Talking About Closed Communion

[Luigi]

"The person who goes up anyway knows very well how I feel because we have discussed it, but I still feel I'm sinning by letting it happen in front of me..." YOU aren't responsible for another person's decision - you may be feeling anguish or something, but please don't feel like you're sinning.

In my area, the priest will usually make a brief announcement just before Communion. At a wedding it might run something to the effect of: "We welcome all of Alice's and Bill's friends and family to this celebration of their marriage. We welcome all Catholics who are in a state of grace to receive the Eucharist, the most holy sacrament of the Church. Non-Catholics are asked to fold their arms across their chest and receive a blessing." The non-Catholics know who they are; separated Catholics are usually with a relative who will turn to them at this point and give them a knowing stare. Some of the non-Catholics may be offended, but the rules are being defined by the priest, the presider, the guy in charge of the whole operation (they may not know the right term but they can tell he's the guy in charge).

And of course it can be customized to a funeral or other service.

[MissyP89]

[quote name='Luigi' timestamp='1294982528' post='2199965']
"The person who goes up anyway knows very well how I feel because we have discussed it, but I still feel I'm sinning by letting it happen in front of me..." YOU aren't responsible for another person's decision - you may be feeling anguish or something, but please don't feel like you're sinning.[/quote]

Oh, sure, there are a lot of emotions there, especially because that person is someone very close to my heart. But I thought that by not saying "You really should go to Confession before receiving," on each occasion we're together would be an omission on my part. If I spoke up, she probably wouldn't go...but would probably never come back to Mass, either. It's a very fragile situation that could use a lot of prayer.

Edited January 14, 2011 by MissyP89

[Archaeology cat]

It's a hard situation. A SIL asked me before my wedding Mass how Catholics receive (she's Methodist), and I explained, and my husband chimed in that only Catholics can receive and that receiving denotes that you are in communion with the Catholic Church, that it isn't to be mean or anything. Our priest also mentioned it, since he knew that I was a convert and therefore most of the guests were not Catholic. She didn't take it well, but c'est la vie.

[Chamomile]

[quote name='CatherineM' timestamp='1294979024' post='2199948']
When I get the question why? I just explain that is what the word communion means. If you are in communion with the church, you can receive. If you aren't in communion, you can't until you are.
[/quote]




As a convert, this would've been the most convincing argument to me. And I would think most people who aren't Catholic, or are fallen-away, are that way because they don't agree with the Catholic Church and therefore don't want to be associated with it.

You can go further with this and say that by receiving Holy Communion in a Catholic Church without being in communion with the Church, you are essentially lying to God and everyone present - you are saying you agree with the Church's teachings and are in a state of grace.

As other people pointed out, show reverence for Our Eucharistic Lord with your speech, as this will help them to see that something more than just symbolic is happening. E.g. - say "Holy Communion" instead of just communion, reference receiving Our Lord's Body and Blood, talk about the Holy Sacrifice of the Mass.

I don't mean to turn this into a debate, but I doubt we would have this problem (or it wouldn't be as common) if, at all Masses, it was still the norm to to kneel and receive Our Lord at an altar rail... I think this silently demonstrates how holy the Eucharist is and how unworthy we are to receive it. I don't think people from other denominations would be as willing to kneel and receive as a child from the priest something they see as only a symbol.

[vee]

The way Ive explained it to non Catholics and non Christians is "members only." Yes like an exclusive golf club etc but membership has its privileges as well as its rights and responsibilities.

[SoonerCatholic]

Usually in my experience, the priests will make a brief announcement before communion if the Mass is on an occasion where there is potentially a lot of non-Catholics present, like Christmas or 1st Communions or weddings. Additionally, at my Catholic high-school there were a lot of non-Catholic students, and during school Masses, they would usually come forward with their arms crossed for a blessing.

My mom had a friend who was in RCIA and was very close to becoming Catholic, but she couldn't quite understand closed communion. Her husband and daughter were not Catholic and were not planning to be, so she felt uncomfortable that even if she brought them to Mass with her, they would not be able to receive. While I am sure there were other reasons for her decision, it was quite sad to see her come so close and not go through with it.

[vee]

When saying "members only" though I make sure to relate it to something the person can relate to like sports. One cant simply be a spectator at a baseball or football game and decide "hey I want to play too" and run out onto the field. You have to join the team, get some training and instruction, get the proper equipment etc. For a non Catholic seeing Team Catholic going to receive the Eucharist is like watching the winning team celebrate and they want to join in too but they cant because they didnt do anything! Id ask the person if they think that just because they are a hockey fan and their favorite team won the Stanley Cup does that make them worthy to go drink from the cup with the players??? for Catholics who arent in a state of grace its like being sidelined due to illness, once you get better (by going to the Divine Physician in Confession) you can get back into the game.

[HisChildForever]

I think one has to be more specific than "members only" though, because in that case, [u]any[/u] Catholic would feel welcome or even entitled to receive. "Members only" would work in certain cases - if the individual is not a Catholic Christian or not a Christian period - because it makes it simple to explain. But to be safe, instead of "members only" the announcement should state "those Catholics who are in full conformity with the Church and in a state of grace". If this were a formal announcement made by the priest that would be the best and safest bet. A one-on-one, like I mentioned earlier, would be different.

[dominicansoul]

[quote name='vee8' timestamp='1295023932' post='2200057']
When saying "members only" though I make sure to relate it to something the person can relate to like sports. One cant simply be a spectator at a baseball or football game and decide "hey I want to play too" and run out onto the field. You have to join the team, get some training and instruction, get the proper equipment etc. For a non Catholic seeing Team Catholic going to receive the Eucharist is like watching the winning team celebrate and they want to join in too but they cant because they didnt do anything! Id ask the person if they think that just because they are a hockey fan and their favorite team won the Stanley Cup does that make them worthy to go drink from the cup with the players??? for Catholics who arent in a state of grace its like being sidelined due to illness, once you get better (by going to the Divine Physician in Confession) you can get back into the game.
[/quote]
what in the world are you talking about?

[vee]

[quote name='HisChildForever' timestamp='1295029230' post='2200078']
the announcement should state "those Catholics who are in full conformity with the Church and in a state of grace". If this were a formal announcement made by the priest that would be the best and safest bet. A one-on-one, like I mentioned earlier, would be different.
[/quote]

Agreed.

[vee]

[quote name='dominicansoul' timestamp='1295032334' post='2200091']
what in the world are you talking about?
[/quote]

I have no idea! I just like to hear myself type... and include random pics
[img]http://espn.go.com/photo/2009/0430/nhl_g_avery1_sw_300.jpg[/img]

Edited January 14, 2011 by vee8

[Chamomile]

In hoping to attend a Byzantine liturgy soon, I was reading up on what it's like before I go. And I came across this information from a page about things a person wished they knew before going to an Orthodox service (so somewhat similar in worship).

I found it very wise how they explained the reservation of Holy Communion to certain people, and also the use of blessed bread:


[color="#212121"][font="calluna-1, calluna-2, serif"][size="2"]

[quote]Only Orthodox may take communion, but anyone may have some of the blessed bread. Here's how it works: the round communion loaf, baked by a parishioner, is imprinted with a seal. In the preparation service before the Liturgy, the priest cuts out a section of the seal and sets it aside; it is called the "Lamb". The rest of the bread is cut up and placed in a large basket, and blessed by the priest.

During the eucharistic prayer, the Lamb is consecrated to be the Body of Christ, and the chalice of wine is consecrated as His Blood. Here's the surprising part: the priest places the "Lamb" in the chalice with the wine. When we receive communion, we file up to the priest, standing and opening our mouths wide while he gives us a fragment of the wine-soaked bread from a golden spoon. He also prays over us, calling us by our first name or the saint-name which we chose when we were baptized or chrismated (received into the church by anointing with blessed oil).

As we file past the priest, we come to an altar boy holding the basket of blessed bread. People will take portions for themselves and for visitors and non-Orthodox friends around them. If someone hands you a piece of blessed bread, do not panic; it is not the eucharistic Body. It is a sign of fellowship.

Visitors are sometimes offended that they are not allowed to receive communion. Orthodox believe that receiving communion is broader than me-and-Jesus; it acknowledges faith in historic Orthodox doctrine, obedience to a particular Orthodox bishop, and a commitment to a particular Orthodox worshipping community. There's nothing exclusive about this; everyone is invited to make this commitment to the Orthodox Church. But the Eucharist is the Church's treasure, and it is reserved for those who have united themselves with the Church. An analogy could be to reserving marital relations until after the wedding.

We also handle the Eucharist with more gravity than many denominations do, further explaining why we guard it from common access. We believe it is truly the Body and Blood of Christ. We ourselves do not receive communion unless we are making regular confession of our sins to a priest and are at peace with other communicants. We fast from all food and drink—yes, even a morning cup of coffee—from midnight the night before communion.

[/quote]




[color="#000000"][font="arial, verdana, tahoma, sans-serif"][size="3"]I love the idea of giving non-Orthodox friends a peace of blessed bread! It's a way to allow them to share in the fellowship if not the actual Body & Blood of Jesus.[/size][/font][/color]

[/size][/font][/color]

[Mark of the Cross]

I've never been really comfortable with the idea of refusing people communion. When I first started going to Mass because my wife is Catholic, I took communion not knowing the Churches view. When I was told I had to go through RCIA and not take communion until Easter, I was deeply offended. I thought how dare they refuse me my beloved Christ. Jesus offered himself to all people who will willingly receive him. It was touch and go for a while as I was nearly going to tell them what they could do. I decided that because of the first step in the 'Way of the Cross' I should obey their wishes. Just about every year that I have been a Catechist we've had someone who felt like me. It was explained to me that it is because they don't want people to suddenly get a rush and want to be a Catholic only to drop out a short time later. This reason doesn't really fly as we've had many who go through RCIA only to drop away a short time later anyway.

[quote name='vee8' timestamp='1295023932' post='2200057']
You have to join the team, get some training and instruction,
[/quote]

This is the best answer I have read. Explain to the person that the Catholic rule is that a person is not allowed to take communion until both the Church and the person is satisfied that the person understands fully what they are doing, that they accept the Catholic interpretation of Transubstantiation and that there is a fair chance that they will remain in the faith. As a Catechist at some point we have a meeting and we discuss whether each person is ready for full communion. The situation has not arisen but if we thought a person was not ready we would get their sponsor to broach the idea of going another year. When I went through RCIA we started late and so the priest decided that we should go another year which I was happy with because I hadn't decided at that stage. If they are of another denomination then suggest to them they can receive a blessing which is the equivalent to their understanding of the Eucharist, but we do not give Eucharist to those who do not share our belief in it.

[Papist]

For non-Catholics, it has been fairly easy by just saying by receiving communion you accept all the teachings of the Catholic Church. We believe that the host is the actual Flesh of our Lord Jesus Christ. So, the Catholic Church asks you to refrain from receiving communion until you complete the rite of initiation. Please respect this.

With fellow Catholics[including my family ], it is a little tougher. But, I simply layout what the Church teaches regarding the reception of the Eucharist, specifically its requirements.

You really can't physically force them to not go and receive. Bottom-line is to give them information so their conscience makes a better informed decision.

Edited January 18, 2011 by Papist

[MissyP89]

Thanks, everyone for your thoughtful responses. They were really helpful to me. At the same time, I got to see my confessor this weekend and we talked about this some. I think the reason it's always so awkward is because I'm afraid of a negative response -- as I mentioned earlier, in many circumstances it's a very fragile situation with a person who is very skittish about the Church and I only have one shot, if that makes sense.

I have the best of intentions, but sometimes it just comes out wrong.