Homosexuals Adopting

[tinytherese]

[quote name='kujo' timestamp='1299216701' post='2217748']
Sure.

And before you walk me through the whole "homosexuality is wrong" stuff, let me stop you. You can be a heterosexual couple with absolutely ZERO morals. Would you rather have a homosexual couple who believes that Christ is their savior and who teaches their children to love and serve Him, or a straight couple who believes you should cutoff old ladies in traffic, and flick boogers and AIDS patients?

All I'm saying is that certain collections of genitals don't predispose you to being a better parent.
[/quote]

Yet the homosexual couple is going against the Gospel by living the life they do. A man or a woman who lives out a homosexual life style is going against masculinity and feminity.



What do you all think of this?

What's wrong with gay couples adopting kids?
Countless studies testify to the fact that children who are raised without a father and mother have a considerably harder time in life. Problems range from an increase in criminal behavior to substance abuse and psychological problems. Having two “parents” of the same gender does not resolve many of these difficulties. For example, if a child is adopted by gay parents, how will he or she have a healthy understanding of fatherhood and motherhood? The child will have a natural desire for a father or mother, but will have a difficult time expressing that without feeling ungrateful. The child may even feel guilty for desiring that.

Rosie O'Donnell adopted a son, and was asked what she'd do if he wanted a dad. She replied that when he was six, he said, "I want to have a daddy." Her answer to that was, "If you were to have a daddy, you wouldn't have me as a mommy because I'm the kind of mommy who wants another mommy. This is the way mommy got born." He said, "OK, I'll just keep you."[1]

The son was made to feel that if he wanted a dad, he'd be rejecting her. She also shared that her son now knows that "There are different types of people; that he grew up in another lady's tummy, and that God looked inside and saw there was a mix-up and that God brought him to me." In other words, God doesn't want him to have a dad.

One case of a boy adopted by a gay couple was published in the American Journal of Orthopsychiatry. In the article, entitled "Recreating Mother," it explained that the one of the dads hired nannies to care for him, but fired them when he became too attached. This happened three times, and he was seeing a therapist for his psychological problems by the age of four because he wanted to "buy" a mom.[2]

Elsewhere, in The New York Times Magazine, a success story was told of a pair of sisters who were raised by a lesbian couple. However, one sister admitted that at the age of 16, she wrote "I cannot understand or relate to men because I am so immersed in gay culture and unfamiliar with what it is to have a straight relationship."[3]

Just because a couple is heterosexual, this does not mean that they have a right to adopt. Plenty of homosexual men would probably be caring fathers, and plenty of heterosexual men are dead-beat dads. But every child deserves a mom and a dad. This is not some dreamy ideal, but is the way our bodies have been made, and should be the goal of any healthy civilization. The impact of a mother in her family is unrepeatable, and the same can be said of the father. Two moms don't make a dad, and two dads do not equal a mom. This is the way nature has designed it. If homosexual men were supposed to be able to have kids with each other, they'd be designed that way. The same goes for two women. This may seem simplistic, but it is nature's design, and I firmly believe that things were created a certain way for a reason. For evidence, click here.

When considering the topic of adoption for a heterosexual or homosexual couple, the top priority must be the well-being of the child, above and beyond the desires or “rights” of the potential parents. If the family situation will not be a stable one, it is a grave reason to prohibit the adoption. In his book, Sexual Ecology: AIDS and the Destiny of Gay Men, the homosexual author, Gabriel Rotello wrote, "We have an agenda to create a society in which homosexuality is regarded as healthy, natural, and normal. To me that is the most important agenda item."[4] Tim Dailey, of the Family Research Council concurs, saying "Homosexual activists attempt to portray their lifestyle as normal and healthy, and insist that homosexual relationships are the equivalent in every way to their heterosexual counterparts. Hollywood and the media relentlessly propagate the image of the fit, healthy, and well-adjusted homosexual."[5]

But is this the case? Homosexual partnerships tend to be unstable. For example, a study of 156 homosexual men (who were in relationships lasting between 1 and 37 years) discovered that none of the men who were in relationships longer than five years had been faithful to each other.[6] Yet another researcher found that the average cohabiting homosexual relationship lasts less than three years.[7] Besides higher rates of infidelity and separation, homosexual relationships also tend to involve more abuse, health problems, as well as drug and alcohol abuse. For more on this, click here and here.

To sum up these findings, Tim Dailey wrote, "Debilitating illness, chronic disease, psychological problems, and early death suffered by homosexuals is the legacy of this tragically misguided activism, which puts the furthering of an 'agenda' above saving the lives of those whose interests they purport to represent. Those who advocate full acceptance of homosexual behavior choose to downplay the growing and incontrovertible evidence regarding the serious, life-threatening health effects associated with the homosexual lifestyle. Homosexual advocacy groups have a moral duty to disseminate medical information that might dissuade individuals from entering or continuing in an inherently unhealthy and dangerous lifestyle. Education officials in particular have a duty to provide information regarding the negative health effects of homosexuality to students in their charge, whose very lives are put at risk by engaging in such behavior. Above all, civil society itself has an obligation to institute policies that promote the health and well-being of its citizens."[8]

When it comes to gay couples adopting kids, every child has a right to have parents, but not every adult has a right to have a child.
______________
[1]. “ABC Primetime Thursday” interview with Diane Sawyer (March 14, 2002).
[2]. Eisold, B K “Recreating Mother,” The American Journal of Orthopsychiatry 68:3 (July 1998), 433-42
[3]. Susan Dominus, “Growing Up With Mom and Mom," The New York Times Magazine (October 24, 2004).
[4]. Gabriel Rotello, Quoted in Sexual Ecology: AIDS and the Destiny of Gay Men, (New York: Penguin Books, 1997), p. 286.
[5]. Family Research Council, Monday, "The Negative Health Effects of Homosexuality," Tim Daily, October 13, 2003.
[6]. David P. McWhirter and Andrew M. Mattison, The Male Couple: How Relationships Develop (Englewood Cliffs, New Jersey: Prentice-Hall, 1984), pp. 252, 3.
[7]. M. Saghir and E. Robins, Male and Female Homosexuality (Baltimore: Williams and Wilkins, 1973), 225; L.A. Peplau and H. Amaro, "Understanding Lesbian Relationships," in Homosexuality: Social, Psychological, and Biological Issues edited by J. Weinrich and W. Paul (Beverly Hills: Sage, 1982).
[8]. Family Research Council, Monday, "The Negative Health Effects of Homosexuality," Tim Daily, October 13, 2003.

source http://www.chastity.com/chastity-qa/homosexuality/homosexuality/whats-wrong-with-gay

[kujo]

[quote name='tinytherese' timestamp='1299217368' post='2217752']
Yet the homosexual couple is going against the Gospel by living the life they do. A man or a woman who lives out a homosexual life style is going against masculinity and feminity.
[/quote]

Again, does a "proper" sexual orientation guarantee that your kids will grow up to be good people? Is it possible for heterosexual parents to raise shoddy kids?

[quote]
What do you all think of this?

What's wrong with gay couples adopting kids?
...
source http://www.chastity.com/chastity-qa/homosexuality/homosexuality/whats-wrong-with-gay
[/quote]


Well, for starters, I wouldn't universalize the experience of Rosie O'Donnell's son and the horrible way that she explained herself to him.

Secondly, I'd be skeptical of an article that talks about studies of any group without clearly defining the characteristics of the group in question; sure, they were "homosexual men," but from where? What was their age? How were they selected? I'd also take the time to look at similar studies that might have found confirming or divergent evidence, and compare these to the data garnered from studies of heterosexual couples.

Thirdly, I'd contest the notion that you need a mom and a dad who live in the same house in order to be raised properly. Sure, that is preferable, as is a loving family with a healthy financial situation, a home that allows the child space to live and play safely, both indoors and out. It wouldn't hurt to go to fine schools, have a balanced diet, be exposed to the arts and the need to serve the less fortunate in the community. A firm sense of justice--both moral and ethical-- ought to be instilled from early childhood, as well as the inherent equality of everyone who is loved by God. But these things don't guarantee or even correlate with becoming a "good" or "moral" person. Serial killers and pedophiles come from loving heterosexual families, too! So clearly there's some sort of underlying thing that has to be there and which has nothing to do with what gender your parents are.

Finally, I'd call into question terms like "stable" and "harder time in life." What do they mean, operationally? Are there certain quantifiable elements that can be used as benchmarks? Or are these just normative terms that are loaded and cannot be operationalized in any meaningful way?

[Mr.Cat]

As a serious question, would the Church ([i]people here[/i]) also oppose atheists adopting children?

[kujo]

This is from the other thread having to do with this topic:

[quote name='kujo' timestamp='1299214452' post='2217738']
And some Christians seem to think that if you are a homosexual who is in a committed, stable, loving relationship, who is not for the murder of babies, doesn't believe that any "agenda" about homosexuality ought to be "pressed" on anybody, doesn't support destroying the sanctity of marriage, isn't in favor of throwing children in front of TV's all day, and doesn't practice or support the sort of illicit sexual practices you speak of...then you are still NOT suitable to be a parent.

Of course, those same Christians would prefer a child to be adopted by a chain-smoking Pentacostal heterosexual couple who goes to church twice a year and who supports their family through the father's work as member of a predatory bank who gives out high-interest loans to impoverished minorities who will certainly have to default a few years down the road. Ya know, because it's all about having the right genitalia.
[/quote]

What say ye?

[Nihil Obstat]

[quote name='kujo' timestamp='1299217049' post='2217750']
Is that grace absent from a family who suffers a divorce? Have I been shortchanged in the grace department because my parents are no longer together? Does that make me less of a person?
[/quote]
Well your parents sure were deprived of the graces of marriage.
We have sacraments for a reason, do we not? What do you consider to be the point of marriage?