Strictlyinkblot Posted October 10, 2011 Share Posted October 10, 2011 The more I pray the happier and more peaceful I feel. Not exactly rocket science but it kinda surprised me. I was so sad to be leaving Ireland last Friday especially as Mum had to go into hospital. She's okay, it wasn't an emergency but it would've been in a week or so if that makes sense. Now I feel so peaceful and joyful. Its a wonderful gift from Our Lord. I emailed as many carmelite communities as I could find the email address for and several have already replied. My plan is to try to visit two or three on my holidays. alot, I know but I have to try to keep the cost down. I informed God that I wanted to go to Malahide. Sea views, the prioress is wonderful, authentic community, near home so parents and best bud can visit. What's not to like? Except.... I keep being reminded of that verse from the book of Ruth 'Where you will go I will go and your people will be my people'. The idea of Kirk Edge keeps reoccurring in my head. I don't know why. I'm not particularly attracted to austerities. You might ask why do I want to be a carmelite then. Chuckle! I don't think I've a particularly romantic view of cloistered life. To be honest I'm quite scared that I won't be able for it. And Kirk Edge from everything I've read is particularly austere. But as I keep reminding myself, if God wants me to be there I'll be able for it. Sorry about the somewhat confused post. Its strange to feel so happy and at peace on the one hand and scared on the other. Oh, and I have an interview for a new post on Wednesday at midday. Please pray for me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HopefulBride Posted October 10, 2011 Share Posted October 10, 2011 [quote name='Strictlyinkblot' timestamp='1318284134' post='2319323'] The more I pray the happier and more peaceful I feel. Not exactly rocket science but it kinda surprised me. I was so sad to be leaving Ireland last Friday especially as Mum had to go into hospital. She's okay, it wasn't an emergency but it would've been in a week or so if that makes sense. Now I feel so peaceful and joyful. Its a wonderful gift from Our Lord. I emailed as many carmelite communities as I could find the email address for and several have already replied. My plan is to try to visit two or three on my holidays. alot, I know but I have to try to keep the cost down. I informed God that I wanted to go to Malahide. Sea views, the prioress is wonderful, authentic community, near home so parents and best bud can visit. What's not to like? Except.... I keep being reminded of that verse from the book of Ruth 'Where you will go I will go and your people will be my people'. The idea of Kirk Edge keeps reoccurring in my head. I don't know why. I'm not particularly attracted to austerities. You might ask why do I want to be a carmelite then. Chuckle! I don't think I've a particularly romantic view of cloistered life. To be honest I'm quite scared that I won't be able for it. And Kirk Edge from everything I've read is particularly austere. But as I keep reminding myself, if God wants me to be there I'll be able for it. Sorry about the somewhat confused post. Its strange to feel so happy and at peace on the one hand and scared on the other. Oh, and I have an interview for a new post on Wednesday at midday. Please pray for me. [/quote] Wonderful to hear things are progressing so well. And it seems that you are indeed listening to the Lord's voice in your heart. Prayers for you! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OnlySunshine Posted October 10, 2011 Share Posted October 10, 2011 It's always wonderful to see people so excited about following God's will in their lives. I love reading that you have surrendered to doing what God wants of you -- even if that means something that you aren't particularly attracted to like the austerities of Carmel. It shows a level of spiritual maturity. Prayers for what awaits you! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
brandelynmarie Posted October 10, 2011 Share Posted October 10, 2011 [quote name='Strictlyinkblot' timestamp='1318284134' post='2319323'] .... I keep being reminded of that verse from the book of Ruth 'Where you will go I will go and your people will be my people'. The idea of Kirk Edge keeps reoccurring in my head. I don't know why. I'm not particularly attracted to austerities. You might ask why do I want to be a carmelite then. Chuckle! I don't think I've a particularly romantic view of cloistered life. To be honest I'm quite scared that I won't be able for it. And Kirk Edge from everything I've read is particularly austere. But as I keep reminding myself, if God wants me to be there I'll be able for it. Sorry about the somewhat confused post. Its strange to feel so happy and at peace on the one hand and scared on the other. [/quote] I mentioned this somewhere before, but I often tell my CT patients (especially the wee ones) that being brave doesn't mean not being scared; it means doing what you have to do [i]while[/i] you you feel frightened. So in that sense, yes, you can have 2 distinct feelings at the same time. You can be peaceful in God's will & still feel overwhelmed & even scared of what you may have to do. It is also a very human response to the unknown. I'm figuring that there will be things I will struggle with if/when I enter. But I am willing to try & try again & bumble along if I have to, asking for forgiveness of my failings & faults. All we can do is keep trying to respond to God's gifts of grace. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OnlySunshine Posted October 10, 2011 Share Posted October 10, 2011 [quote name='brandelynmarie' timestamp='1318289623' post='2319356'] I mentioned this somewhere before, but I often tell my CT patients (especially the wee ones) that being brave doesn't mean not being scared; it means doing what you have to do [i]while[/i] you you feel frightened. So in that sense, yes, you can have 2 distinct feelings at the same time. You can be peaceful in God's will & still feel overwhelmed & even scared of what you may have to do. It is also a very human response to the unknown. I'm figuring that there will be things I will struggle with if/when I enter. But I am willing to try & try again & bumble along if I have to, asking for forgiveness of my failings & faults. All we can do is keep trying to respond to God's gifts of grace. [/quote] Thank you for posting this. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
brandelynmarie Posted October 10, 2011 Share Posted October 10, 2011 You're welcome. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AccountDeleted Posted October 10, 2011 Share Posted October 10, 2011 I loved Kirk Edge very much and I hope you will be happy there. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Strictlyinkblot Posted October 11, 2011 Author Share Posted October 11, 2011 [quote name='brandelynmarie' timestamp='1318289623' post='2319356'] I mentioned this somewhere before, but I often tell my CT patients (especially the wee ones) that being brave doesn't mean not being scared; it means doing what you have to do [i]while[/i] you you feel frightened. So in that sense, yes, you can have 2 distinct feelings at the same time. You can be peaceful in God's will & still feel overwhelmed & even scared of what you may have to do. It is also a very human response to the unknown. I'm figuring that there will be things I will struggle with if/when I enter. But I am willing to try & try again & bumble along if I have to, asking for forgiveness of my failings & faults. All we can do is keep trying to respond to God's gifts of grace. [/quote] That is so true, thank you. The Carmelite way of life is so different to me. What I mean is, the structure, the early mornings, the mental prayer. I have a great love of adoration of the Blessed Sacrament but I know the Carmelites don't have that regularly, although of course it varies from carmel to carmel. Part of me feels quite confused that God doesn't seem to be leading me to an order such as the Poor Clares, Benedictines of Adoration or other orders which have much more of a focus on Adoration but He knows what he's doing. I do worry that I'm being rather selfish for considering places outside of Ireland because of my parents but I have at least two years to figure it out. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OnlySunshine Posted October 11, 2011 Share Posted October 11, 2011 [quote name='Strictlyinkblot' timestamp='1318292494' post='2319407'] That is so true, thank you. The Carmelite way of life is so different to me. What I mean is, the structure, the early mornings, the mental prayer. I have a great love of adoration of the Blessed Sacrament but I know the Carmelites don't have that regularly, although of course it varies from carmel to carmel. Part of me feels quite confused that God doesn't seem to be leading me to an order such as the Poor Clares, Benedictines of Adoration or other orders which have much more of a focus on Adoration but He knows what he's doing. I do worry that I'm being rather selfish for considering places outside of Ireland because of my parents but I have at least two years to figure it out. [/quote] Well, if you ever come to the United States, there is at least one Carmelite order with daily Adoration! [url="http://mtcarmel.stormpages.com/"]Carmelite Nuns of St. Louis, MO[/url] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AccountDeleted Posted October 11, 2011 Share Posted October 11, 2011 [quote name='Strictlyinkblot' timestamp='1318292494' post='2319407'] That is so true, thank you. The Carmelite way of life is so different to me. What I mean is, the structure, the early mornings, the mental prayer. I have a great love of adoration of the Blessed Sacrament but I know the Carmelites don't have that regularly, although of course it varies from carmel to carmel. Part of me feels quite confused that God doesn't seem to be leading me to an order such as the Poor Clares, Benedictines of Adoration or other orders which have much more of a focus on Adoration but He knows what he's doing. I do worry that I'm being rather selfish for considering places outside of Ireland because of my parents but I have at least two years to figure it out. [/quote] Kirk Edge has Exposition of the Blessed Sacrament and Benediction once a month and the sisters are rostered to spend an hour each before the Blessed Sacrament during the day. Their mental prayer is one hour morning and night, which may be done in the choir or (on nice days when Mother allows) in one of the hermitages in the gardens. They have one hermitage reserved for Novices and three other ones to use as well. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Strictlyinkblot Posted October 11, 2011 Author Share Posted October 11, 2011 [quote name='MaterMisericordiae' timestamp='1318293064' post='2319418'] Well, if you ever come to the United States, there is at least one Carmelite order with daily Adoration! [url="http://mtcarmel.stormpages.com/"]Carmelite Nuns of St. Louis, MO[/url] [/quote] [quote name='nunsense' timestamp='1318293157' post='2319419'] Kirk Edge has Exposition of the Blessed Sacrament and Benediction once a month and the sisters are rostered to spend an hour each before the Blessed Sacrament during the day. Their mental prayer is one hour morning and night, which may be done in the choir or (on nice days when Mother allows) in one of the hermitages in the gardens. They have one hermitage reserved for Novices and three other ones to use as well. [/quote] Oh, that's wonderful. I've been warned several times when I visited different Carmels that its not part of the charism in the way that it is for the Benedictines of Adoration and other such orders. The Malahide Carmelites have adoration once a week and they also have a small oratory with a tabernacle that the sisters can use and expose the Blessed Sacrament during private prayers. I tried to access the website for the St. Louse nuns but my computer warned me that its been hacked or something. I'll try them tomorrow. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OnlySunshine Posted October 11, 2011 Share Posted October 11, 2011 [quote name='Strictlyinkblot' timestamp='1318293568' post='2319423'] I tried to access the website for the St. Louse nuns but my computer warned me that its been hacked or something. I'll try them tomorrow. [/quote] Really? Huh! I wonder why... I have Norton Internet Security 2011 and was able to access it with no problem. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
brandelynmarie Posted October 11, 2011 Share Posted October 11, 2011 [quote name='Strictlyinkblot' timestamp='1318292494' post='2319407'] I do worry that I'm being rather selfish for considering places outside of Ireland because of my parents but I have at least two years to figure it out. [/quote] If I enter, I doubt I will see my father again because of his health & I'm not certain my family would be able to visit much at all, whether I am 3 hours away or 3 states away. Time will tell. But no matter where I go, or whether they can visit me or not, all will be well if it His will for me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OnlySunshine Posted October 11, 2011 Share Posted October 11, 2011 [quote name='brandelynmarie' timestamp='1318294550' post='2319432'] If I enter, I doubt I will see my father again because of his health & I'm not certain my family would be able to visit much at all, whether I am 3 hours away or 3 states away. Time will tell. But no matter where I go, or whether they can visit me or not, all will be well if it His will for me. [/quote] When I first started discerning, I was only interested in orders that were nearby so my parents could visit often. With the help of my mom and my former spiritual director, I opened up to the possibility of being called to an order that was across the country. My parents have continued to remain supportive through the process of looking. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Strictlyinkblot Posted October 11, 2011 Author Share Posted October 11, 2011 [quote name='brandelynmarie' timestamp='1318294550' post='2319432'] If I enter, I doubt I will see my father again because of his health & I'm not certain my family would be able to visit much at all, whether I am 3 hours away or 3 states away. Time will tell. But no matter where I go, or whether they can visit me or not, all will be well if it His will for me. [/quote] I would be in the same position as my parents find it very difficult to travel. And who knows when I'd see my best friend and her children again but its in God's hands Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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