Busted :(

June 5, 2012

Please pray for me i busted 1st time in 10 mnths on drugs. It was due to being around somone whom seems to rate women in general badly, and i understand he has been through a divorce and his recent girlfriend whom he has a child to lost his child to welfare because of her drug habbits. Maybe i don't understand. Some child of God i am, a verse in the old testament says "the children of God will drink poison and not be affected." All i can do is hope to be a child of God one day i guess. This all caused me to miss sunday mass and use drugs. Possibly there is some pride in there too where i think i can drink more than i can on the poisonous viper tounges level,possibly a child of God would have the prudence to know how much poison one can drink before getting sick. And also there is anger there, i'm still furious at a priest that called me holy man and than at a later date told me my haircut was to hard. Me holy ,not even close, only the Lord is holy, but than i thought maybe he was talking about a level of holyness below God but you don't like say that to people, I don't anyhow. And on the haircut what does hair style got to do with the soul as long as it's above my shoulders. :sos: :bomb: :alone: :cuss:

P.s. there is another person i have been around that seems to hold women in to high a pedestal. I think i need to learn to be more honest face to face without pole axing them,and if they hate me for it what of it ? If this is the answer i need prayers for courage. These guys seem to be bruised reeds, both trying to follow christ, which for me makes it hard to confront them.