add Posted February 1, 2011 Share Posted February 1, 2011 I've got 5 brothers and 3 sisters, 1 mom, all my siblings born within 10 years my mom was a stay at home mom and happy Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cmotherofpirl Posted February 2, 2011 Share Posted February 2, 2011 [quote name='Lil Red' timestamp='1296593523' post='2207513'] and to add, cherie, it depends on what a person views as a 'necessity'. [/quote] not always Red, in our case if my mum hadn't worked as a catholic school teacher, we would have been on the street. Even with her salary we could barely afford food.[quote name='apparently' timestamp='1296603923' post='2207571'] I've got 5 brothers and 3 sisters, 1 mom, all my siblings born within 10 years my mom was a stay at home mom and happy [/quote] Lovely if you can afford it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
add Posted February 2, 2011 Share Posted February 2, 2011 [quote name='cmotherofpirl' timestamp='1296606163' post='2207587'] Lovely if you can afford it. [/quote] sarcasm? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cmotherofpirl Posted February 2, 2011 Share Posted February 2, 2011 [quote name='apparently' timestamp='1296608014' post='2207595'] sarcasm? [/quote] honesty. Its a goal but not a reality for many people. They simply can't make enough money to put food on the table and pay car insurence, mortgage or rent, and utilities to make it on one income. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lil Red Posted February 2, 2011 Share Posted February 2, 2011 [quote name='cmotherofpirl' timestamp='1296606163' post='2207587']not always Red, in our case if my mum hadn't worked as a catholic school teacher, we would have been on the street. Even with her salary we could barely afford food.[/quote] i speak more of those families that believe cable/internet is a necessity, or the latest newest cars, or high-end electronics, etc. etc. ad nauseum. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sarah147 Posted February 2, 2011 Share Posted February 2, 2011 [quote name='Lil Red' timestamp='1296610485' post='2207609'] i speak more of those families that believe cable/internet is a necessity, or the latest newest cars, or high-end electronics, etc. etc. ad nauseum. [/quote] I think internet is important; the other things, not so important. Also, things like eating out a lot, big vacations, pricey clothes, name brand items, etc. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CatherineM Posted February 2, 2011 Share Posted February 2, 2011 I wish that my mom had worked. We really struggled financially. She worked off and on doing things like hair dressing, and catering, but she wasn't very healthy, so couldn't work full time. It was especially hard when my dad was off work after he had a heart attack. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ed Normile Posted February 2, 2011 Share Posted February 2, 2011 I have only ever seen stay at home mums, I guess the ones in a pot could be prtable but the ones we put in the ground always stay right there! A fine example of stay at home mums. [img]http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3524/3924846996_e82b6491c9.jpg[/img] ed Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
add Posted February 2, 2011 Share Posted February 2, 2011 (edited) [quote name='CatherineM' timestamp='1296613325' post='2207630'] [b][color="#ff0000"]** I wish that my mom had worked.[/color][/b] We really struggled financially. She worked off and on doing things like hair dressing, and catering, but she wasn't very healthy, so couldn't work full time. It was especially hard when my dad was off work after he had a heart attack. [/quote] just because you are a stay at home mom doesn't mean you don't work. [b][color="#ff0000"]**[/color][/b] what a ridiculous statement. Edited February 2, 2011 by apparently Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ClareOfAssisi Posted February 2, 2011 Share Posted February 2, 2011 [quote name='apparently' timestamp='1296639057' post='2207710'] just because you are a stay at home mom doesn't mean you don't work. [b][color="#ff0000"]**[/color][/b] what a ridiculous statement. [/quote] I think CatherineM is saying that she wishes her mother had had a full time job which would have eased their financial difficulties. That is not to say that SAHMs do not work. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rachael Posted February 2, 2011 Share Posted February 2, 2011 [quote name='cmotherofpirl' timestamp='1296606163' post='2207587'] not always Red, in our case if my mum hadn't worked as a catholic school teacher, we would have been on the street. Even with her salary we could barely afford food. Lovely if you can afford it. [/quote] My grandmother worked as a nurse for a while and then eventually as a school bus driver to be bring in $$$, but still be around the 8 children. You have to do what you have to do... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CatherineM Posted February 2, 2011 Share Posted February 2, 2011 I was a SAHM. Not by choice, but by disability. I know SAHMs work. I was the only one in the apartment complex, so I did things the other moms couldn't, especially in the afternoon when the latchkey kids needed owies taken care of. Most were single moms, so they didn't have a choice either. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lilllabettt Posted February 2, 2011 Share Posted February 2, 2011 (edited) I am a radical I guess. But I don't view this as a moral issue. And I don't see stay-at-home motherhood as the universal ideal ... what I mean is, even if you can afford it, that doesn't mean you should do it. Working outside doesn't have to be something women do only if they "have no choice." Maybe they want to. Maybe that is whats best for them and their family. There are trade-offs either way. Every family is different and the cost-benefit analysis will be different. For me, the #1 issue is education. Whether or not a girl plans to be a stay-at home mom, she should learn how to do "domestic" things. I have wished a million times I knew how to sew. And cook. And whether or not they plan to be SAHMs, all women should be well-read and educated to the highest level their intellect will allow. Even if a formal degree isn't possible ... there is a good education to be had reading the classics at the library... If a girl doesn't take to book learning then she needs to know a trade of some kind. Besides the fact that learning is good for its own sake, and allows a girl to really enjoy life to the fullest ... things happen: The marriage becomes abusive. Or the breadwinner gets sick. The breadwinner wants a divorce. The breadwinner dies. My best friend's dad, age 45, recently took a nap on the couch and never woke up. His wife, mother of five, has no degree, knows no trade, had no outside work experience for 20 yrs, and now has to support the family. I always think of "cheaper by the dozen," where the mom had to support 12 kids, fighting all the while to be taken seriously as a woman in the workforce. I think part of being a responsible parent is making sure you can provide for your children no matter what happens Edited February 2, 2011 by Lilllabettt Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
add Posted February 3, 2011 Share Posted February 3, 2011 (edited) [quote name='ClareOfAssisi' timestamp='1296653719' post='2207720'] I think CatherineM is saying that she wishes her mother had had a full time job which would have eased their financial difficulties. That is not to say that SAHMs do not work. [/quote] i know what she said and i don't mean to be rude, but, my point is money isn't everything. Quality time or family togetherness is valuable too. it is difficult for me to put what i,m saying into words --- being poor financially does not necessarily mean "poor in spirit" or something like that Edited February 3, 2011 by apparently Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lil Red Posted February 3, 2011 Share Posted February 3, 2011 when it makes a difference between actually feeding or clothing or heating your children....yeah, having two parents working (or in some cases, a single parent who works multiple jobs) is a necessity. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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