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LaPetiteSoeur

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LaPetiteSoeur

I've heard plenty of horror stories from fellow discerners about their experiences telling people about their vocation.

Maybe it's because I go to a public university with a large cultural Catholic population, or because I know really nice people, but everyone who has found out has been completely razzle dazzle with it.

Many of my friends there are not Catholic (they run the gamut from Presbyterian to Methodist to lapsed [insert name of Christian religion here] to Episcopalian to Catholic to agnostic) and all of them are completely supportive. They ask really honest questions (it makes for interesting discussions) and are genuinely interested in why and how and when I'm going to enter. All of my professors/mentors think it's great and said that they can definitely tell I'm supposed to be a teaching sister, working with students and making them ask the big questions. One of my friends (who happens to be gay) told me I'd come out of the nun closet. :nun:

I wanted to post this to let you all know that most people will react normally, almost as if you are telling them "I want to be a doctor" or "I'm going to law school." The idea of telling people is frightening, but most people are perfectly fine with your decision.

Prayers for all of you. :nunpray:

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Deus te Amat

Unless they are family. :|

I'm sorry, I couldn't resist the snarky remark. Telling people is hard, and it varies by circumstance and person. You may be right, but my experience is proving to be different.

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LaPetiteSoeur

[quote name='Deus_te_Amat' timestamp='1337704592' post='2433694']
Unless they are family. :|

I'm sorry, I couldn't resist the snarky remark. Telling people is hard, and it varies by circumstance and person. You may be right, but my experience is proving to be different.
[/quote]
I'm so sorry. I'll continue to pray for you and your family. I still haven't told my cousins; their reaction won't be as positive as my friends', I'm afraid.

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Deus te Amat

[quote name='LaPetiteSoeur' timestamp='1337704653' post='2433695']

I'm so sorry. I'll continue to pray for you and your family. I still haven't told my cousins; their reaction won't be as positive as my friends', I'm afraid.
[/quote]

My friends are great. I went to a solid catholic college, so they all were supportive -- I have a close friend entering a monastery and a few friends in seminary.

Re extended family -- I don't understand how, when they haven't taken an interest in your life for the past 22 years, they suddenly think they get to have input now? I'm fine with my parent's objections. I understand them. But could someone explain the other to me? I'm more than someone you think you can/should brag about. I'm someone you should care about. Unfortunately, I feel like they view me as the former.

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Thanks for sharing this. My friends who are Catholic are razzle dazzle with it. My former youth minister told me he feels really blessed. I have not told my non-Catholic friends. I don't know how they will react, but they know that my life revolves around the church LOL. Family is a different issue. My Mum is supportive, but my siblings will be in for a surprise. I am not sure about my relatives and all. But, then it's not their decision to make.

All this and I have not even found the community I want to join. So maybe I should slow down a bit.

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AveMariaPurissima

The people I've told about my vocation have had very positive reactions. Most of the people at church have said, "That's so amesome!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" or something along those lines. My friends are either matter-of-fact about it or think it's really razzle dazzle. What really surprised me was when I told my foot doctor, who's Jewish, about my post-highschool plans. I was afraid of him asking, especially because in a previous conversation he was quite adamant in trying to persuade me that I have to go to college. When I told him, though, he reacted positively, saying something like, "Good for you!" My relatives are for the most part okay with it, although one or two of my aunts initially had an expression like, "Okaaayy," and my aunt who's also my godmother cried. My brothers: matter-of-fact. My parents, well, they're okay with it, and supportive, but I think it's difficult for them to let me go...

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i<3franciscans

Everyone I have told has been very supportive... now I just have to tell my parents. lol. :) I know they will be happy, very happy. I just need to get it out there and I am still unsure how to drop the bomb.

I did get one odd comment from a friend, he asked me why I would not want to get married and have kids. I told him I would be married and I would have more kids than I will know what to do with. :) It took him a few minutes but after some explaining he got it.

Prayers for all of you!

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[quote]I did get one odd comment from a friend, he asked me why I would not want to get married and have kids. I told him I would be married and I would have more kids than I will know what to do with. :)[/quote]

That's a great response. My brother asked me, "Don't you want any kids"? I do tell him I am marrying God. He doesn't say anything.

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MissScripture

[quote name='Deus_te_Amat' timestamp='1337705148' post='2433701']
My friends are great. I went to a solid catholic college, so they all were supportive -- I have a close friend entering a monastery and a few friends in seminary.

Re extended family -- I don't understand how, when they haven't taken an interest in your life for the past 22 years, they suddenly think they get to have input now? I'm fine with my parent's objections. I understand them. But could someone explain the other to me? I'm more than someone you think you can/should brag about. I'm someone you should care about. Unfortunately, I feel like they view me as the former.
[/quote]
I think my sister had the hardest time with some extended family, because we have family who is no longer Catholic and one of my uncles has commented in the past that, "the church is just full of a bunch of perverts." Soooo, yeah, she was freaked out to tell them. I don't think anyone said anything to her directly, though, thank goodness. But since then, I've had issues with relatives who feel the need to complain about "all the rules" and how they can't talk to her whenever they want and whine, whine, whine, which really grates on me, because c'mon, she's my SISTER! If I can find it in myself to be supportive and happy for her when I'm "losing" a lot more by her being there than they are, they can just shut up and be happy for her, too!

Prayers for you! It's tough. I definitely don't envy you. :ohno:

[quote name='savvy' timestamp='1337784995' post='2433975']
That's a great response. My brother asked me, "Don't you want any kids"? I do tell him I am marrying God. He doesn't say anything.
[/quote]
Another response is that just because someone gets married doesn't mean they'll be able to have kids, even if they do want them. Sometimes life just doesn't work out how we want it to.

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MissScripture

Also, my sister did get a lot of positive responses when she told people. My brother, who is an atheist, was even happy for her, and since seeing her at the convent, can't believe how happy she is and is really upset, because he might not get to go to her First Vows this summer. She had a lot of supportive friends, and there are relatives who are very supportive. So, everyone who needs to tell people about your decision --have hope! There are a lot of understanding people out there. And, of course, you have your phatmass phamily. :)

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Katiebobatie94

Honestly, besides a few friends the only people who know whats going on are 2 priests and 2 nuns. I want to tell my family but my mom was so against it and i feel like everything is still too fresh to tell them. they knew how she felt and i feel like it would be a slap in the face to her right now.....i will tell them eventually.

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Katiebobatie94

Just to clarify, those who do know have been more than supportive.... except my mom she wasn't

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[quote name='Deus_te_Amat' timestamp='1337705148' post='2433701']


I'm more than someone you think you can/should brag about. I'm someone you should care about. Unfortunately, I feel like they view me as the former.
[/quote]

Just pray and watch. . . I bet some of your staunchest critics will become embarrassingly proud of your choice in the years ahead. It happens all the time. They will "bragging" about your sisterness once they witness the beauty and joy of the life.

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i<3franciscans

[quote name='Katiebobatie94' timestamp='1337863007' post='2434359']
Just to clarify, those who do know have been more than supportive.... except my mom she wasn't
[/quote]
WELL I AM NOT! :P I miss you.

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PhuturePriest

The only person I really had trouble with was my brother. He really did not like the idea, but thankfully he has gotten to where he just doesn't care anymore. I had a feeling my mother did not like it either for a while, but if she didn't she got over it, it seems. My father just wants me to make sure this is the right choice, and he has stressed the fact I will not be able to date, but I really do not care about that. I'm not interested in dating anyway.

Edited by FuturePriest387
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