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Emails To Give *insert Name Of Loved One Here* A Heart Attack


brianthephysicist

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MargaretTeresa

Dear phamily,
I am running off with this really cute reporter I met this weekend. We're going to go cover the drug wars in Mexico! He said we'd be perfectly safe - only 76 journos have been murdered there since 2000. I'm so excited!
Love,
MT

PS - He said he's already had a gun pulled on him multiple times! HOW COOL IS THAT!?



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Dear dad,
Before I revealed I was dating someone once you always accused me of being gay. Once the relationship ended you said I'd become a priest. I've run off to Siberia with a bunch of Russian Neo Pagans, please send your latest wrong prediction to my forwarding address. Bai.

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Marie-Therese

[quote name='MissyP89' timestamp='1315202925' post='2300396']
Dear Catherine,

So fuarakdning srrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrnk. Strangerz drive me home. hahahahaha kbyeeee.
[/quote]

I literally spit when I read this. Did this message come from the inside of a closet, mayhap? rotfl

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Dear mother

Remember when I became Catholic and some people told you 'she might as well have become a Jehover's Witness'? Well....

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Dear You Know Who, why do we call you He Who Must Not Be Named? It makes no sense, can you hear your own name? What if I spell out a few letters. V-O-L-D...bai!

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[quote name='missionseeker' timestamp='1315240981' post='2300515']
Dear Mom,

I may have a job opportunity in Iraq. I would leave at the end of the month. What think you?



:|
[/quote]

Sorry, you're not allowed to go. :stubborn:

[quote name='Marie-Therese' timestamp='1315246029' post='2300559']

I literally spit when I read this. Did this message come from the inside of a closet, mayhap? rotfl
[/quote]

No, but it did come from the inside of my cell phone. *cough* :hehe:

[quote name='MargaretTeresa' timestamp='1315233730' post='2300483']
Dear phamily,
I am running off with this really cute reporter I met this weekend. We're going to go cover the drug wars in Mexico! He said we'd be perfectly safe - only 76 journos have been murdered there since 2000. I'm so excited!
Love,
MT

PS - He said he's already had a gun pulled on him multiple times! HOW COOL IS THAT!?



rotfl rotfl rotfl rotfl rotfl rotfl rotfl rotfl rotfl rotfl rotfl rotfl rotfl
[/quote]

Gold. You win.

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Dear Mom and Dad,
I've decided to quit school and my job because they take away from the time I could be on phatmass. kbye

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MargaretTeresa

Dear Mother,
You remember when you dyed my khaki capris lime? I hope you like that color... for your hair.

Love,
Your least favorite daughter.

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Dear Dr. M., I realize you want a fully finished Vita tomorrow for class, but it's taking forever to actually list out every course I ever substituted in. Can I just put "[name of old school] I AM THE LIBERAL ARTS"? Just kidding, I'll break it down so you don't kill me...

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Dear Phamily:

I met this really handsome guy who is smart and kind. He owns a topless bar and that is where I met him. Btw, we are getting married next week and also I'm preggers. K bye!

Edited by Lil'Monster
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