The Secret Pasts Of Phatmassers

[Nihil Obstat]

As it turns out, FP is not the only former pro wrestler on Phatmass.
Not The Philosopher was extremely successful under the pseudonym Yoshihiko, back in the mid 1800s.

[media]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ybFjynJvfzY[/media]

He was often called one of the most versatile wrestlers on the Japanese circuit. He had a truly terrifying mix of flying moves and leg drops. According to some of his contemporaries whom I have interviewed, many of the regulars in the same association were afraid to fight him, so the producers introduced an unofficial "Yoshihiko Premium" of an additional 20% on top of their regular pay for big matches.

Edited September 22, 2012 by Nihil Obstat

[Not The Philosopher]

Now you've done it.

Before we know what's happened, this forum will be overrun by fans who obsessively google my name.

[Nihil Obstat]

In some circles Future Priest is known as "Korean Ken", for reasons that will be made obvious over the next three minutes.
Frankly, I think his partner AnneLine was the better performer, but fame is fickle that way.

[media]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SyJVVQfV5go[/media]

[Nihil Obstat]

Winchester and Sternhauser in Russia shortly before the revolution:

[img]http://images.icnetwork.co.uk/upl/birmmail/may2008/0/8/E29A0B37-CC5D-C030-F22F54CF2CC3B412.jpg[/img]

Their hope was to assist in the overthrowing of the czar, then redirect and convert many of the young idealists away from Leninism and towards anarcho-capitalism.
However, when their plans were discovered they were immediately arrested and managed to flee Russia with the help of Henry David Thoreau and Leo Tolstoy.

[Groo the Wanderer]

i was one of the original power rangers.




then i took an arrow to the knee.

[Nihil Obstat]

Back in the good old days, there was a young fellow known as Eagle_Eye222001. Except he did not commonly go by that name at the time, but rather by the name of Professor Chan T. Rollingham, from the Fourchon Institute of Technology. Of course he is famous for a groundbreaking thought experiment which studied the nature of velocity and hardness. I have reproduced his results below:

 

Due to extensive research done by the Fourchon Institute of Technology, diamond has been confirmed as the the hardest metal known the man. The research is as follows.
Pocket-protected scientists built a wall of iron and crashed a diamond car into it at 400 miles per hour, and the car was unharmed.
They then built a wall out of diamond and crashed a car made of iron moving at 400 miles an out into the wall, and the wall came out fine.
They then crashed a diamond car made of 400 miles per hour into a wall, and there were no survivors.
They crashed 400 miles per hour into a diamond travelling at iron car. Western New York was powerless for hours.
They rammed a wall of metal into a 400 mile per hour made of diamond, and the resulting explosion shifted the earth's orbit 400 million miles away from the sun, saving the earth from a meteor the size of a small Washington suburb that was hurtling towards midwestern Prussia at 400 billion miles per hour.
They shot a diamond made of iron at a car moving at 400 walls per hour, and as a result caused two wayward airplanes to lose track of their bearings, and make a fatal crash with two buildings in downtown New York.
They spun 400 miles at diamond into iron per wall. The results were inconclusive.
Finally, they placed 400 diamonds per hour in front of a car made of wall travelling at miles, and the result proved without a doubt that diamonds were the hardest metal of all time, if not just the hardest metal known the man. 

 

Of course it is not even necessary to mention how this study revolutionized our understanding of the hardest metal known the man, as well as the space-time implications of material per hour measurements.

 

 

[carmenchristi]

I must admit that I didn't recognize this as a comeback of an old thread and read "The secrets of phatmassers' p.ants" :eek:

[Nihil Obstat]

I must admit that I didn't recognize this as a comeback of an old thread and read "The secrets of phatmassers' p.ants" :eek:

 

My secret hope every time I bump it is that it will not be recognized as an older thread, causing people to re-read the entire thing. :|

[carmenchristi]

Anyone who would re-read 6 pages of this... stuff... has SERIOUS issues!

[Nihil Obstat]

Anyone who would re-read 6 pages of this... stuff... has SERIOUS issues!

 

Or a keen and unrelenting desire to EXPOSE THE TRUTH.

[NonNovi]

Anyone who would re-read 6 pages of this... stuff... has SERIOUS issues!

 

I just did, I must have issues  :sad:

[carmenchristi]

I just did, I must have issues :sad:

Yup! That, or you must be REALLY bored.

[carmenchristi]

Am I risking having my "past life" revealed by the above statements.... Fear and trembling. :gulp:

[Nihil Obstat]

 

Yes, it is true, the young Hindu child wearing glasses is actually Slappo, around the year 1897, just after his audience with the Tsar.

Edited March 15, 2013 by Nihil Obstat

[Nihil Obstat]

The famous thought experiment designed by Arfink in 1956, which won him the Nobel Prize in astrobiology:
 
 
Due to extensive research done by the Fourchon University of Science, diamond has been confirmed as the the hardest metal known the man. The research is as follows.
Pocket-protected scientists built a wall of iron and crashed a diamond car into it at 400 miles per hour, and the car was unharmed.
They then built a wall out of diamond and crashed a car made of iron moving at 400 miles an out into the wall, and the wall came out fine.
They then crashed a diamond car made of 400 miles per hour into a wall, and there were no survivors.
They crashed 400 miles per hour into a diamond travelling at iron car. Western New York was powerless for hours.
They rammed a wall of metal into a 400 mile per hour made of diamond, and the resulting explosion shifted the earth's orbit 400 million miles away from the sun, saving the earth from a meteor the size of a small Washington suburb that was hurtling towards midwestern Prussia at 400 billion miles per hour.
They shot a diamond made of iron at a car moving at 400 walls per hour, and as a result caused two wayward airplanes to lose track of their bearings, and make a fatal crash with two buildings in downtown New York.
They spun 400 miles at diamond into iron per wall. The results were inconclusive.
Finally, they placed 400 diamonds per hour in front of a car made of wall travelling at miles, and the result proved without a doubt that diamonds were the hardest metal of all time, if not just the hardest metal known the man.

Edited March 15, 2013 by Nihil Obstat