Faithful heart Posted April 22, 2004 Share Posted April 22, 2004 I was watching a show last night about a girl in India. She was married to her husband and had 3 children. Her last labor was hard and her midwife told her she would have to come up with money to go to the hopital. She or her family could not. The birth was not good, but the girl and her baby servived. The girl does not want to have any more children, she said she could barly feed the ones she has now. The girl's husband said she must have another child, so did her mother-in- law. An "educated" Indian woman was trying to explain birth control to this family but the husband and mother-in-law were not having any part of it. I don't think that NFP would be an answer because I don't think the husband would be apart of it. The woman told the girl privatly that she could get birth control and take it without her family knowing. What do you think about situations like this? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Matty_boy Posted April 22, 2004 Share Posted April 22, 2004 i think the woman needs to stick to her guns. her soul is way more important than her husbands sex drive. NFP is the way to go. Contraception makes abortion necessary because contraception dictates a lack of openness to life. thus when a woman gets pregnant and is on birth control, she is more open to abortion because of that lack of openness to life. plaus, the abstaining from sex is an exercise in restraint for the purpose of love for your spouse. it builds a stronger bond. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ironmonk Posted April 22, 2004 Share Posted April 22, 2004 NFP is not birth control. Birth control is evil. She should rely on God, not things of this world. God Bless, ironmonk Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
homeschoolmom Posted April 22, 2004 Share Posted April 22, 2004 not to dismiss your point, matty_boy, but i highly doubt that a young indian girl is going to be able to tell her husband when he's going to have to keep his hands off. i am not suggesting she go on the pill, but i don't think it's as simple as "sticking to her guns"... her options (probably, based on the information in the post): 1. go on the pill and avoid pregnancy (not a great choice) 2. attempt to avoid sex and future pregancies w/o the consent of her husband... (not likely to be successful) 3. pray for a miracle... sad situation all around... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ironmonk Posted April 22, 2004 Share Posted April 22, 2004 (edited) [quote name='homeschoolmom' date='Apr 22 2004, 09:43 AM'] not to dismiss your point, matty_boy, but i highly doubt that a young indian girl is going to be able to tell her husband when he's going to have to keep his hands off. i am not suggesting she go on the pill, but i don't think it's as simple as "sticking to her guns"... her options (probably, based on the information in the post): 1. go on the pill and avoid pregnancy (not a great choice) 2. attempt to avoid sex and future pregancies w/o the consent of her husband... (not likely to be successful) 3. pray for a miracle... sad situation all around... [/quote] "not a great choice"... it's evil. The Church teaches that it's evil - as seen in scripture. It produces an abortion, it does not prevent conception. God Bless, ironmonk Edited April 22, 2004 by ironmonk Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
homeschoolmom Posted April 22, 2004 Share Posted April 22, 2004 [quote name='ironmonk' date='Apr 22 2004, 07:51 AM'] "not a great choice"... it's evil. The Church teaches that it's evil - as seen in scripture. It produces an abortion, it does not prevent conception. God Bless, ironmonk [/quote] okay, i'll go along with that (I'm trying to keep my kiddos from killing each other! not paying too close attention to detail)... it's evil... It is still a very sad situation-- one i wish young girls worldwide did not find themselves in! If the husband cared about his wife's health and wellbeing instead of thinking only of himself, nfp would be a wonderful God-honoring solution.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Faithful heart Posted April 22, 2004 Author Share Posted April 22, 2004 I know the church thinks all birth control is evil. In my situation, I have a caring loving husband who respects the me, the church and NFP. By the way we are three months pregnant with are third child, I just don't understand what a woman in this situation would do? Her husband is not going to let her tell him when he can make love. Her children now don't have enough to eat. I agree she should pray, I agree with the church, but I am having a hard time with these kind of situations. My Aunt who is a nurse told me that a woman was having her ninth child, the woman was very depressed and in alot of pain. The doctors and nurses were trying to tell her husband that the woman needs a hysrorestamy (sp?) and if she gets pregnant again she may not live through it. The husband told them we will not stop untill I have another son. He refused to let his wife have the operation. The wife listened to her husband. What does the church say about this? I am not trying to get anyone to say birth control is ok. I am just having a hard time figuring this out. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ironmonk Posted April 22, 2004 Share Posted April 22, 2004 [quote name='Faithful heart' date='Apr 22 2004, 10:06 AM'] I know the church thinks all birth control is evil. In my situation, I have a caring loving husband who respects the me, the church and NFP. By the way we are three months pregnant with are third child, I just don't understand what a woman in this situation would do? Her husband is not going to let her tell him when he can make love. Her children now don't have enough to eat. I agree she should pray, I agree with the church, but I am having a hard time with these kind of situations. My Aunt who is a nurse told me that a woman was having her ninth child, the woman was very depressed and in alot of pain. The doctors and nurses were trying to tell her husband that the woman needs a hysrorestamy (sp?) and if she gets pregnant again she may not live through it. The husband told them we will not stop untill I have another son. He refused to let his wife have the operation. The wife listened to her husband. What does the church say about this? I am not trying to get anyone to say birth control is ok. I am just having a hard time figuring this out. [/quote] The problem is we don't know if the husband will not listen. It's pure speculation. I think the husband would listen because NFP is not birth control. Proponents of birth control make everything sound worse than it is. There is a lot of money involved with birth control. She doesn't have to "Tell" him, she can simple talk to him and ask... reason goes a long way... especially with loved ones. The statement is loaded. [quote][u][b]I don't think [/b][/u]that NFP would be an answer because I don't think the husband would be apart of it. The woman told the girl privatly that she could get birth control and take it without her family knowing. What do you think about situations like this? [/quote] It's wrong of them to offer her birth control because she is part of a family, and they need to stop FORCING their beliefs in birth control on other people. Birth control opens the door to adultery and infantcide. The situation as listed is loaded and unfounded. We must rely on God, NOT this world. The godless want you to rely on the world because that pulls you away from God. God Bless, ironmonk Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cmotherofpirl Posted April 22, 2004 Share Posted April 22, 2004 If she goes on the pill her husband will eventually catch on there are no more children. I doubt if he will be nice about it, when he finds out. NFP would be a good option. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
homeschoolmom Posted April 22, 2004 Share Posted April 22, 2004 [quote name='ironmonk' date='Apr 22 2004, 08:31 AM'] She doesn't have to "Tell" him, she can simple talk to him and ask... reason goes a long way... especially with loved ones. [/quote] You're assuming that they are, in fact, "loved ones." In arranged marriages, this is not always the case. Of course, I don't know... they very well might be. It's hard to speculate. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
homeschoolmom Posted April 22, 2004 Share Posted April 22, 2004 [quote name='cmotherofpirl' date='Apr 22 2004, 08:34 AM'] If she goes on the pill her husband will eventually catch on there are no more children. I doubt if he will be nice about it, when he finds out. NFP would be a good option. [/quote] I don't see how any effort to avoid pregnancy is going to be good. If the husband in this scenario wants another boy, then pregnancy is the goal not something to be avoided... therefore, I can't see how he is going to go for nfp. I am not trying to belabor the point, but I still think it is a sad situation all around. The only thing that will help this girl is a miracle. I'm sure that if I'm in error, Ironmonk will correct me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ironmonk Posted April 22, 2004 Share Posted April 22, 2004 [quote name='homeschoolmom' date='Apr 22 2004, 10:52 AM'] You're assuming that they are, in fact, "loved ones." In arranged marriages, this is not always the case. Of course, I don't know... they very well might be. It's hard to speculate. [/quote] Believe it or not, India is in the 20th century. I've had to study it recently in a Religion class because of Hinduism, Jainism, Budhaism, etc... Not to many arranged marriages anymore... if I remember correctly. The point is that she should at least try. It kills me everytime someone lets worrying stop them from trying. If someone does not try to rectify the situation, then they have no right to complain. The bottom line is that there is no acceptable use of birth control in the situation given. God Bless, ironmonk Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PedroX Posted April 22, 2004 Share Posted April 22, 2004 monk, I am in agreement with 90% of what you have said. A few points to ponder though India still engages in many, many arranged marriages. I have even worked with professionals whose parents back in India have arranged marriages for them. In the lower classes this is all the more prevalent. While the prohibition on birthcontrol is an aboslute truth, God's laws work best when all of them are being followed at once. In this case, the husband needs to love his wife as Christ loves the Church. It is evident that he is not doing this. This failure is what leads to an APPARENT conflict of birth control. You are absolutely right about worry stopping us from trying, but how would you explain this (prohibition of birht control) to a Hindu Woman? peace... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
homeschoolmom Posted April 22, 2004 Share Posted April 22, 2004 Very well said, PedroX... much better than I was able to. (Must that river)... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ironmonk Posted April 22, 2004 Share Posted April 22, 2004 [quote name='PedroX' date='Apr 22 2004, 12:16 PM'] monk, I am in agreement with 90% of what you have said. A few points to ponder though India still engages in many, many arranged marriages. I have even worked with professionals whose parents back in India have arranged marriages for them. In the lower classes this is all the more prevalent. While the prohibition on birthcontrol is an aboslute truth, God's laws work best when all of them are being followed at once. In this case, the husband needs to love his wife as Christ loves the Church. It is evident that he is not doing this. This failure is what leads to an APPARENT conflict of birth control. You are absolutely right about worry stopping us from trying, but how would you explain this (prohibition of birht control) to a Hindu Woman? peace... [/quote] Easily... They have a very high regard for life. The pill for use as birth control is against the Hindu faiths. Anyway, the issue is not how to explain it to them... the issue is what we think of it. God Bless, ironmonk Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Create an account or sign in to comment
You need to be a member in order to leave a comment
Create an account
Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!
Register a new accountSign in
Already have an account? Sign in here.
Sign In Now