brandelynmarie Posted November 23, 2011 Share Posted November 23, 2011 Baby steps...baby steps! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lil'Nun Posted November 25, 2011 Author Share Posted November 25, 2011 (edited) Argh. Is it just me or does everyone find themselves stalking their email accounts and spam fiddlers after they have emailed Convents? I have [i][b]already [/b][/i]chewed through my fingernails and am down to the quick and it's not even been that long! Nerves? I haz them. Edited November 25, 2011 by Lil'Nun Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AccountDeleted Posted November 25, 2011 Share Posted November 25, 2011 [quote name='Lil'Nun' timestamp='1322219607' post='2340302'] Argh. Is it just me or does everyone find themselves stalking their email accounts and spam fiddlers after they have emailed Convents? I have [i][b]already [/b][/i]chewed through my fingernails and am down to the quick and it's not even been that long! Nerves? I haz them. [/quote] That's why I like it when a community actually gets back to you and tells you when you will hear from then again! I emailed one community and they wrote back and said their Prioress would get back to me on the 1st December. The waiting is hard but at least I know not to expect anything before then so no haunting the mail boxes right now. It is hard to wait for replies so I hope you hear soon. The really bad part is when they never write back - I've had that happen a few times too and there comes a point in time when you just figure - hey - I guess I'm not going to hear from these people. Usually I try at least one more time but there are a few communities where I have phoned, emailed and snail mailed and still had no response at all! Bad manners is what I call it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lil'Nun Posted November 25, 2011 Author Share Posted November 25, 2011 Thanks Nunsense. That is something that worries me a bit particularly when you are sending an email to an address on a site that might not have been updated for a long time. I am hoping I have send emails to the right email addresses. In your experience how long should someone wait before trying to contact a Convent again? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AccountDeleted Posted November 25, 2011 Share Posted November 25, 2011 [quote name='Lil'Nun' timestamp='1322222388' post='2340308'] Thanks Nunsense. That is something that worries me a bit particularly when you are sending an email to an address on a site that might not have been updated for a long time. I am hoping I have send emails to the right email addresses. In your experience how long should someone wait before trying to contact a Convent again? [/quote] That would depend on the community. If you are sending to a cloistered one, I would probably wait at least a week before trying to phone or email again because they might only check their emails once a week. If they are an active community, or have a visible presence online (such as DigitalDame's community does) then I would expect that they could get back to you within a few days, three at the most probably, but once again, that does depend upon what's happening in their world. So, I would say don't worry for at least a week. For things like snail mail - it could take a lot longer. I waited a month to hear back from a community in England after I sent a snail mail, but then I am at the bottom of the world too! The ones I sent recently to the US, I heard back from all of them except one within three days, and two of them asked me to wait for a longer reply later and gave me dates so I wouldn't become anxious worrying about it! Naturally I was very impressed with these communities. They obviously had to discuss my situation with at least their councilors as I am outside their age range, and perhaps they even wanted to run it by the community as well, but they first let me know that they would get back to me as soon as they had an answer about a live-in visit for me. Fill up your time with other things so you don't spend all your time worrying about an answer. Then when it does come, you will be pleasantly surprised because you weren't sitting around waiting for it. It's a bit like waiting for a guy to call - no point in sitting by the phone waiting - get out and enjoy life in the meantime!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lil'Nun Posted November 25, 2011 Author Share Posted November 25, 2011 [quote name='MaterMisericordiae' timestamp='1321817226' post='2338578'] I would certainly recommend the [url="http://www.graceandcompassionbenedictines.org.uk/"]Benedictine Sisters of Grace and Compassion[/url] in Brighton, England. My friend discerned with them and, though they didn't work out for her, she had nothing but nice things to say about the community. She is an older vocation (52 years old) and they accepted her with no issues. They are nurses and care for the elderly. [/quote] These Sisters look really lovely. I have an interest in the Benedictines but they place a very intense emphasis on the LOTH and I am more drawn to quiet personal prayer. I am not sure if the emphasis on one would mean less of the other, if you know what I mean? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AccountDeleted Posted November 25, 2011 Share Posted November 25, 2011 [quote name='Lil'Nun' timestamp='1322225333' post='2340316'] These Sisters look really lovely. I have an interest in the Benedictines but they place a very intense emphasis on the LOTH and I am more drawn to quiet personal prayer. I am not sure if the emphasis on one would mean less of the other, if you know what I mean? [/quote] All religious pray the Office, but some do have more of an emphasis on it than others. Dominicans are more into study than the Benedictines, who are definitely focused on the Office. Their motto is Ora et Labora (prayer and work) which basically means the Office and their work, although some communities have more Exposition/Adoration than others and all seem to have some time set aside for private prayer. I think if you have been feeling an attraction to the Dominicans, then perhaps this is a good Order to stay focused on for now. Your affinities may change over time, or you may find a community where you feel you can develop a long term relationship which will do you well when you are finally ready to think about entering. It might be a good idea, since you are an older vocation to try to keep things simple in your discernment rather than scattering your energies around a lot of different places. That is what I am trying to do right now. I know the Order I want and now I am trying to focus on where I want to be, God willing. That means, I am not trying to seek out a lot of different communities, but to work on one or two at a time, until they either let me know I can visit or not. Then I will work out a live-in visit with only one of them and focus on establishing a relationship with them. I wish you well in your endeavours too. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OnlySunshine Posted November 25, 2011 Share Posted November 25, 2011 [quote name='Lil'Nun' timestamp='1322219607' post='2340302'] Argh. Is it just me or does everyone find themselves stalking their email accounts and spam fiddlers after they have emailed Convents? I have [i][b]already [/b][/i]chewed through my fingernails and am down to the quick and it's not even been that long! Nerves? I haz them. [/quote] I'm going through that right now. I emailed the Postulant Director for the RSMs this past weekend and I have been checking my email countless times each and every day. Nothing yet, still. LOL! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lil'Nun Posted November 25, 2011 Author Share Posted November 25, 2011 Can you IMAGINE what it must be like doing this by snail mail? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Totus Tuus Posted November 25, 2011 Share Posted November 25, 2011 [quote name='Lil'Nun' timestamp='1321807867' post='2338537'] Thank you for your advice. It is much appreciated. I have been considering Dominican Sisters of Saint Joseph [url="http://www.dominicansrs.co.uk/"]http://www.dominicansrs.co.uk/[/url] Dominican Sisters of St. Catherine of Siena [url="http://www.stone-dominicans.org.uk/Welcome.html"]http://www.stone-dom...uk/Welcome.html[/url] The SSVM who are in Ireland - but I think the Sisters share cells so am not sure how much time there is to be alone in prayer with the Lord either in the chapel or in the cell. I do need to find out more about the prayer life of these though. But I don't know if it is okay to contact them, and get into a long conversation, when I can't enter yet. [/quote] Solitude in the cell is always required in religious life, whether or not the cell is shared. You guys wouldn't be talking to each other much most likely, per the rules, so it shouldn't inhibit your prayer life to share a cell. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TheresaThoma Posted November 25, 2011 Share Posted November 25, 2011 I have a hard time waiting to hear back from communities too. I typically wait about 2 weeks before I try contacting them again. Something I have found though is once you do hear back you can figure out the "rhythm" of communication. For example I know one VD will get back to me pretty quickly whereas another will take a couple of weeks. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LaPetiteSoeur Posted November 25, 2011 Share Posted November 25, 2011 [quote name='TheresaThoma' timestamp='1322241855' post='2340384'] I have a hard time waiting to hear back from communities too. I typically wait about 2 weeks before I try contacting them again. Something I have found though is once you do hear back you can figure out the "rhythm" of communication. For example I know one VD will get back to me pretty quickly whereas another will take a couple of weeks. [/quote] Very true. Some of the more growing orders (NDs, DSMMEs, etc) or those that have very busy apostolates tend to take longer. It is a good lesson in patience for any discerning soul! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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