Details Of The Day To Day Life In Religious Orders

[Lisa]

[quote name='dominicansoul' timestamp='1306367735' post='2245999']
Dominicans have a code, and that code is in place so that newbies can experience the "surprises" that come with the life. I don't know how many times Mother called me into her office when I was a Novice, to tell me to "put a lid on it" because in my zeal, I was way too open about the upcoming events the postulant's were in for... She wanted them to be SURPRISED. That's all there is to it. I am happy I didn't belong to a phorum in the months before I entered, because if someone blabbed everything that was going to happen to me the first year, especially the community's own unique traditions, I woulda been a little bummed...


...after Mother's little chastisement, I went off to create my own "traditions" for the postulants....like, when I told them they had to go barefoot to the Mass of the Last Supper...boy, I got into lotz of trouble for that one!!!
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Funny!

way off topic story: when I was little I would always spoil my older sister's birthday by telling her what her present was. So when I was probably 8 or 9ish, I decided that to keep the real present a secret, I would make up a fake present. So a few days before her birthday, I told her she was getting a beach towel (instead of her real present, a soap-making kit). She was furious and beat the croutons out of me! Then, when she got her soapmaking kit, she was confused and only felt a little bad.

[Yaatee]

[size="3"]I think that some basic information regarding day-to-day practice is essential. Some people may enter a very conservative Carmel, for example, thinking that their customs are essential to Carmel where, in reality, they are not. I would especially find difficult the mandatory control of recreation, speak only with permission and only to left or right, and being able to provide no information on your previous life, especially if one is expected to live in a 'family'--about whom one knows nothing. Then one might leave Carmel and not learn until years later that not all Carmels have these customs. One might enter somewhere and break one's health on a horarium she could not sustain, only to learn that horaria vary from Carmel to another--or any monastery. If one really does not believe in use of the discipline, it is important to know ahead of time whether a monastery uses it. One women entered a group not knowing that they were going to merge with another group she didn't what to join. She ended up leaving.

The other reason for a gradual introduction to entrance is that for the mature candidate, a lot is at stake. A job, a house, an apartment , a car, friends. One can lose it all and not necessary be able to get any of it back. There is less risk if one enters after high school or college.
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Edited May 26, 2011 by Yaatee

[AccountDeleted]

'Spoiling a pleasant surprise' is a little different than explaining things that might help someone to make a better, well informed decision. I can see why it would be good not to reveal little customs and rituals that are part of a community - that's is very much like revealing the contents of a present!

There are some things, as Yaatee pointed out, that really help a person discern. When I was at KE, the Prioress herself wasn't sure how much to reveal about certain penances to applicants. At first I was told that we NEVER discuss penances outside Carmel, and this made sense - she meant that I wasn't to write home to my family and say, 'Guess what, we whip ourselves three times a week!' This would have been shocking to them and very distressing because they had no basis for understanding the symbolic nature of the act. But she even asked my opinion about whether she should let applicants know this before they entered. My Novice Mistress told me that she didn't know until after she entered and she was shocked when her NM took her to her cell, gave her the discipline and explained what she had to do and when. When I entered, I was pretty sure that they did use the discipline because I had been in communication with someone who had entered there before, but I didn't know the particulars. I recommended to the Prioress that she discuss this with all new applicants so they wouldn't be shocked after their entrance and wonder if they had made the right decision - it is a pretty significant ritual that can't be ignored - views on this can be very polarised. It didn't bother me at all, but I knew that it would be a source of scandal to many (especially after the movie 'The Da Vinci Code'). Now, from what faith has posted, it seems that Mother is telling applicants this straight up. There is no shame about this practice, and the Church does allow it, but because it is controversial and contentious, it really needs to be disclosed up front to applicants. I still wouldn't write letters home about it because if even people discerning religious life don't feel comfortable with the practice, it's a sure bet that no good would come of discussing it with family or friends!

So why bring it up at all? Because those discerning religious life should know if the community they are going to enter does do this practice - before making a decision about entering. It just isn't everyone's 'cup of tea'.

I think, in some ways, the whole thing about the commodes might be another case in point. Some people might feel squeamish at the very idea and want to know such a thing before walking too far down the discernment path with that community. These things aren't the most important in the world, but they do matter to many people. So do things like washing with cold water from a bucket in the cell, or sleeping on straw with a beanbag pillow, no heating in the cells, washing the habit twice a year (under tunics every week) - oh the list goes on and on.

If one is choosing a penitential community, then perhaps these things not only don't matter, but they actually have an appeal to the romantic nature in us, but not everyone is called to the highly penitential life, or they consider that community life is penitential enough in its nature not to require extra penances! I can see the argument for both sides.

Anyway, I certainly haven't meant to offend anyone with my in depth posts, but this is the Vocation Station, and I guess I assume that those reading and posting here are genuinely interested in the different types of religious life and this is a place where we can share information. The really personal things can be shared by email of course, so if I do step over any invisible line, please just let me know. Not much shocks me, so I might not be as sensitive to others in this matter as I should be.

[Yaatee]

[size="3"]Of all the penances associated with religious life, I find those involving hygiene one of the hardest. When you read the old 'tell all's of women who left religious life in the 50s-70s, they tell appalling stories of the limitation on washing, presumably as a form of humiliation, but in view of what they wore and where they lived, without A/C--they were pretty appalling. One of my favorite communities that wore a neat period habit washed their crinolines once a year. The other repellent customs involved eating, when and where, mainly. I assumed that 'begging the soup' was a pre-WWII European custom until I read "Grace Before Meals" and found that it was also practiced in this country fairly recently.

I do recommend that anyone who enjoyed "The Nun's Story" movie also read the book. It's a real page-turner. I was not sorry that Luke left. She didn't belong, for one thing. She had entered for the wrong reason--her father had forbidden to let her marry her only love (history of mental illness in his family) and that started it. Then she was permitted by an unwary superior to become mainly a nurse and much less a religious. Then she had to deal with appalling trials in the Congo. Then she had to deal with supreme culture-shock returning to Belgium during the war, dealing with superior, at best spineless and at worst a Nazi sympathizer. The ending was foreordained. [/size]

[InPersonaChriste]

Is A nun's story fictional?

[AccountDeleted]

[quote name='InPersonaChriste' timestamp='1306379586' post='2246062']
Is A nun's story fictional?
[/quote]


Here's an excerpt from wikipedia
[url="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Nun"]http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Nun's_Story[/url]
Hulme wrote the book based partly upon the experiences of her friend, [url="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Marie_Louise_Habets"][color="#0645ad"]Marie Louise Habets[/color][/url] of the [url="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sisters_of_Charity_of_Jesus_and_Mary"][color="#0645ad"]Sisters of Charity of Jesus and Mary[/color][/url], a [url="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Belgium"][color="#0645ad"]Belgian[/color][/url] nurse and an ex-[url="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nun"][color="#0645ad"]nun[/color][/url] (it is often erroneously stated that the book was based upon Hulme's own experiences). The lead character of the book, Sister Luke (real name Gabrielle Van Der Mal), finds her faith tested in [url="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Africa"][color="#0645ad"]Africa[/color][/url] where she finds herself at odds with headstrong Dr. Fortunati, operator of a remote [url="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Belgian_Congo"][color="#0645ad"]Congo[/color][/url] hospital, with whom she gradually builds respect, and again during [url="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/World_War_II"][color="#0645ad"]World War II[/color][/url], when she is ordered not to take sides. Ultimately, Sister Luke is forced to decide whether to remain in the [url="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Convent"][color="#0645ad"]convent[/color][/url] or return to the outside world.

Gabrielle/Sister Luke is stretched between her desire to be faithful to the rule of her congregation and her desire to be a nurse. As a nun she must remove all vestiges of "Gabrielle Van Der Mal" and sublimate herself into the devoted bride of Christ. As a nun there is no room for her personal desires and aspirations. Ultimately, the conflict between her devotion to the Church and the nursing profession, juxtaposed with her passionate Belgian patriotism and her love of her father (killed by Nazi fighter planes while treating wounded) bring her to an impasse, which serves as the dénouement of the novel.

[Antigonos]

[quote name='InPersonaChriste' timestamp='1306379586' post='2246062']
Is A nun's story fictional?
[/quote]


Yes and no. From what I understand, the experiences of formation are accurately portrayed, but the crises Sr. Luke experienced were only similar to the time Marie Louise Habets was a Sister of Charity of Jesus and Mary. Undoubtedly she and her partner, Katherine Hulme, changed much in order to make the story more dramatic, but in the main it portrays many aspects of convent life of the time as it was.

[jkaands]

[quote name='Antigonos' timestamp='1306386395' post='2246105']
Yes and no. From what I understand, the experiences of formation are accurately portrayed, but the crises Sr. Luke experienced were only similar to the time Marie Louise Habets was a Sister of Charity of Jesus and Mary. Undoubtedly she and her partner, Katherine Hulme, changed much in order to make the story more dramatic, but in the main it portrays many aspects of convent life of the time as it was.
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I was thinking that perhaps she combined many dramatic episodes experienced by others. There are some real humdingers-- in the book, anyway.

[Totally Franciscan]

When I first saw The Nun's Story, it was right after I left my congregation. I remember thinking that although it was a true representation of many aspects of religious life, the one thing missing during her formation was JOY! I consider joy the hallmark of the Franciscan Order. No doubt most, if not all, congregations now realize the importance of joy in being a bride of Christ.