Opposite Sex Housemates

[PhuturePriest]

[quote name='StClare_OraProNobis' timestamp='1334493532' post='2418119']
I actually think that this is taking Future Priest's comments way too far. He never said anything about "rape" and it does not seem he was talking about that at all. Accusing someone of having urges that would lead to something like "rape" is not only really rude but also could be damaging to that person's reputation.

Good for you that you apparently are superhuman and do not ever struggle with sexual temptations of any sort. Please show a little pity towards those of us that do.
[/quote]

Let's be friends.

[Anomaly]

And highschool and colleges shouldnt have both sexes attend. Women should cover themselves completely so as to not tempt men. If a man commits a sexual sin, it's because he can't control his will and allowed himself to be in the wrong environment.

It has nothing to do with maturity, self control, responsibility, intelligence, caution,, respect, charitability...

It takes a twisted sick mind to conclude that Laz, Jesus, Laz's sister, any disciples hanging with Jesus, either needed special divine intervention or sewn up in chastity beds at night to keep an orgy from breaking out when taking a break and relaxing in Bethany.

M Magdelene already had a bad reputation so no biggie if she traveled with a bunch of unwed guys.

I think the point is, you don't encourage or expect "benefits" in coed living situations. If you aren't mature enough to behave, don't do it. If you can't reasonably expect roomies to behave, don't move in with them.

Being in a "tempting" situation and expecting failure of yourself and others is demeaning and an excuse to not exercise self control and avoid self responsibility for you actions.

[PhuturePriest]

[quote name='Anomaly' timestamp='1334505067' post='2418161']
And highschool and colleges shouldnt have both sexes attend. Women should cover themselves completely so as to not tempt men. If a man commits a sexual sin, it's because he can't control his will and allowed himself to be in the wrong environment.

It has nothing to do with maturity, self control, responsibility, intelligence, caution,, respect, charitability...

It takes a twisted sick mind to conclude that Laz, Jesus, Laz's sister, any disciples hanging with Jesus, either needed special divine intervention or sewn up in chastity beds at night to keep an orgy from breaking out when taking a break and relaxing in Bethany.

M Magdelene already had a bad reputation so no biggie if she traveled with a bunch of unwed guys.

I think the point is, you don't encourage or expect "benefits" in coed living situations. If you aren't mature enough to behave, don't do it. If you can't reasonably expect roomies to behave, don't move in with them.

Being in a "tempting" situation and expecting failure of yourself and others is demeaning and an excuse to not exercise self control and avoid self responsibility for you actions.
[/quote]

I never said that we once we get our urges we simply cannot control them and jump the next woman we see. I'm saying that a man when he is eighteen is at his sexual prime and his urges are at an all-time high and one shouldn't be so naive as to think he has perfect self-control. Strong temptations happen and with them so does weakness. I am not saying the man will rape the girl, but sometimes the girl does give in to his offer, unfortunately. Despite what at least seems to be popular belief here, men are not perfect.

This is just a small opinion of mine, but it seems to me that a lot of women are critiquing me on male sexual urges. If I'm not allowed to speak about women hormones and periods because I do not know what it's like, women shouldn't be allowed to talk about male hormones because they don't understand them. We have stronger temptations. This is simple biology.

Edited April 15, 2012 by FuturePriest387

[Winchester]

Some people in here would probably cr[acronym=''][/acronym]ap themselves if they knew that there were masses said in some places with naked, or nearly naked, attendants.

Scandal is relative to the culture, as are all the supposed risks associated with mixing the sexes under the same roof.

[Anomaly]

[quote name='FuturePriest387' timestamp='1334505875' post='2418167']


I never said that we once we get our urges we simply cannot control them and jump the next woman we see. I'm saying that a man when he is eighteen is at his sexual prime and his urges are at an all-time high and one shouldn't be so naive as to think he has perfect self-control. Strong temptations happen and with them so does weakness. I am not saying the man will rape the girl, but sometimes the girl does give in to his offer, unfortunately. Despite what at least seems to be popular belief here, men are not perfect.

This is just a small opinion of mine, but it seems to me that a lot of women are critiquing me on male sexual urges. If I'm not allowed to speak about women hormones and periods because I do not know what it's like, women shouldn't be allowed to talk about male hormones because they don't understand them. We have stronger temptations. This is simple biology.
[/quote]Miles,
You just need to ratchet down how right your opinions may be when you post them, and not get your feelings hurt when it seems to ruffle feathers. You're generally not far off in what you're saying, it's how you say it and how you overly defend when challenged. It's not easy to communicate with nuance on the innerwebz.
Misunderstandings may be problematic, but if handled with a dash of humility and charity, it can keep the convo going. Most of the posters are 20% to 350% older and more experienced than you and haven't gotten perfect at it. Tone down the extremism of your opinion a notch, or give a validated scientific reference men have stronger urges.

[Lilllabettt]

[quote name='vee8' timestamp='1334502591' post='2418137']
and when they have been converted to the gospel their lives should reflect that. Where they wore daisy dukes before, they might now wear a longer item of clothing out of concern for God. And where they may have had certain living arrangements before , they may now have to move and change those arrangements out of concern for God who is the same yesterday, today and tomorrow.
[/quote]

LOL ... God is the same yesterday, today and tomorrow. A converted person should live their lives to reflect the Gospel. That does NOT except in the most superficial of ways mean growing your hair, wearing your hem, signing a lease etc. in a certain fashion.

Unless you think women in pantaloons are a sign of the apocalypse.

Honestly ... pre-war many people lived under one roof: friends, extended family, people of both sexes, people related to each other in the loosest of possible ways. Some families kept boarders. They'd ask for references, sure. But then, yes, they'd wantonly expose teenaged girls to the moral horror of living under a roof with an unmarried man.

[MissyP89]

[quote name='Jesus_lol' timestamp='1334478353' post='2418099']
To me, the assumption that people(typically men) have urges that are impossible to control is very "Rape-y".

"it wasnt me it was my uncontrollable urges!"


just because some people are so repressed they get sexually excited at a light breeze, and assume the same for others doesnt make it true, missy. Dont fear too much.
[/quote]

Thanks, brony. <33 Made me smile.

[quote name='cmotherofpirl' timestamp='1334504252' post='2418147']
. Hem length is not a reflection of the quality of someone's devotion to God. We are not fundamentalists: In necessariis, unitas; in dubiis, libertas; in omnibus, caritas.
[/quote]

TRUEST THING I have read all week. I wish more people understood this. Yes, generally speaking our standards on the outside will match our internal disposition. But really, we have no way at all of knowing a woman's heart [i]unless we get to know her[/i]. The girl in the long skirt and veil could be sexually active and spiritually broken, and the girl in denim capris and a ponytail could have a very intense interior life. It's not our place to judge. We have a merciful God for that.

And FuturePriest, be assured we all realize you guys likely won't rape anyone. My concern is with the suggestion that even being in the same house with a girl for too longwill set off a terrible onslaught of temptation and struggle with unknown consequences. As so many have said here, respect and maturity are huge factors in such a living arrangement. Some people can handle living that way and others cannot.

It's kind of like some couples can handle kissing before marriage or unchaperoned dates (gasp! ) while for others it would be a very bad idea. We all have to assess ourselves honestly and figure out what's best for our soul. As you say so often, everyone is different.

One last thing: to suggest guys have it worse is a load of croutons. We all suffer, just in different ways. You'd be surprised ... some of us ladies fight this battle just as hard as you do, or even harder in a lot of cases. Have you heard that some women have stronger libidos than their husbands? It's true. We're really not that different in this regard.

[vee]

[sup]17[/sup] So I tell you this, and insist on it in the Lord, that you must no longer live as the Gentiles do, in the futility of their thinking. [sup]18[/sup] They are darkened in their understanding and separated from the life of God because of the ignorance that is in them due to the hardening of their hearts. [sup]19[/sup] Having lost all sensitivity, they have given themselves over to sensuality so as to indulge in every kind of impurity, and they are full of greed.
[sup]20[/sup] That, however, is not the way of life you learned [sup]21[/sup] when you heard about Christ and were taught in him in accordance with the truth that is in Jesus. [sup]22[/sup] You were taught, with regard to your former way of life, to put off your old self, which is being corrupted by its deceitful desires; [sup]23[/sup] to be made new in the attitude of your minds; [sup]24[/sup] and to put on the new self, created to be like God in true righteousness and holiness.

[Winchester]

We shall make these pagans wear clothes over the body parts they do not find unusually tempting. Thereby, they may act as civilised folk, like us. It is proper that we should be more fully dressed whilst lusting, and these savages will understand that.

Good Christians dress in layers.

[Anomaly]

[quote name='vee8' timestamp='1334512799' post='2418208']
[sup]17[/sup] So I tell you this, and insist on it in the Lord, that you must no longer live as the Gentiles do,[b] in the futility of their thinking.[/b] [sup]18[/sup] They are darkened in their understanding and separated from the life of God because[b] of the ignorance that is in them due to the hardening of their hearts[/b]. [sup]19[/sup] Having lost all sensitivity, they have given themselves over to sensuality so as to indulge in every kind of impurity, and they are full of greed.
[sup]20[/sup] That, however, is not the way of life you learned [sup]21[/sup] when you heard about Christ and were taught in him in accordance with the truth that is in Jesus. [sup]22[/sup] You were taught, with regard to your former way of life, to put off your old self, which is being corrupted by its deceitful desires; [b][sup]23[/sup] to be made new in the attitude of your minds; [sup]24[/sup] and to put on the new self, created to be like God in true righteousness and holiness.[/b]
[/quote]Yes, you may need a new attitude.

[Winchester]

I don't know who commented on laundry in public, but that person needs to go ahead and lock himself away in a monastery, lest he run into a situation in which he finds himself rather outmatched by someone who doesn't appreciate veiled threats to women he judges as wanton.

[vee]

[quote name='Anomaly' timestamp='1334513291' post='2418213']
Yes, you may need a new attitude.
[/quote]

thats st paul speaking, not me, and thats one report for a personal attack

[Lilllabettt]

[quote name='vee8' timestamp='1334512799' post='2418208']
[sup]17[/sup] So I tell you this, and insist on it in the Lord, that you must no longer live as the Gentiles do, in the futility of their thinking. [sup]18[/sup] They are darkened in their understanding and separated from the life of God because of the ignorance that is in them due to the hardening of their hearts. [sup]19[/sup] Having lost all sensitivity, they have given themselves over to sensuality so as to indulge in every kind of impurity, and they are full of greed.
[sup]20[/sup] That, however, is not the way of life you learned [sup]21[/sup] when you heard about Christ and were taught in him in accordance with the truth that is in Jesus. [sup]22[/sup] You were taught, with regard to your former way of life, to put off your old self, which is being corrupted by its deceitful desires; [sup]23[/sup] to be made new in the attitude of your minds; [sup]24[/sup] and to put on the new self, created to be like God in true righteousness and holiness.
[/quote]

UMMMM that is St. Paul talking about conversion of heart! My point EXACTLY! Living with the opposite sex does not equal impurity, greed, deceit.

[Winchester]

[quote name='vee8' timestamp='1334513730' post='2418217']
thats st paul speaking, not me, and thats one report for a personal attack
[/quote]
Idiot.

Put me in for one, too, you oversensitive crybaby.

I guess that's two.

[cmotherofpirl]

Using the Scriptures as a weapon can also be construed as an attack, the fundamentalists do it all the time.