You Are Prolife, How Do You Feel About Adoption?

[Jesus_lol]

More specifically how do you support it? How would you feel about your tax money going to support adoption?



honestly, it bums me out that the only time i see people here discussing adoption is when trying to keep kids from being adopted by gay people. Adoption is the one real thing that can make a direct impact on abortions, and the quality of life that those children can have. It deserves to be in the conversation as a real option.

[Tab'le De'Bah-Rye]

pax domine,
Adoption iz fabulous as opposed to foster care, i say bring back the orphanages,seriously. The reason i don't like foster care awhole lot is foster children can be passed around in a sense and never have any real security/stability in the most important time of there life these foster children can go from foster family to another foster family there whole child hood 1-18 and that trauma can settle on them for there whole life

God bless you all
JC "seek and ye shall find,knock and the door will be opened"

St francessca cabrini "one whom dares nothing recieves nothing,a missionary should be fearless."
St Mary mackillop of the cross "be eager in your desires,but patient in there accomplishment"

[tinytherese]

I heard it put this way, "Adoption-The Other 'A' Word."

I have a cousin who was adopted as a newborn. I'd like it if tax money went to support adoption. Adopting a child isn't cheap. I'd also like it if when talking about adoptions that people wouldn't just focus on adopting infants. (Note that I am not against people adopting infants, just that more people should be open to at least considering adopting an older child.) There are toddlers, older children, and teenagers who need loving parents too.

Another option to consider is adopting a child of whatever age with medical issues. How sad it is to hear about couples who choose to abort their baby because of medical problems. If they can't be convinced that even though such a child is hard to take care of that they are blessings as well, then maybe we could invite them to consider having the child adopted, but that is presuming that someone or some couple could be found who is willing to adopt an infant with special needs.

[tinytherese]

[quote name='Tab'le Du'Bah-Rye' timestamp='1317975284' post='2317332']
pax domine,
Adoption iz fabulous as opposed to foster care, i say bring back the orphanages,seriously. The reason i don't like foster care awhole lot is foster children can be passed around in a sense and never have any real security/stability in the most important time of there life these foster children can go from foster family to another foster family there whole child hood 1-18 and that trauma can settle on them for there whole life.
[/quote]

I agree. On top of that, children's homes should be staffed with people who are loving and competent in taking care of them. I know that a lot of people complain about the foster care system. I know about this one religious community in New Hampshire called The Daughters of Mary, Mother of Healing Love that runs a children's home for children who for whatever reason are separated from their families. [url="http://motherofhealinglove.blogspot.com/2007/10/who-are-daughters-of-mary.html"]http://motherofheali...rs-of-mary.html[/url]

Edited October 7, 2011 by tinytherese

[beatitude]

This is something that I would like to do one day - become an adoptive parent or long-term foster carer. I've done a lot of work with profoundly disabled teenagers, one of whom was adopted because his birth mother didn't feel capable of bringing him up, and I've always felt so moved and grateful for that unknown woman's decision. She respected her own limitations, but she also respected her son's life. After meeting him (a very thoughtful kind young man with huge enthusiasm for life) I wondered how many other people like him would be here if only adoption had been more widely publicized as an option. When I am in a stable position financially (and not a full-time grad student living off fingernail clippings and cheap couscous), I'll contact my local council about it. In the meantime, I pray for everyone involved in this work.

[faithcecelia]

I have an adoped cousin. Due to her parents age, the only way they were likely to be given a baby in the UK was if the baby was severely disabled (which they did not feel they could cope with, after giving thought) or if they had an 'open' adoption, which meant 2 letters and photos a year to the birth mother up to the age of 10. So they went with that, and were soon introduced to 'Bubbles' as she was then called (the foster mum always used silly names so the adoptive parents had a blank canvas for names) when she was just a couple of weeks old. Sophie in now about 20 and is forever being told how much she is like her father - and its true, she has all his mannerisms. At a family party 8yrs ago there was a little girl with beautiful blond ringlets. I was sitting with some of the older kids and Sophie said 'Oh look at her lovely hair, its not fair, my hair is just frizzy' I replied saying I totally understood as my hair is too curly to be straight and too straight to be curly. She laughed and said yes, it must run in the family! Bless her, she even has our slightly unusual combination of dark hair and fair skin with blue eyes.

Sophie's birth mother was a 14yr old girl who had been raped by her father. She knew she could not give that baby the life she deserved, but that she could not justify killing the baby either. I think she was a very mature young woman, and I am grateful for her gift to my cousins and indirectly to the rest of the family for giving us Sophie.

[faithcecelia]

I think there should definately be more government funding, especially for helping 'difficult' adoptions. I watched a documentary some months ago which showed a severely disturbed little girl, aged about 9 I think, with her foster parents who wanted to adopt her. They had already adopted about 7 or 8 other children, all special needs in one way or another, so their hesitation over this girl speaks volumes. She had already been through 2 failed adoptions.

The programme showed the battle this lovely, generous and committed couple had to go through to get the basic level of support and counselling they knew were essential if this child would ever be able to intergrate into a family. Finally a specialist centre donated X number of sessions, and on seeing the results, the Social Services accepted that this was what she needed and agreed to fund for another 2yrs. With this assurance the couple finally adopted her, and her delight at finally, [i]finally[/i] having a forever family was phemoninal. If the social had not funded the treatment, the couple knew that they would have to admit defeat.

[Archaeology cat]

My sister's husband is adopted, and they're thinking about adopting once they've been married a bit longer and are a bit more settled. He's Korean, and I think he wants to adopt from the same orphanage he was in. We had foster brothers who have been adopted by another family (ironically, my sister married into that family). I would consider adoption, but it really is expensive. So I'd like it if there were some assistance or some way to bring the cost down.

[AccountDeleted]

I think it would be wonderful if more stable, loving couples wanted to adopt children, especially Special Needs and Older Children. I fostered and then adopted two older girls (one 12 and the other 7) - both were from dysfunctional families and suffered physical and emotional abuse. I did the best I could as a single parent, but if there were more couple who would do this, it would be fantastic for these kids. So many people want babies, and I can understand that, because one does not have to deal with the problems caused by other people, but it is still hard on the kids who are shunted from one foster home to another, some good and some terrible. I did open adoption which has its pluses an minuses. When dealing with dysfunctional birth families, it is difficult for the child every time they have a visit with their birth family and then come home again -- so many stressed and feelings of rejection over and over again. But they also don't wonder who their 'real' mother or father is, and they can maintain contact with siblings. It takes a lot to do this, but more people are needed all the time since so many children are abused today.

[BG45]

I know plenty of people who have adopted over the years, but rarely from within the United States due to how prohibitively expensive it can be. I would love to see some sort of assistance in bringing the cost down via tax money rather than see all that money go down the drain to support immoral abortion practices; one memorable thing that happened the other year adoption wise to a family I know is that they had been in the process of adopting from a Central American nation for almost two years. They flew down to pick up their son, only to be informed that someone had misplaced some paperwork and that it would be another year; one of the US Senators from our state got a call about it from the embassy and flew down to help them in person. It was one thing to treat a random American couple like dirt it seems, but another to try and tell a ranking member of committees that have an influence on funding portions of your government with foreign aid "no".

Something about adoption that makes me want to cry though is the recent scandals in the last few years out of China. [url="http://news.xinhuanet.com/english/2009-07/03/content_11648503.htm"]Not all of the public orphanage babies, it seems, are there because their families actually gave them up.[/url]

[MissScripture]

[quote name='Jesus_lol' timestamp='1317974429' post='2317326']
More specifically how do you support it? How would you feel about your tax money going to support adoption?



honestly, it bums me out that the only time i see people here discussing adoption is when trying to keep kids from being adopted by gay people. Adoption is the one real thing that can make a direct impact on abortions, and the quality of life that those children can have. It deserves to be in the conversation as a real option.
[/quote]
You're just not looking in the right places, cuz I was talking about it on the lame board the other night. Sadly, adoption isn't seen as an option by many people seeking abortions, because of the way children in general are viewed in this world, today, as commodities. I've heard a couple of women who have had abortions (and now regret it) talk about how they had the idea of adoption mentioned to them, and they were appalled that someone wanted them to give their baby away, and said if they couldn't have their baby, they didn't want anyone to. But, even worse, many women aren't even having adoption suggested to them. And then you have the kids with birth defects who are being aborted, when their parents would've kept a baby without a birth defect, and I'm pretty sure adoption isn't typically brought up in those situations, either.

I am hoping to adopt, someday. It had always been something we talked about, because there was a possibility that due to my health I wouldn't be able to have kids. Now that we know I can, we're still considering it, and would actually like to look into adopting kids with special needs, specifically Down Syndrome.

[MissScripture]

[quote name='BG45' timestamp='1317988751' post='2317388']
I know plenty of people who have adopted over the years, but rarely from within the United States due to how prohibitively expensive it can be. I would love to see some sort of assistance in bringing the cost down via tax money rather than see all that money go down the drain to support immoral abortion practices; one memorable thing that happened the other year adoption wise to a family I know is that they had been in the process of adopting from a Central American nation for almost two years. They flew down to pick up their son, only to be informed that someone had misplaced some paperwork and that it would be another year; one of the US Senators from our state got a call about it from the embassy and flew down to help them in person. It was one thing to treat a random American couple like dirt it seems, but another to try and tell a ranking member of committees that have an influence on funding portions of your government with foreign aid "no".

Something about adoption that makes me want to cry though is the recent scandals in the last few years out of China. [url="http://news.xinhuanet.com/english/2009-07/03/content_11648503.htm"]Not all of the public orphanage babies, it seems, are there because their families actually gave them up.[/url]
[/quote]
I'm surprised that it would be cheaper, and I think that would somewhat depend on your requirements. I've heard stories like the one you've said fairly frequently, actually, when it comes to foreign adoptions, because the governments want the money to keep coming in, so they drag out the process to force more visits and additional fees and such. I think it really depends on how you do it in the states, and I know it gets easier and cheaper if you're willing to take kids with special needs and kids of a different skin color. I also know that it can be hard to get an accurate history for some kids with foreign adoptions, so you could end up adopting a child with special needs or at least very, very delayed due to early care, without really realizing it, anyway.

[LaPetiteSoeur]

One of my best friends is adopted, as are his three siblings. It was through Catholic Charities that he was placed with him mom and dad. I'm so glad his birth mother put him up for adoption, as he's a wonderful friend and like a brother.

I'm not sure how the government could support it, maybe a tax credit? I'm sure if money can fund abortion, adoption should and can be funded.

[stevil]

I would hate to see people adopt as a means to gain income, and put the kids to serious work. There is a risk of this.
But for the most part people who adopt are amazing people. It has got to be a very tough job, especially when the kids have had bad upbringing and distrust people and challenge your authority, e.g. "Your not my Mum, I hate you", kids often don't have the maturity to understand the wonderful things adults do for them, and the need for boundaries and discipline.

[Jesus_lol]

It is too bad, many prolife people i have talked to also said that they would never consider adopting a child, and others would refuse to allow tax money to help "aint my problem".

I understand the Catholic Church used to do a lot of adoptions?