franciscanheart Posted June 5, 2012 Share Posted June 5, 2012 [quote name='kujo' timestamp='1338912447' post='2441205'] Thank you everyone for your kind words and prayers. It was a rough night and I can't say that I feel much better today. My mom wants me to go speak to a priest at my local parish...but I just don't want to talk to anyone right now. I feel so drained and chopped up in a way that I've never felt before. And you all are the only ones I can say anything to, outside of my family; I don't want to tell any of our friends about the last 72 hours because somehow Amanda would be incredibly embarrassed. And I would too. In any case, she needs more prayers than me. She tried to hurt herself yesterday, and that's what prompted my outbursts and what not. She's gonna get some help now that she's down with her family. She's such an amazing person...someone everyone loves the minute they meet her. These last few days, and really the weeks and months leading up to this breakdown, it was like she was possessed or something. Not her usual happy, eternally optimistic self. I'm supposed to be the cynic/curmudgeon in this relationship. If I can burden you all for more prayer that would be great. I'm sure you've all got your own stuff in your own lives that require divine intervention, so I hope I'm not being selfish by monopolizing your prayer lives. [/quote] I echo the sentiments of Ice and MS. Please do not think for a moment that any of us are burdened by your petition. Rather, know that we are delighted (truly delighted) to be able to "help" in ANY way, but most especially in such an INTIMATE way. Your heartache is indeed shared by each of us here, and we wish nothing but God's most loving embrace for all of you at this time. I can only imagine what pain must pierce each of your hearts during this time of loss. Please be assured of my most fervent prayers, and many more from the rest of the phamily you've established here -- for you, for Amanda, and for your baby now gone before you. May the Lord of Mercy show you healing, comfort and peace. We love you, bro. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sixpence Posted June 5, 2012 Share Posted June 5, 2012 cjfr1987 says he is praying too!!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kujo Posted June 5, 2012 Author Share Posted June 5, 2012 I know this--it's going to be real hard to butt heads with you all over gay marriage after all this support and love. But somehow I think I'll manage Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AnneLine Posted June 5, 2012 Share Posted June 5, 2012 Good to hear you laugh, Kujo.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lil Red Posted June 5, 2012 Share Posted June 5, 2012 [quote name='kujo' timestamp='1338921807' post='2441275'] I know this--it's going to be real hard to butt heads with you all over gay marriage after all this support and love. But somehow I think I'll manage [/quote] you'll muddle through. to be honest...for myself after our last miscarriage, since we had announced it probably 2 weeks before, it was incredibly hard to see people and to have to face questioning. i know you are hurting, but i know that your first concern is for your fiancee. it might be helpful to pre-empt people's questions, somehow...whether on facebook or a mass text or a blast email. i did it through facebook, and asked people to respect our privacy. that was incredibly helpful to not have to answer people's questions. it still hurt to see the pity in their eyes, but at least i didn't have to deal with the questions. we are all holding you in so much love and prayer and if you need anything, let us know. you can email me at oxyparadoxy @ gmail. com (no spaces) if you need anything and would like to talk privately. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Luigi Posted June 5, 2012 Share Posted June 5, 2012 [quote name='kujo' timestamp='1338912447' post='2441205'] If I can burden you all for more prayer that would be great. I'm sure you've all got your own stuff in your own lives that require divine intervention, so I hope I'm not being selfish by monopolizing your prayer lives. [/quote] That's one of the great things about God - there's no limit to the divine intervention, there's no limit to the divine mercy, there's no limit to the number of intentions we can pray for. And happy to do it for you for you, too.. if that's the right way of saying it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marie-Therese Posted June 5, 2012 Share Posted June 5, 2012 Nick and I are both sending our love and prayers to you and Amanda. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Adrestia Posted June 5, 2012 Share Posted June 5, 2012 Kujo, If one of us were to need support from you, would you consider it a burden? Somehow, I doubt it. By opening up to us you are allowing us to be there for you in the same way that you would be there for us. It's the opposite of a burden - we want to pray for you and would do more if we could. I also want to echo your mom and the others. Talk to someone as soon as you are able. Once you do, you will probably wonder why you waited so long. If the priest or counselor is lame, talk to a different one. Just don't give up or give in. Hugs for you & Amanda Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LaPetiteSoeur Posted June 5, 2012 Share Posted June 5, 2012 Prayers for you both Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
franciscanheart Posted June 5, 2012 Share Posted June 5, 2012 [quote name='kujo' timestamp='1338921807' post='2441275'] I know this--it's going to be real hard to butt heads with you all over gay marriage after all this support and love. But somehow I think I'll manage [/quote] I would prop this if I could. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Slappo Posted June 5, 2012 Share Posted June 5, 2012 [quote name='franciscanheart' timestamp='1338927329' post='2441352'] I would prop this if I could. [/quote] We may not be able to prop, but we can definitely pray Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
maximillion Posted June 5, 2012 Share Posted June 5, 2012 Don't know either of you, but prayers............... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Socrates Posted June 5, 2012 Share Posted June 5, 2012 Prayers! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jesus_lol Posted June 6, 2012 Share Posted June 6, 2012 [quote name='kujo' timestamp='1338921807' post='2441275'] I know this--it's going to be real hard to butt heads with you all over gay marriage after all this support and love. But somehow I think I'll manage [/quote] I sometimes felt ashamed to be laughing and getting in my normal routine here and there after i learned my dad had cancer, or the multiple bits of worse news since, like feeling happy was inappropriate somehow, but it absolutely isnt. I know that like me, you are a bit of a natural joker, that making other people smile makes you smile and that is a good thing. Dont hold that back out of some fear that you arent feeling grief "right". You know if i was anywhere near ya, Id be doing my best to help. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kujo Posted June 6, 2012 Author Share Posted June 6, 2012 [quote name='Jesus_lol' timestamp='1338944289' post='2441549'] I sometimes felt ashamed to be laughing and getting in my normal routine here and there after i learned my dad had cancer, or the multiple bits of worse news since, like feeling happy was inappropriate somehow, but it absolutely isnt. I know that like me, you are a bit of a natural joker, that making other people smile makes you smile and that is a good thing. Dont hold that back out of some fear that you arent feeling grief "right". You know if i was anywhere near ya, Id be doing my best to help. [/quote] Yeah. Again, there are ti[color=#282828]mes in your life when your [/color][color=#282828]mo[/color][color=#282828]m is just the only thing that can get you through. I sorta pride [/color][color=#282828]myself on not pulling the [/color][color=#282828]mo[/color][color=#282828]m card, so to speak, very often. I think a [/color][color=#282828]man ought to stand on his own 2 feet. Nevertheless, I don't know what I would've done last night if she wasn't here to look after [/color][color=#282828]me. I spent the day with her and she bought [/color][color=#282828]me so[/color][color=#282828]me lunch and dinner..and [/color][color=#282828]more scotch. She was great, and I just left her. Kinda felt like I needed to co[/color][color=#282828]me ho[/color][color=#282828]me and be by [/color][color=#282828]myself tonight. Heading back to work to[/color][color=#282828]morrow, and I believe A[/color][color=#282828]manda will be setting up a [/color][color=#282828]meeting with so[/color][color=#282828]me sort of counselor to[/color][color=#282828]morrow as well. [/color] [color=#282828]Thanks for everything, guys. Don't know how [/color][color=#282828]many ti[/color][color=#282828]mes I can say that...[/color] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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