Prayers...please

[Archaeology cat]

Kujo, we're here and have your back. It's ok if you can't do much more than try to get through it. I think that's normal. You focus on what you can, and we'll storm Heaven.

[AnneLine]

Oh, Kujo.... you are a good man, and you are fighting manfully in a tough war.

You have done a good job, I think, in summarizing the what and probably a lot of the why.... and also just how sad and angry and livid and .... [just fill in the blank] you feel. And that is just where it is right now. It won't be there forever, but it is a horrible place to have to spend some nights and days. Think of a marine in a foxhole... you don't have to look pretty or feel good... you just need to get this job done today. Just concentrate on putting one foot in front of the other and muddling through this. Set up some short-term landmarks an aim for them... like getting home so you can check-in with us, or next week when you check into Catholic Charities or another counseling opportunity.

I hope you can get in to work with the people at Catholic Charities... and if not, see if they can connect you with someone. Financially it will hopefully settle down soon; that sure donesn't help, does it.... Be sure you let CC know what is going on, and how much you really do need help right now, and hopefully they will be able to get you in on the lowest end of a sliding scale or find some kind of a grant or program that will cover some sessions. Don't forget some of the free support programs for people who have lost a child... there are people that can talk with you, and you aren't the first ones who have had stuff like this going on at the same time.

Sometimes people struggling with stuff like this find it helpful to go to something lika an AA or Alanon meeting... because there you find non-judgmental people who will understand what it is like to have to struggle every day, one day at a time, with 'accepting the things I cannot change, finding the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.'

And all of us are here praying for both of you. Again, pm me through one of the mods if you need to get me...they can give you my email.... I know several of them know how to contact me.

[Marie-Therese]

I love you man.

[PhuturePriest]

[quote name='kujo' timestamp='1340457801' post='2447868']
I have never felt such a convoluted mixture of feelings. I am so deeply sad and hurt, angry and confused, hopeless and shocked. It's the worst cocktail I've ever tasted.

I'm trying to get us through this. The monetary situation is of particular prescience, as bills are due and every penny is coming out of my wallet. Thankfully it will all be paid, on time or early, as usual. But not much else is left. The next 2 weeks will be absurdly tight.

We've talked and talked and talked. She feels awful. To elaborate a bit on what happened, she met a guy when she was out with her friends a few months back and kissed him a bit. She continued to see him but didn't...do anything, with him. I guess I can be grateful for that, though I don't know how much comfort to take in the fact that it was more an emotional connection than a physical one. I had suspected something was up for a few weeks, but fought it off as my own insecurities acting up. On Tuesday I just couldnt take it anymore and I checked her phone. There was texts and FB messages that confirmed my worst fears. Obviously I flipped out.

I don't know how to weather this storm. Despite it all, I want to be with her, and she wants to be with me. I really think this is all part of the same problem that led to the big meltdown--she is profoundly depressed and needs help. That doesn't excuse the awful thing she did to me, but it at least properly contextualizes it. As I alluded to earlier, funds for this help are low at this point, but we're trying to find something. There's a Catholic Charities center a few miles down the road that does counseling services, and we're gonna call that Monday and hope we can afford it.

I appreciate the support, but I've become really hollowed out. I just want to get through this. I went to an adoration chapel the other day and left a few minutes after...I wanted to yell and scream but there were a group of older women praying the rosary and I didn't want to be rude or disrespectful.
[/quote]

I'm really sorry you are going through a tough time. I will definitely pray for you and for her.

[MissyP89]

We've got you, sweetie.

[Amppax]

Continued prayers Kujo. Keep plugging away, all you can do. Just know, we all love you, and are praying for you. You're a pretty swell guy, most wouldn't want to stick it out after the stuff you've been through. Keep trying to pray. I'll be down your way in a couple of weeks, probably not much I could do, but if you need anything let me know, I'm there for you man.

[AnneLine]

Hey, Kujo, Hope you are doing OK.... check in from time to time & let us know how it is going. We are concerned about both of you, and it helps to hear from you ..... blessings,,,, AnneLine

[BigJon16]

[img]http://5hoursaday.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/07/tumblr_lm7q22PYpu1qey5y81.jpg[/img]


Ron Swanson says to hang in there, buddy!