Single Women: Interacting With Our Brothers In Daily Life

[Santa Cruz]

[quote name='AudreyGrace' timestamp='1310675086' post='2267463']
maybe a purity ring?
[/quote]

I think the purity ring is great!

[quote name='MissScripture' timestamp='1310698982' post='2267608']
I don't want to over-generalize, but I think it might have to do with your location, too.

Basically, some guys are creeps, some guys are amesome, and some fall somewhere in between. And don't settle for less than someone who treats you with dignity and respect, but don't assume all guys are just going to be jerks. And make sure you respect yourself, because if you don't, no one else will, either.
[/quote]

Words of wisdom


Gosh, I have been reflecting much on this very topic myself lately. I am currently living in an unfamiliar area caring for my grandmother and I have never ever experienced such inappropriate advances from men in Church and yes, even married men. On one occasion I was waiting in line following Mass to ask the priest to hear my Confession when the man in front of me said, "I find you very sexy and attractive." I froze in shock and horror and the priest turned to address the situation. But, what the priest said actually made me feel smaller than the man who made the disgusting comment. The priest said to the man, "You are going to scare her". Then the priest turned to me and said, "Did he scare you? Don't worry about him, he is married and his wife attends Daily Mass". My first reaction was to look at what I was wearing, baggy jeans and a sweater with a very high neckline, just enough room to squeeze my head through and I had a shirt underneath the sweater which hung out. I was very well covered and I always dress modestly and most especially when it is in the teens outside and the ground is covered with snow. I had on layers! And, it was 7 a.m.! My hair was pulled back and I had on no makeup. I feel deeply for this man's wife!

I also noticed that women are not at all friendly toward single women and there seems to be an air of suspicion about single women. I just came from a monastery and will be returning to religious life shortly. I got my eyes fixed on Jesus and I only go to Church to attend Daily Mass and for Adoration and Confession. Otherwise, I just do not at all socialize there. But, what an unwelcoming air I feel from other women there. Granted, I have asked the pastor not to tell people that I am entering religious life because I would rather use this time as a retreat and remain hidden and unknown. But, as a result, people seem to think I may steal their husband and some men act like well, dogs.

I do think it is the area as Miss Scripture mentioned. I am in a very rural area...

Also, about a month ago, while waiting in line for Confession, a woman sitting next to me said to me after a man approached her and handed her something, "That was my husband and today we celebrate 38 years of marriage." I told her, "That is wonderful!" She said "No, he has filed for a divorce and he had an internet affair with a woman singing in the choir." What???!!! Well, that put things into perspective. I can understand why people are suspicious of single women at that parish!

But, what seems to be the key lacking ingredient is that women are not treated with dignity and respect. Apparently they are seen as sex objects. I have purchased Christopher West's "Naked Without Shame" talks on JPII"s "Theology of the Body" and I am going to gift it to the pastor when I say goodbye. I have tried discussing the problem I see with him but he just does not get it, perhaps because he was raised with this mentality being from this area himself.

So all that to say, I feel your pain. It is something we can surely pray for and also whenever possible, educate folks on proper relationship with God and neighbor.

Oh and Welcome to Phatmass it is great to meet you here!