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A Secret All Men Should Know


she_who_is_not

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she_who_is_not

So, I'm probably never going to get married or date ever again, but I thought I should enlighten all the men on PM as to what nice, God-fearing, modest, submissive girls really want in a future husband:


Back Hair.


All women love fuzzy, scratchy, flowing back hair. But we don't want to see it, of course. Until our wedding night. Or maybe a couple of nights after the wedding, because planning a wedding is really exhausting and we should make a holy hour, pray the rosary, and read the book of Tobias before we, well, no good woman would mention what we might do sometime in the weeks or months following the nuptial mass. Just don't let us see your back hair. Women don't like to see it, we just want to know that it is there. We don't want to see your knees either. Men really shouldn't be interested in the type of woman who would enjoy seeing a man's back hair or knees before the wedding, anyway.

And another thing, you don't need to try to listen to me or understand my feelings. It's really unattractive and presumptuous to be asked how your day was or if you have spoken to your mom today. Men who ask women how they are feeling are just boring. It makes a woman feel unfeminine when you ask her how she is feeling rather than complimenting her ankle length skirt or asking for more mustard on the sammich she just whipped up for you. Girls need to feel useful Ask us for a sammich, and then after we've made the sammich, cleaned up the kitchen, and then sat down to enjoy TV, ask us to fetch you a beer. That's what a girl who is seriously looking for a husband wants. Don't waste your time trying to make us laugh or telling us we look pretty. We totally see through that. We want clear and simple instructions. Orders. And back hair. Lots and lots of back hair.

Edited by she_who_is_not
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I first read that as B[b]l[/b]ack Hair, and I thought, "Hey, I have that. But what's so special about the most common hair colour?"










And then I read the next paragraph.

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