange happening?
Typo, sorry

Edited July 1, 2012 by bernadette d

[EmilyAnn]

I definitely trying not to be accusing or anything, I'm genuinely just confused. I'm not the most confrontational of people and after all this I'm especially scared of talking to her, but I guess it's the best thing to do. Maybe I should have tried after Mass today but I was still kind of upset, the whole thing really threw me.

[quote name='bernadette d' timestamp='1341147831' post='2451113']
Most odd, I would certainly want to know what is happening, do you know this lady personally, or do you have any mutual acquaintances who may shed some on light a strange happening?
Typo, sorry
[/quote]

I don't know this lady at all, I don't know anyone at my parish. The first time I could just dismiss as a weird one-off thing but twice now is just really weird. When I saw the EMHCs go up I saw her remembered the previous incident but just thought "it'll be fine, it won't happen again" but then of course it did!



Am I being a drama queen for being upset about this?

Edited July 1, 2012 by EmilyAnn

[NonNovi]

[quote name='EmilyAnn' timestamp='1341148906' post='2451116']
Am I being a drama queen for being upset about this?
[/quote]
No, you're not. In matters of receiving communion we can't take things lightly. It's serious bussines and you shouldn't feel uncomfortable when you go recieve the Body and Blood of our Lord. I know it happens some priests or lay people just deny people the Host when they want to recieve kneeling and on the tongue (you can see that on Youtube), because they are "too traditional" and they really don't like that. It could be something like that, as you said because of the head covering.

Just ask this lady in a friendly way if there is something wrong. And after that it's maybe a good idea to talk about this with the priest. He has to know what is going on in his Mass. The priest is boss, laypeople aren't supposed to decide themselves what can and cannot in church.

But above all, pray For this lady, for yourself and for your parish. Jesus and Mary will know what to do

[Basilisa Marie]

\Maybe she's withholding the cup because she doesn't think you're 21? I know it's silly, and it's still legal for minors to consume alcohol for religious purposes, but I've run into someone who was weird about young people receiving the Precious Blood because of the fact that there's alcohol in it.

But yeah, like others have said, definitely ask her about it. And if you absolutely can't find a way to ask her, I'd ask your priest about it.

[EmilyAnn]

[quote name='NonNovi' timestamp='1341153191' post='2451142']
No, you're not. In matters of receiving communion we can't take things lightly. It's serious bussines and you shouldn't feel uncomfortable when you go recieve the Body and Blood of our Lord. I know it happens some priests or lay people just deny people the Host when they want to recieve kneeling and on the tongue (you can see that on Youtube), because they are "too traditional" and they really don't like that. It could be something like that, as you said because of the head covering.
[/quote]

[quote name='NonNovi' timestamp='1341153191' post='2451142']
No, you're not. In matters of receiving communion we can't take things lightly. It's serious bussines and you shouldn't feel uncomfortable when you go recieve the Body and Blood of our Lord. I know it happens some priests or lay people just deny people the Host when they want to recieve kneeling and on the tongue (you can see that on Youtube), because they are "too traditional" and they really don't like that. It could be something like that, as you said because of the head covering.

Just ask this lady in a friendly way if there is something wrong. And after that it's maybe a good idea to talk about this with the priest. He has to know what is going on in his Marse. The priest is boss, laypeople aren't supposed to decide themselves what can and cannot in church.

But above all, pray For this lady, for yourself and for your parish. Jesus and Mary will know what to do
[/quote]


Thanks. I do feel kind of worried about going up for Communion now because of it. I know I could just not receive His Blood but I want too and I don't want her to stop me from receiving.

Plus I'm worried now this could be happening to other people as well but they're just not saying anything. I can understand why someone wouldn't, it actually mortifying.

[quote name='Basilisa Marie' timestamp='1341153858' post='2451145']
\Maybe she's withholding the cup because she doesn't think you're 21? I know it's silly, and it's still legal for minors to consume alcohol for religious purposes, but I've run into someone who was weird about young people receiving the Precious Blood because of the fact that there's alcohol in it.
[/quote]

I can see where you're be coming from but rhe legal drinking age here is 18 and I'm 21 now, so I'm well over it. But I can't remember if I've seen any other younger people receive from her, I was only paying attention to what she was doing when I was watching her, not who was receiving.

[Lil Red]

just a point of clarification:
both species are His Body & Blood.

[PhuturePriest]

I've experienced kind of the same thing. I have always been short (I'm fifteen and 5'3 1/2), and I remember one lady was unsure if I was old enough to receive the blood or not. She just looked at me odd and held it there in confusion. Thank goodness my mother was there to nod to her and then she immediately gave it to me. It's not quite the same thing since she didn't do it because she thought I was too young, but this reminded me of it.

Anyway, as others of said, the best thing to do is talk to her. If she's being unreasonable about it because she doesn't like your cool headgear (I really approve of that, by the way.) than you obviously bring it up with the Priest. If he doesn't listen, the Bishop, and if not him, the Cardinal, and if not him, the Pope. I would lie just so I could see the Pope, but you can do whatever you think is prudent in your situation.

[PhuturePriest]

[quote name='EmilyAnn' timestamp='1341154572' post='2451147']
Thanks. I do feel kind of worried about going up for Communion now because of it. I know I could just not receive His Blood but I want too and I don't want her to stop me from receiving.

Plus I'm worried now this could be happening to other people as well but they're just not saying anything. I can understand why someone wouldn't, it actually mortifying.



I can see where you're be coming from but rhe legal drinking age here is 18 and I'm 21 now, so I'm well over it. But I can't remember if I've seen any other younger people receive from her, I was only paying attention to what she was doing when I was watching her, not who was receiving.
[/quote]

Yet another reason to love the UK more...

[Papist]

The next time you go there, bring a friend. Ask he/she to observe and give an honest as[color=#ffffff][size=1].[/size][/color]sessment.

[Groo the Wanderer]

talk to your pastor. this should not be happening, period.

[FutureCarmeliteClaire]

My pastor *almost* denied me Communion today while I was cantoring. Because I was kneeling. Yeah.

[BG45]

[quote name='Groo the Wanderer' timestamp='1341159432' post='2451165']
talk to your pastor. this should not be happening, period.
[/quote]
This.

[quote name='FutureCarmeliteClaire' timestamp='1341159697' post='2451166']
My pastor *almost* denied me Communion today while I was cantoring. Because I was kneeling. Yeah.
[/quote]
You don't happen to live in the Diocese of Orange do you? Because last I heard, Bishop Tod Brown ordered his priests not to give Communion to anyone who dared to kneel.