My Shrink...

[MonjaFutura]

So I was having mental issues so my school made me see a shrink (which actually was kinda necessary cuz I was somewhat suicidal. I'm not now and therapy has kinda helped). She's a nice lady and everything and she knows I'm a pretty religious person because the teachers told her that when they were giving her background info on me. The problem is, she isn't Catholic and sometimes we talk about my spirituality and she suggests looking into other religions like Lutheranism or Protestantism or broadening my horizons by talking to a nonbiased pastor that's not Catholic because faith is a major decision and it's good to look at other religions. I don't think she buys anything I tell her about why I would have a vocation to religious life and she asked why I envision myself in a community and why I have to go to confession and can't just go directly to God and why I have to go to Mass and can't just believe these things in my heart and leave it at that. She asked why I'd have to become a religious and why I couldn't just be me. It's not like she'd change my faith or anything cuz I know what I believe but how could I deal with her? My insurance doesn't cover any shrinks and I don't have the money to go to one and this one's free and for the most part she's helpful but it's kinda weird to talk about religion when she's not Catholic and doesn't get my spirituality. She's not attacking me or anything (i don't know if i made it sound like that), but it's hard to talk to her about spiritual stuff when she can't really get it. Sorry if this is hard to read and totally random I just don't know what to do about it.

[franciscanlady]

Hello there, I am glad that you have been able to benefit from therapy. Most people don't understand the life of a Catholic. These same people tend to think that it is our religion that makes us unhappy or miserable. Perhaps that is why your therapists is trying to get you to look into different religions. Maybe this can be a chance for you to show her how important your Catholic faith is to you and clear up some misconceptions. It may open her eyes a bit. In the mean time just continue praying for strength. If you really want to talk to someone about your Catholic faith, try finding a spiritual director or your parish priest. Either will really be able to guide you in the right direction. I pray that everything goes well for you.

[HopefulBride]

She's helped you a lot and that's great however it seems to me that she is trying to get you to disassociate your faith from your identity and that for me would be an issue. I say go to another shrink, a Catholic one.

Just my two cents.

[savvy]

Monja,

I don't think you should share discernment with a shrink. People close have a hard time understanding, never mind others. I also think she is overstepping her bounds. It's not up to her to tell you what religion you should join. You did not go to her for religious advice. In this case finding a spiritual director would be the best thing.

[Byzantine]

A good spiritual director might even be able to take the place of a shrink.

[emmaberry]

I agree with all the above posters, and savvy & Byzantine had good points about how you could possibly find an SD who might be as helpful as this therapist is for you--but beware, all SDs are not equal!!

A firm, "My religion is very important to me, it is a constant in my life, and it is good for my overall mental health." should silence her if she is nosing her way into your religious beliefs. However, if you are bringing them up on your own and the responses she gives are making you wary, then just avoid religion in the talks you have.

I'd also share the stats with her about how physically, emotionally, and MENTALLY healthy people are who pray every day compared to the average person who goes through life barely acknowledging God.

Not the best article but just an example: [url="http://www.huffingtonpost.com/richard-schiffman/why-people-who-pray-are-heathier_b_1197313.html"]http://www.huffingto..._b_1197313.html[/url]

God bless you!

Edited June 21, 2012 by emmaberry

[Luigi]

She's crossing professional lines, which is at least borderline unethical. Next time she starts probing about religion, tell her that you'd like to get back on topic - therapy.

[maximillion]

Luigi has it. This is unprofessional behaviour and you are within your rights to suggest that she is crossing the line.
It is her role to accept your beliefs and chosen spirituality, it is outside of her role to try and become your SD too!

Try asking her about the ethical code of practice she follows and could you have a look at it. If she asks why say you are curious because you have heard that most counsellors don't venture into the realm of spirituality with their clients.

[BarbTherese]

Definitely unprofessional conduct and unethical, I think. I would be speaking with my parish priest about her and what she is saying to you and questioning you about.
My psychiatrist is an athiest, but never goes out of her area of professional competance, which is my mental health. I have seen her regularly for years and have great respect and gratitude for her. Now and then we chat about Catholicism in an objective sense as she has a friend who is Catholic with some pretty extreme concepts that are not Catholic teaching. She openly states that she feels my Faith has been a great support for me during my journey with mental illness (Bipolar) and has written references for me for various reasons in which she includes this statement. She is a professional. If your psychiatrist feels that you have psychological problems directly connected to your Faith/religion, then she should suggest you speak with a Catholic priest. Just as a priest, if he felt you had psychological problems, ideally he would suggest you speak with a psychologist or therapist, unless of course he knew he had the skills to be of assistance.

[AccountDeleted]

Since we have no idea what you actually tell her about your faith, it may be that she (not knowing the faith herself) is getting her idea and opinions from what you tell her, and they could lead her to assume that your religion is a part of your problem. Rather than immediately presume that she is stepping over the boundaries or acting in an unprofessional way, perhaps you should try telling her what you tell us, that you are worried about discussing your religion or vocation with her because she 1) doesn't understand the faith itself 2) doesn't understand the concept of vocation to religious life and/or 3) you feel threatened when she suggests investigating other religions because she doesn't understand how important your faith and religion are to you.

Psychologists often have to deal with conditions either associated with or arising out of 'hyper-religiosity' in a person. It isn't always easy for them to know when a person's faith is a symptom of their problems or a support in dealing with them, so they may try in to investigate options for dealing with what they perceive to be the problem.

The reason I mention this is that many young people of the Catholic faith suffer from 'scruples' and it isn't easy for a non-Catholic to understand what this condition is or how to deal with it. A priest could help with the scruples but not with any psychological problems you may have. A psychologist may help with those issues but not with the scruples. I would be perfectly honest with your therapist and explain to her that you don't want advice about your religion but also be aware that you may be confusing her by raising the topic of your vocation in your counselling sessions, as if it had something to do with your psychological problems? Perhaps you could even suggest to her that you might be better off with a Catholic psychologist who understand what scruples is and how to deal with it. If scruples is not your problem, then perhaps you are the one who is raising the issue of your religion and vocation too often in the session? Just some things to think about. As I said before, none of us have any idea how these topics got raised or who raised them but obviously they are an important part of your life and are going to come out in discussion, which could lead to confusion on her part.

Prayers for you.

[carmenchristi]

While I mostly agree that she shouldn't be bringing religion into the picture, it's also true that faith, and therefore religion defines so much who a person is, it's impossible to entirely separate spiritual from corporeal or psychological. Also, nunsense wrote a really great post and I would totally undersign it myself. The ideal thing to do might be to find someone else... not because it's not good to have someone challenge you but because that challenge has to be constructive. Maybe those challenges that she is giving you ARE indeed constructive, maybe not.

I myself have spent some time in therapy, with a catholic therapist who was specially trained to work with religious. She challenged me to understand my vocation and my faith. Whether or not those challenges were constructive or not however was up to me. I actually ignored a lot of them saying that she just didn't understand, but later I discovered that in many situations she was right. I ended up leaving behind certain ideas, not because she told me to, but because I discerned truth in others... only afterward did I realize that the path I chose through prayer and discernment was the same one that she challenged me to consider. In other words, challenges are good, but they must never be imposing... you have to find the answers yourself. Also, they must not cross the line. She is not your SD and shouldn't pretend to be one. I'm not suggesting you go out and try other faiths! but try and understand if any of these challenges are related to your mental health issues, or if they are totally off topic. I think that if you manage to communicate to your therapist a profound spiritual understanding (not saying you don't have it, but maybe she hasn't been able to see it) she won't question your faith as being an issue for your mental health. Though I don't know the details, I would be inclined to think that, as nunsense said, she is testing to make sure you are not hiding behind religion.... and again that you should be upfront with her about the situation.

I would not recommend stopping therapy for the reason of religion. As others have said, find a good spiritual director... someone who understands that spiritual direction and therapy are two separate things but that they are very closely related. Such a person can help you fill in the gaps and help you deal with any difficulties or contrasts with your therapist.

Hope this helps. Prayers.

Edited June 22, 2012 by carmenchristi

[Indwelling Trinity]

I have trained as a psychotherapist as well as a medical professional. If what you are saying is accurate, then it sounds to me also that what this Therapist is doing is unethical or maybe just a poor therapist.

A therapist is not there to be a spiritual guide or suggest what road to take. A good therapist allows for individual growth by allowing the client to explore options without trying to push the client in any direction. A therapist must be unbiased. If he or she cannot be so with a particular client, then he/she is better off not participating in the therapy of that individual.

If you are feeling uncomfortable with this therapist you have every right to seek one with whom you feel more comfortable.

Catholic charities and most dioceses have counseling services for priests, religious as well as those seeking religious life or priesthood. Perhaps this might be an option for you. Just a thought.

[Annie12]

I have learnd from my own exsperiences to only tell people about my vocation and faith who are close to me and I can trust. I would say to ask her to not talk about thoses issues because you don't feel she understands. I remeber another post of yours about not being able to get to mass, So, I would say that it would probably be hard for you to go to catholic charities essepially since you're a young teen. So, mabe I am just being repetitive, but devote yourself to divine mercy and the sacred heart. I had anxiety issues until I started to put my trust in Jesus vie divine mery and sacred heart. Read st. faustina's diary too. There are lots of things in there that I think you would find encourageing. I don't have the answers but God does. I can offer you encouragement though. If you ever want to talk you can message me! I also wated to show you this picture:



Good luck!

HMMM...that picture thing didn't work...sorry!