Annie12 Posted June 23, 2012 Share Posted June 23, 2012 I'm having issues moving on from my past. When I was twelve or thirteen, I made some really stupid decisions that may have been and were sinful (I don't know). So, I know God has forgiven me ( because I sought his forgiveness). But I still feel like a piece of scum. I have a big issue with beating myself up about thing I did in my early teens because when I look back on those days I realize that I really didn't know my faith. Back then I might have gone to mass once a month and I NEVER prayed. So, naturally not having God in my life allowed me to make some pretty stupid decisions. Can anyone here relate and share some advice/ their story? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jaime Posted June 23, 2012 Share Posted June 23, 2012 2 Timothy 4:7 I have fought a good fight, I have finished my course, I have kept the faith. You haven't finished your course yet. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Luigi Posted June 23, 2012 Share Posted June 23, 2012 When I was a child, I spoke - and acted - like a child. Yesterday's dead. Tomorrow's blind. I live one day at a time. It's hard to let go of the past, especially the wrongs one has done. And there is the problem of consequences - if you did things that had a lasting negative effect on another person (maimed them while you were driving drunk or something), it's even harder. But if there are no (or few) lasting negative effects on other people, then the problem is mostly inside your own head. Twelve step programs deal with this all the time. Their approach is: Make an inventory of the wrongs you've done and the harm you've caused. If you can apologize & redress the wrong without causing more harm, then do it. Then it's done. Here's a link to the twelve steps: [url="http://www.aa.org/en_pdfs/smf-121_en.pdf"]http://www.aa.org/en_pdfs/smf-121_en.pdf[/url] You might try working through them in some more or less formal way - setting aside an hour for each step, writing down your thoughts for each step in a journal, working through each step with a spiritual director - depending on how serious the past actions were. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Papist Posted June 23, 2012 Share Posted June 23, 2012 You made some really stupid decisions in your past....well welcome to the club. I am a platinum member. I assume you mean you received absolution when you say God has forgiven you. Take God at His word that He has forgiven you. His mercy is much bigger than your sin. God does not want you to agonize over your confessed sins. Perhaps harness your feelings to refrain from those sins. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lil Red Posted June 23, 2012 Share Posted June 23, 2012 [quote name='Papist' timestamp='1340470047' post='2447933']You made some really stupid decisions in your past....well welcome to the club. I am a platinum member.[/quote] that's because Papist is really old. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cherie Posted June 23, 2012 Share Posted June 23, 2012 Trust in God's unfathomable mercy. Read excerpts from St. Faustina's diary. There is a story therein where a Sister was inconsolable because of her sins and didn't believe God had forgiven her, so she asked Sr. Faustina to ask Our Lord about it. He said: "Tell her that her disbelief [in My forgiveness] wounds my Heart more than the sins she committed." Don't beat yourself up. God has forgiven you in the Sacrament of Reconcilnation. Those past experiences serve to keep us humble (at least for me, if I hadn't been a sinner I would certainly have been inclined to self-righteousness about it) and show forth the beauty of God's love and mercy. Romans 8:28...God will bring forth good from it. Maybe in the future you will be able to encourage a soul going through the same struggle. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Papist Posted June 23, 2012 Share Posted June 23, 2012 [quote name='Lil Red' timestamp='1340470291' post='2447935'] that's because Papist is really old. [/quote] Yeah. That's what it is. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Spem in alium Posted June 23, 2012 Share Posted June 23, 2012 Annie, when I was 13 I did something awful. Until earlier this year (when I finally worked up enough resolve in myself to confess it in Reconciliation) I lived a life where I couldn't move on from what I had done. I hated who I was and wished I could go back and prevent my actions from occurring. I never thought confessing my sin would help me so much, but it did. After I left the confessional, I just broke down. I felt so free and unburdened for the first time in years. I felt like God had really entered my heart and removed all the hurt and regret I was feeling. And once I confessed, I actually felt my faith start to grow. It was like my sin was stopping me from knowing God better, and once it had been absolved I was just filled with this desire to be with Him and Christ. As others have said, you need to trust in the extraordinary mercy of God. Trust in His love and forgiveness - they are unconditional and everlasting. How amazing is that? It can take a lot of strength to confess sin. I was so scared of confessing (for many years I didn't even see that I needed to confess) that I held myself back. We should rejoice in this amazing Sacrament and make the most of it [quote name='Annie12' timestamp='1340462514' post='2447887'] when I look back on those days I realize that I really didn't know my faith.[/quote] Something that can help us greatly is recognising mistakes and moving on from them. I think your words prove that you've matured. Your past is [i]the past. [/i]God isn't holding your sin against you, and neither should you. Recognise where you went wrong, and try not to make the same mistake again. I believe my own experiences have made me a stronger and better person. If I hadn't moved on from what I'd done I don't think I'd like myself much, and I probably wouldn't be using this site Trust in God, accept your past and try to look for the beauty that is to be found in the present and future. God bless you! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tinytherese Posted June 23, 2012 Share Posted June 23, 2012 Sometimes the hardest person to forgive is yourself. Every time you feel like beating yourself up, ask Jesus to heal you and set you free from the past so that you can live in the present moment. Don't let your past define you. As said from the movie Meet the Robinsons, "Let go of the past and keep moving forward." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seven77 Posted June 23, 2012 Share Posted June 23, 2012 you mean you people don't have time machines yet? anyhow, its like everybody said: trust in Divine Mercy. one of the saints said, "entrust your past to DivineMercy, your present to Divine Love, and your future to Divine Providence." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Annie12 Posted June 24, 2012 Author Share Posted June 24, 2012 My situation is complicated and kind of sticky. So ya know how there are three qualifications to a sin being mortal? [quote][list] [*]Its subject must be a grave (or serious) matter. [*]It must be committed with full knowledge, both of the sin and of the gravity of the offense (no one is considered ignorant of the principles of the moral law, which are inborn as part of human knowledge, but these principles can be misunderstood in a particular context). [*]It must be committed with deliberate and complete consent, enough for it to have been a personal decision to commit the sin. [/list] [/quote] The above is taken from Wikipedia. Well, the problem is that when I was younger I didn't know the stupid things I did were bad and didn't know the gravity of the matter. Also, my memory is fogy so I feel like I am not remembering correctly. (this seems to me like I'm being scrupulous .) Anyhow, when I pray about it I really feel like God is telling me to trust in his mercy. But I just feel so confused inside. I'm gonna take this to prayer. (like I have a million times before. maybe this time I will understand what God is telling me). If ya'll could pray for me I would be forever grateful! My gut is telling me I'm being scrupulous. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lil Red Posted June 24, 2012 Share Posted June 24, 2012 Listen to your gut. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MissyP89 Posted June 24, 2012 Share Posted June 24, 2012 If you went to confession and were absolved, it's [i]gone.[/i] Gone, done, over with, wiped clean by the mercy of God. Your past is in the past. That's why Jesus came and died for you. That's how much He loves you. If you are sorry -- and it's obvious that you really are -- and you were absolved, then those sins are no longer on your soul. You're free. Rejoice in that. The only way those sins will continue to hurt you is if you allow them to control your heart. Focus on who you are now, and who you are becoming, not the person you were when you were 12. God loves you. Really. He rejoices over you. Trust in Him. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Spem in alium Posted June 24, 2012 Share Posted June 24, 2012 [quote name='Annie12' timestamp='1340498331' post='2448084'] If ya'll could pray for me I would be forever grateful! [/quote] Of course, Annie There are many similarities between what you describe and my own experiences. I hope you can find true peace with yourself and your past. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FutureCarmeliteClaire Posted June 24, 2012 Share Posted June 24, 2012 (edited) Praying for you! Mother Angelica has a lot to say about living in the present moment. One thing, "Don't look back, because in order to look back you have to stop moving forward." PM me if you need anything, chica. I understand how you feel. And I understand being scrupulous as well. Edited June 24, 2012 by FutureCarmeliteClaire Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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