For My Dad

[beatitude]

Dear phamily,

I was at my parents' home a few days ago and I discovered pornographic websites in the Internet history of our computer. My mum is a complete technophobe and she never goes online, so the only person who could be responsible is my dad.

I found out that he was using porn when I was still an undergrad, a few years ago now. He denied it, even though the proof was pretty incontrovertible (I found a DVD hidden under the cushion in the computer room when I was hunting for an earring I'd lost, and the Internet history was riddled with it). He just said that a colleague from work had given it to him and he apologised and got all flustered and left the room in a hurry. He blamed the Internet history on a virus. I was too miserable to confront him on it. My parents were having marriage problems at the time, and I was miserable generally. I hated being at home and I felt so sorry for my mother. Loyalty is one of her best qualities, and I know she'd be distraught if she ever found out.

They got over the rocky time and I assumed (hoped) that the porn use had disappeared with the marital trouble, especially as I never saw any other clues. Evidently I was wrong.

I think my dad will need strong prayers to overcome this. He's a wonderful man and this is something I struggle to reconcile with what I know of his character. Of course only God knows the darkest places of our hearts. But He also knows the best things, so please pray that He will bring out the best in my dad and enable him to stop damaging himself and our family.

Thank you.