Separated Parents Confusion

[Byzantine]

My parents separated over the Church. I live with my mom and spend parts of weekends with my dad. Now, I drive a car that technically belongs to my mom, although I'm the only one who drives it. Occasionally, my dad gives me orders about it that I find just plain pointless and sometimes dangerous. Examples:
[list]
[*]Keep windows down when you're not in the car
[*]Turn everything off when you get out of the car
[*]Don't listen to music in the car (meanwhile, I've had my license for almost half a year and always listened to music when my mom was with me)
[/list]
Can my mom nullify things like this? I mean, it [i]is[/i] her car and I do live with her. Some of the orders, like the rolling down windows, just seem to invite things like theft, bugs, etc. Just wondering...

[ardillacid]

When my scrupulosity was at its worst I never listened to what people said as far as advice goes, I just wanted to hear if something was a sin or not.

Parents are not infallible. If your dad told you not to eat your wheaties when you are at your moms house would you do it?

[Mr.Cat]

[quote][url="http://www.scborromeo.org/ccc/para/2217.htm"][b]Catechism of the Catholic Church[/b][/url]


[b]2217 [/b]As long as a child lives at home with his parents, the child should obey his parents in all that they ask of him [u]when it is for his good or that of the family[/u]. "Children, obey your parents in everything, for this pleases the Lord." Children should also [u]obey the reasonable directions[/u] of their teachers and all to whom their parents have entrusted them. [u]But if a child is convinced in conscience that it would be morally wrong to obey a particular order, he must not do so[/u].

As they grow up, children should continue to respect their parents. They should anticipate their wishes, willingly seek their advice, and accept their just admonitions. [u]Obedience toward parents ceases with the emancipation of the children[/u]; not so respect, which is always owed to them. This respect has its roots in the fear of God, one of the gifts of the Holy Spirit.[/quote]If you are driving a vehcile that belongs to someone else always try to respect that, so in this case listen to your mom first, she owns it. Follow the applicable laws, rules, and guidelines of the roads because you are on public property.

Edited September 18, 2011 by Mr.Cat

[BigJon16]

[quote name='Mr.Cat' timestamp='1316313753' post='2306103']
If you are driving a vehcile that belongs to someone else always try to respect that, so in this case listen to your mom first, she owns it. Follow the applicable laws, rules, and guidelines of the roads because you are on public property.
[/quote]

So I can still call you Mr. [u]C [/u]Cat?

hahahahahahaha

Edited September 18, 2011 by BigJon16

[AccountDeleted]

Perhaps you could ask your Mom to give you a direct order about these things (like 'always shut the windows and lock the car for insurance purposes'). That way, if your Dad questions you for not obeying his instructions, you could always say that you have to obey your mother's requests in this instance because they affect her more directly (without showing him any disrespect). Your father will probably not assume legal and financial responsibility for the car if anything happens to it, and this would fall onto your mother to handle. So in this instance, it is really imperative that her wishes be followed, without trying to cause any more problems between them than can be avoided.

With regard to the smaller issues (like playing music), for the sake of peace, I would not play music while my father was in the car, but ask my mother if she minded if I did this at all other times. That way you don't have to feel bad about doing it when you are not with your Dad. As for turning everything off when you get out of the car - this just sounds like good advice, so you don't wear the battery down!

Sometimes things get very complicated and upsetting when parents split up... but it is a good time for you to practice patience and tolerance while still honouring your parents.