Anomaly Posted April 14, 2012 Share Posted April 14, 2012 (edited) I was thinking about this earlier. It seems to me that the average secularist wouldn't think anything if they knew a guy and girl living together as roommates because if they were boyfriend girlfriend they would be told that. However, scroupolus Catholics are scandalized because they think the worse and if told otherwise, they're just being lied to or it's only a matter of time before people are overcome with urges that can't be controlled. That is just twisted. And major props to you, AnneLine! It's about respect given to yourself and others. Edited April 14, 2012 by Anomaly Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AnneLine Posted April 14, 2012 Share Posted April 14, 2012 Thanks, Anomaly, for your response. I do think that there are MANY possible reactions to my post, and i am perfectly OK with people not agreeing with me, too... I can learn from others as you all can from me from time to time. one of the marks of healthy community, IMHO. I've actually learned so much from so many of you that I hesitate sometimes to share... ( I do have to go off line for a few hours, howver, so don't feel you are being ignored if i don't respond to comments...) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jesus_lol Posted April 14, 2012 Share Posted April 14, 2012 I think you are right Anomaly. For most people, being told that a man and woman, or several of either, are rooming together would be a non issue(as in, so what? thats not interesting). at the most eventually someone might ask if there is anything going on, and upon being told "no" would be totally ok with it. Whereas scrupulous Christians see an orgy behind every closed door it seems. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AnneLine Posted April 14, 2012 Share Posted April 14, 2012 Now come on, guys.... there IS a potential for scandal and also for something to happen, so I can understand where the others are coming from.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lil Red Posted April 14, 2012 Share Posted April 14, 2012 what's the saying about to the impure nothing is pure? found it: As to the pure all things are pure, even so to the impure all things are impure. Augustus Hare Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PhuturePriest Posted April 14, 2012 Share Posted April 14, 2012 [quote name='AnneLine' timestamp='1334436021' post='2417823'] Thanks, Anomaly, for your response. I do think that there are MANY possible reactions to my post, and i am perfectly OK with people not agreeing with me, too... I can learn from others as you all can from me from time to time. one of the marks of healthy community, IMHO. I've actually learned so much from so many of you that I hesitate sometimes to share... ( I do have to go [b]off line[/b] for a few hours, howver, so don't feel you are being ignored if i don't respond to comments...) [/quote] So you went from Anne Line to Off-Line? Intriguing... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kujo Posted April 14, 2012 Share Posted April 14, 2012 [quote name='Anomaly' timestamp='1334433657' post='2417815'] I was thinking about this earlier. It seems to me that the average secularist wouldn't think anything if they knew a guy and girl living together as roommates because if they were boyfriend girlfriend they would be told that. However, scroupolus Catholics are scandalized because they think the worse and if told otherwise, they're just being lied to or it's only a matter of time before people are overcome with urges that can't be controlled. That is just twisted. [/quote] You're dead-on! Kudos! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dominicansoul Posted April 14, 2012 Share Posted April 14, 2012 my Dominican sisters are neither twisted or impure... ...neither is Holy Mother Church... ...like I said before, there is a reason for concern, there is a reason to protect others from scandal... to the secularists, nothing really matters (i'm glad someone admitted that,) but to those who have a reason to protect others from scandal, (for example, two devout catholics, one a young lady, another a young man living together in the same house, even where no sin is involved---might cause scandal to those wishing to live in sin ---they will say, "well so and so who are holy rollers are doing it, why can't we?") There is also a reason that I don't find most of y'all too scandalized by the thought of opposite sexes living together: you've been conditioned by the worldly point of view... (I find that is true in most of the topics having to do with sexuality, modesty, etc.) it gives me a bit of evidence that in today's world, Catholics are thinking very much like secularists and there really isn't much of a difference between us on issues such as these... ...thus, the reason why I also mentioned, there is a total disappearance of "Catholic culture..." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lil Red Posted April 14, 2012 Share Posted April 14, 2012 [quote name='dominicansoul' timestamp='1334444380' post='2417875'] my Dominican sisters are neither twisted or impure... ...neither is Holy Mother Church... ...like I said before, there is a reason for concern, there is a reason to protect others from scandal... to the secularists, nothing really matters (i'm glad someone admitted that,) but to those who have a reason to protect others from scandal, (for example, two devout catholics, one a young lady, another a young man living together in the same house, even where no sin is involved---might cause scandal to those wishing to live in sin ---they will say, "well so and so who are holy rollers are doing it, why can't we?") There is also a reason that I don't find most of y'all too scandalized by the thought of opposite sexes living together: you've been conditioned by the worldly point of view... (I find that is true in most of the topics having to do with sexuality, modesty, etc.) it gives me a bit of evidence that in today's world, Catholics are thinking very much like secularists and there really isn't much of a difference between us on issues such as these... ...thus, the reason why I also mentioned, there is a total disappearance of "Catholic culture..." [/quote] LOL you.are.funny. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dominicansoul Posted April 14, 2012 Share Posted April 14, 2012 i think example is very important...since most of us don't evangelize like preachers on street corners, all we have is our actions..., and our actions sure do make impressions on others... (we think they don't but they do.) when it comes to this particular decision, whether or not to live with the opposite sex, prudence is a gift of the Holy Spirit... i would definitely pray about it...and let Him decide... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AnneLine Posted April 14, 2012 Share Posted April 14, 2012 (edited) Dominicansoul, I do hear what you are saying, and you are making a valid point as well. I think there is room for both sides on this continuum. My preference would be to live alone.... believe me! if i weren't called to marriage. I would HATE to have to live with a roommate, but if it were between a person who didn't share my values at all of the same sex and someone who did share my values and faith, it would be an easy question for me. For someone else, might be different, and it might make a difference what the local community's customs were. I actually had a PRIEST ask me to take in a male housemate for a short while when one of our fellow students had no where to go between roommates/semesters. I was a little shocked, and even asked about the scandal thing, and he indicated that it wasn't something I should worry about IN THIS CASE. And this was a very traditional, holy priest, mind you! There just wasn't another option available at all.... and this guy needed a place to stay for a few weeks. It worked out OK. I wouldn't have liked it to go on for long, but more because I liked my space! I respect the stance your sisters - and you - are taking on this, but as you say, it is something one needs to think and pray about and let God do the deciding... Sometimes, I think there are times when it is appropriate. But that is just me! You absolutely have the right -- and perhaps the obligation -- to choose differently. And you and the Sisters are definitly not twisted or impure... you just have a different insight into this question. And the Sisters have a different standard of Chastity to keep.... although all of us are called to live out and promote this virtue, no doubt about it. Edited April 14, 2012 by AnneLine Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cmotherofpirl Posted April 14, 2012 Share Posted April 14, 2012 Scandal can be in the eyes of the beholder. To presume people are sinning without evidence is also a sin Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AnneLine Posted April 14, 2012 Share Posted April 14, 2012 Yup, AnneLine has to go off-line sometimes... and sometimes she is just off! I just didn't want anyone to think I was being huffy & refusing to respond if I didn't reply. And... I need to go off-line again pretty quickly, because I have to do some stuff while there is still daylight here... My housework has been suffering TERRIBLY since I got the extra props.... I need to develop some discipline or I won't get anything done... I'll just PHATmass all day given the option.... oh no! Good discussion, people! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Maggyie Posted April 14, 2012 Share Posted April 14, 2012 This is an issue of cultural standards, not religious ones, there is no commandment against opposite sex housemates (obviously) the key is to determine whether within your culture you will cause comment and be setting a bad example. For instance, in some cultures, dressing modestly for a woman requires wearing a veil or even a burqa. In other cultures modesty does not require covering the hair or face and includes wearing pantaloons or swimsuits (in appropriate circumstances). When I was in my last years of college I lived in a boarding house. At first there were five other girls living there. In my last quarter one of the downstairs rooms was let to a boy. I didn't have much interaction with him (I lived upstairs) but we did share a kitchen. None of the girls was overcome by temptation (especially because boys tend to be slobby in the kitchen and make others very sad when they have to clean up after them). No one was scandalized as this is something that happens in boarding houses especially around a university. Keep in mind that it also used to be considered scandalous for a couple to be in public without a chaperone (remember Gone with the Wind?) that standard no longer applies, because our culture has changed. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
vee Posted April 14, 2012 Share Posted April 14, 2012 [quote name='Maggie' timestamp='1334447202' post='2417892'] This is an issue of cultural standards, not religious ones, [/quote] I disagree. For Catholics we are Catholic first, that is to be our primary culture. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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