"meant To Be"

[kujo]

[quote name='Norseman82' timestamp='1311029773' post='2269696']
Feelings can be deceiving.

A few years ago, I felt "this one, at last" about the lady I was dating.

Then she entered a religious community.

Go figure.
[/quote]

Thanks, but I believe God has blessed me with better than average instincts. I've always been very intuitive and, regardless of however fleeting a certain emotion might be, my instincts tell me that this is the one.

And she's almost assuredly NOT going to be entering a religious community anytime soon. Not Catholic...not interested

[Norseman82]

[quote name='kujo' timestamp='1311031669' post='2269746']
Thanks, but I believe God has blessed me with better than average instincts. I've always been very intuitive and, regardless of however fleeting a certain emotion might be, my instincts tell me that this is the one.

And she's almost assuredly NOT going to be entering a religious community anytime soon. Not Catholic...not interested
[/quote]

Weren't you once engaged to a phatmasser named Alicyn?

http://www.phatmass.com/phorum/index.php?showtopic=93921

[Era Might]

I don't believe in a "soul mate," but I do believe in Providence. They are two different things. Sometimes there are just accidents of birth (e.g., where you are born) that help determine who you eventually marry. Yet, even accidents of birth can be part of Providence.

As far as the idea of "meant to be," I think this is just a case of we are usually drawn to people we click with on some level, so of course it seems like you're "meant to be." That doesn't mean you're "soul mates." Yet Providence is still at work in some way that can't be explained.

Edited July 18, 2011 by Era Might

[Cherie]

[quote name='Lil Red' timestamp='1311030282' post='2269707']
yeah, i don't know if i believe that.
[/quote]

Why not? Seems like a given to me. Nothing happens apart from His Will, it's just a fancy way of recognizing that.

[Norseman82]

[quote name='Era Might' timestamp='1311032324' post='2269750']
I don't believe in a "soul mate," but I do believe in Providence. They are two different things. Sometimes there are just accidents of birth (e.g., where you are born) that help determine who you eventually marry. Yet, even accidents of birth can be part of Providence.

As far as the idea of "meant to be," I think this is just a case of we are usually drawn to people we click with on some level, so of course it seems like you're "meant to be." That doesn't mean you're "soul mates." Yet Providence is still at work in some way that can't be explained.
[/quote]

I accept "providence", but "providence" does not necessarily mean that there is only one person out there for you. God's providence may simply mean that He steers you away from someone who could be a disaster for you, but there could be [b]many others[/b] that could be perfectly suitable for you.

[Norseman82]

[quote name='CherieMadame' timestamp='1311032750' post='2269756']
Why not? Seems like a given to me. Nothing happens apart from His Will, it's just a fancy way of recognizing that.
[/quote]

But God gave us a free will.

[Cherie]

[quote name='Norseman82' timestamp='1311032908' post='2269759']
But God gave us a free will.
[/quote]

Yes. But nothing happens apart from His Will, either His permissive will or ordained will. It's still His will.

[Cherie]

I'm not saying there aren't possibly other people out there with whom a marriage would work. Sure. Love is a [i]choice [/i]of the will[i],[/i] not a "feeling," so in theory you could "make it work" with just about anybody. But I don't think the idea of "there are other people out there that I'm compatible with" is really the issue, nor do I think it's really worth contemplating if you're married. You're married to the person you are, and God has willed it so. I certainly believe God brings people together. I believe that happened with me and my husband. For me, soul mate = the spouse God intended for you. And I definitely believe God intends certain spouses for certain people.

I like that idea that CatherineM said: marriage [i]makes[/i] you soul mates. St. Thomas Aquinas said that if you have made final vows, then that's it: you're called to religious life. No reason to doubt your calling at that point. (Basically - he says it much more eloquently, haha) I think that's the same with marriage. You get married, voila: there's your soul mate. Now get workin'!

[Norseman82]

[quote name='CherieMadame' timestamp='1311033655' post='2269771']
For me, soul mate = the spouse God intended for you. And I definitely believe God intends certain spouses for certain people.
[/quote]

Is this a personal opinion or official Catholic teaching. If the latter, please dump the appropriate document.

[Papist]

[quote name='Norseman82' timestamp='1311046045' post='2269840']
Is this a personal opinion or official Catholic teaching. If the latter, please dump the appropriate document.
[/quote]
I doubt the Church has official teaching on one's soulmate. I think the term is kind of made up.

[Cherie]

[quote name='Norseman82' timestamp='1311046045' post='2269840']
Is this a personal opinion or official Catholic teaching. If the latter, please dump the appropriate document.
[/quote]

That's what I [i]believe;[/i] no, it's not official Catholic teaching (that I know of, anyway), but like Papist said, I highly doubt the Church has an official teaching on "soulmates"!

But I also use the examples of the Saints, as in the case of Bd. Zelie Martin, the mother of St. Therese: One day when she was crossing the Bridge of St. Leonard, Zélie noticed a man passing by and heard an interior voice. It said, ‘This is he whom I have prepared for you.’ That man was Louis Martin.

I think that's a great example

[Papist]

[quote name='CherieMadame' timestamp='1311078797' post='2269944']
That's what I [i]believe;[/i] no, it's not official Catholic teaching (that I know of, anyway), but like Papist said, I highly doubt the Church has an official teaching on "soulmates"!

But I also use the examples of the Saints, as in the case of Bd. Zelie Martin, the mother of St. Therese: One day when she was crossing the Bridge of St. Leonard, Zélie noticed a man passing by and heard an interior voice. It said, 'This is he whom I have prepared for you.' That man was Louis Martin.

I think that's a great example

[/quote]
Nice example. Do you believe that by doing so, you are complying with God's plan for you? That is how my wife and I understood it. I just wish I would have done a better job preparing myself.

[Norseman82]

[quote name='CherieMadame' timestamp='1311078797' post='2269944']
That's what I [i]believe;[/i] no, it's not official Catholic teaching (that I know of, anyway), but like Papist said, I highly doubt the Church has an official teaching on "soulmates"!

But I also use the examples of the Saints, as in the case of Bd. Zelie Martin, the mother of St. Therese: One day when she was crossing the Bridge of St. Leonard, Zélie noticed a man passing by and heard an interior voice. It said, ‘This is he whom I have prepared for you.’ That man was Louis Martin.

I think that's a great example
[/quote]

Private revelations are not binding on the general Church.

[Era Might]

[quote name='Norseman82' timestamp='1311032847' post='2269757']
I accept "providence", but "providence" does not necessarily mean that there is only one person out there for you. God's providence may simply mean that He steers you away from someone who could be a disaster for you, but there could be [b]many others[/b] that could be perfectly suitable for you.
[/quote]
I don't believe in "could be's." The world could have been created any other number of different ways perfectly suited for me. The sun could be blue. Chocolate could taste like pizza. I could marry this woman instead of that woman.

I inhabit the world that exists in reality. There could be any number of children that I could have that would be perfectly suitable for me. In fact, ANY child I have would be perfectly suitable for me, for the mere fact that it is MY child. But I have the children I have, for whatever reason, whether by accident, by providence, whatever the great mysterious interplay of human and divine is.

I don't believe that the spouse you have is a coincidence anymore than I believe that the children you have is a coincidence or a mere pick of the draw. And yet I don't believe that God is determining every step in your life and drawing people together like two beads on a string. I can't explain Providence, except to say that in my experience, everything that has happened in my life has seemed to put me in the right direction, even when I went in the wrong direction.

Remember that God himself is compared to a husband of a harlot in the Old Testament. If God's own wife was a harlot, and that harlot was his Chosen People whom he would not divorce, what does that say about Providence!

Edited July 19, 2011 by Era Might

[kujo]

[quote name='Norseman82' timestamp='1311032276' post='2269749']
Weren't you once engaged to a phatmasser named Alicyn?

http://www.phatmass.com/phorum/index.php?showtopic=93921
[/quote]

That was a joke she and I played on Missy, BG and MiKolbe. Funny thing is that I had just met my current girlfriend at the time, and had to clear it with her first, explaining the context of the whole thing. Good times.


[quote name='Papist' timestamp='1311076457' post='2269935']
I doubt the Church has official teaching on one's soulmate. I think the term is kind of made up.
[/quote]

Word! But, for some, unless it's spelled out for them by a cardinal or a pope, they just don't know what to believe!

[quote name='Papist' timestamp='1311082041' post='2269995']
Nice example. Do you believe that by doing so, you are complying with God's plan for you? That is how my wife and I understood it. I just wish I would have done a better job preparing myself.
[/quote]

Preach, dude! I feel the same. It's like that Bebo Norman song "Perhaps She'll Wait." It's all about thinking about your future spouse, praying for them to be better than you have been. There's a beautiful line that has always resonated with me "Every single heart that I have held in my hand/in my clumsy hands/I fumbled them around until they fell/it's much safer ground just keeping to myself."

How many hearts were you careless with, in your ignorance, before you met your wife? I bet my number is larger

[quote name='Norseman82' timestamp='1311116223' post='2270402']
Private revelations are not binding on the general Church.
[/quote]

So what? They're also not NOT binding. God revealing to you that you are, indeed, with a beautiful child of His and that He does bless and accept your relationship is great. Why so serious?