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Preparing To Leave...


Piccoli Fiori JMJ

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Piccoli Fiori JMJ

+JMJ

I was talking with Mother Abbess a few nights ago, and I realized how little I knew about what I needed to do before I would leave to enter the Monastery. I am assuming I will be there for the rest of my life, so what exactly do I need to do?

I figured I would need to close out online accounts for things I don't really need/use (although I may leave FB and PM). I know I need to thin out my belongings (also, what do I do with all my tech stuff?) I imagine most of my things I can leave with my sisters (since we share clothes all the time and she is the only one that pretty much uses the Wii now).

I'm sure there are many other things I need to prepare and get ready before I leave. I know some have gone through this process before, and I was hoping to get some advice or suggestions.

I will probably talk to Mother Abbess or the Novice Mistress again soon, and I will know what I have to do for them soon.

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[quote name='FutureNunJMJ' timestamp='1299163279' post='2217434']
+JMJ

I was talking with Mother Abbess a few nights ago, and I realized how little I knew about what I needed to do before I would leave to enter the Monastery. I am assuming I will be there for the rest of my life, so what exactly do I need to do?

I figured I would need to close out online accounts for things I don't really need/use (although I may leave FB and PM). I know I need to thin out my belongings (also, what do I do with all my tech stuff?) I imagine most of my things I can leave with my sisters (since we share clothes all the time and she is the only one that pretty much uses the Wii now).

I'm sure there are many other things I need to prepare and get ready before I leave. I know some have gone through this process before, and I was hoping to get some advice or suggestions.

I will probably talk to Mother Abbess or the Novice Mistress again soon, and I will know what I have to do for them soon.
[/quote]

Top of the marnin to ye :)

The general rule of thumb is, less is more. I would say the following should be good for starters:
1. a couple changes of clothes. They dont have to be fancy as they'll be covered by the habit anyway.
2. a pair or two of jeans or cargo pantaloons, for work pantaloons if you will be working in the garden or something
3. A Bible
4. A Rosary
4. A Prayer Book or two
5. A Notebook and pens
6. A Computer, preferably a laptop for space reasons
7. An open heart

if you can fit all that in one suitcase, you'll be great :)

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franciscanheart

[quote name='Staretz' timestamp='1299169352' post='2217456']
Top of the marnin to ye :)

The general rule of thumb is, less is more. I would say the following should be good for starters:
1. a couple changes of clothes. They dont have to be fancy as they'll be covered by the habit anyway.
2. a pair or two of jeans or cargo pantaloons, for work pantaloons if you will be working in the garden or something
3. A Bible
4. A Rosary
4. A Prayer Book or two
5. A Notebook and pens
6. A Computer, preferably a laptop for space reasons
7. An open heart

if you can fit all that in one suitcase, you'll be great :)
[/quote]
They let you take a computer? :huh:

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It is important that you have someone at home who can coordinate or take care of certain practical/money/legal issues for you when they arise. Giving someone power of attorney can cover this if it's complicated.

For instance, if you have a car that you are leaving behind, you'd have to sell it...or let a family member 'take care of it' for you for awhile and be in charge of renewing the registration and paying insurance and all of that.

You almost definitely want to put your parents' names on your bank account so they are able to access them, especially if there are bills that will come due after you leave. (I'm thinking about medical stuff.)

You'll want someone to mail your tax stuff to you so you can take care of that.....

Or whatever.

I don't know what you in particular will want to do, but a 'clean break' with your former life is not always easy to achieve. For one thing...while you may be entering 'for life', it's also as a postulant, which is still a time of discernment where you and the community are testing the waters as to whether or not you belong there. You...may be coming home. I'm not saying you should plan on it, but getting rid of everything may be a bigger sense of finality than is necessary. You can't take it with you, and you don't want to pay to put things in storage, but allowing family members to have things temporarily so that it could become permanent is probably a good way of handling things.

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Piccoli Fiori JMJ

[quote name='MithLuin' timestamp='1299185453' post='2217542']
I don't know what you in particular will want to do, but a 'clean break' with your former life is not always easy to achieve. For one thing...while you may be entering 'for life', it's also as a postulant, which is still a time of discernment where you and the community are testing the waters as to whether or not you belong there. You...may be coming home. I'm not saying you should plan on it, but getting rid of everything may be a bigger sense of finality than is necessary. You can't take it with you, and you don't want to pay to put things in storage, but allowing family members to have things temporarily so that it could become permanent is probably a good way of handling things.
[/quote]

I see what you are saying here. I understand the fact that the next few years are going to be further discernment from within the community. I am not getting rid of everything and leaving nothing behind me. I realize that I may be coming back.

I have my mother on all my bank accounts. I made sure of that when I opened them. My car is not really my own and I'm sure my sister will appreciate having a car to drive when she gets her license. I'm thinking of leaving instructions of some kind on what I want to happen to what is left behind if I am to be here forever.

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HopefulBride

[quote name='franciscanheart' timestamp='1299185162' post='2217538']
They let you take a computer? :huh:
[/quote]

I was going to ask that same question.

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HopefulBride

[quote name='FutureNunJMJ' timestamp='1299186829' post='2217564']
I see what you are saying here. I understand the fact that the next few years are going to be further discernment from within the community. I am not getting rid of everything and leaving nothing behind me. I realize that I may be coming back.

I have my mother on all my bank accounts. I made sure of that when I opened them. My car is not really my own and I'm sure my sister will appreciate having a car to drive when she gets her license. I'm thinking of leaving instructions of some kind on what I want to happen to what is left behind if I am to be here forever.
[/quote]

I see Mith's point. You might want to check with Mother Abbess on her suggestion on handling that. In my community the sisters are advised not to get rid of anything (bank accounts, homes etc... ) until right before final vows. Perhaps as the time approaches, you might be allowed a bit more leeway in communication with family and even the bank as far as wrapping things up. You might consider signing a POA over to your mother or your sister when the time of you final vows approach.

This is so[size="7"] exciting!!!![/size] [size="7"]:w00t:[/size]

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MissScripture

[quote name='FutureNunJMJ' timestamp='1299186829' post='2217564']
I see what you are saying here. I understand the fact that the next few years are going to be further discernment from within the community. I am not getting rid of everything and leaving nothing behind me. I realize that I may be coming back.

I have my mother on all my bank accounts. I made sure of that when I opened them. My car is not really my own and I'm sure my sister will appreciate having a car to drive when she gets her license. I'm thinking of leaving instructions of some kind on what I want to happen to what is left behind if I am to be here forever.
[/quote]
My sister gave me any clothes that fit me, and the rest I will donate. And she also bought gifts for people for the first year, and quite a stock pile of things for her Goddaughter, that she has instructed my mom when to give to her. Some things she left at home and then later asked my parents to send (such as games and knitting stuff). She donated a bunch of her books (of the novel variety) but left her religious books at home for my parents. All her movies and CDs were just absorbed into my parents' collection or given to people who liked them, or else donated. Other things, like her religious statues that she couldn't bring or the 6 dozen rosaries she has, she left and will give (or tell my mom to give) to her nieces and nephews, should she have any. But as a side note, from a friend who went to a convent and didn't stay --don't get rid of all your clothes right away. She came back home and all she had was a pair of pantaloons and 2 shirts...

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Catherine Therese

Its probably worth arranging for someone you trust (a parent, sibling or close friend?) to be assigned power of attorney. Basically this is just in case you may have forgotten to close out an account or you may have other affairs that slip your mind as you prepare to enter. This is a nice catch-all... once you've done all you can, you entrust someone else to act on your behalf in the event that anything unexpected comes up. That way, you don't get disturbed or pulled away from your new life to tie off loose ends.

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  • 2 weeks later...

Part of it depends on how old you are. I was only 18, and if you're very young like that you probably don't have credit cards to worry about etc., -- whatever you do have, leave all of your passwords and personal information, taxes, credit cards, etc., in the hands of someone very trustworthy. You obviously understand that this may or may not be where you'll be for the rest of your life, so this person needs to know what to do with those things if you do end up remaining in religious life, and be ready to hand them back over to you if you don't. I wouldn't be too stingy about giving away your mundane stuff though, because even if you come back you probably won't regret being free from it. The only thing I regretted not having when I came back was my music collection -- I have away dozens of CD's I would have liked to have back (back in the day when CD's meant something, haha).

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[quote name='franciscanheart' timestamp='1300426395' post='2221507']
I know this isn't the right place but...

TOTUS TUUS! :yahoo: You're back!!
[/quote]

LOL! I don't have a lot of time to do anything but lurk but I'm sick right now so... Good to see you guys :)

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franciscanheart

[quote name='Totus Tuus' timestamp='1300480282' post='2221581']
LOL! I don't have a lot of time to do anything but lurk but I'm sick right now so... Good to see you guys :)
[/quote]
Good to see you! :) Thanks for sharing.

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  • 1 year later...

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