Q About Modest Swimwear

[Brother Adam]

I appreciate the help 'tweeking' it. I personally would not restrict anyone from going without a t-shirt, especially in a water park, but I prefer to err on the side of caution.

[Lil Red]

[quote name='Brother Adam' date='19 July 2010 - 10:35 AM' timestamp='1279560941' post='2144934']
Actually they both are issues for girls as well, just not in the same way or to the same extent as they are for boys. This is something I have researched for the text I am working on.
[/quote]
that's why i said "supposedly"

[Brother Adam]

final tweek I hope

A Note on Modesty – As Christians we dress modestly so as to protect the purity of our brothers and sisters, and not place our own dignity in danger. Clothing must reflect a Christian atmosphere at all times. Shorts should be no more than 3 inches above the knee, no spaghetti straps, etc. I am not a “legalist” when it comes to clothing, basically, I just ask that you use common sense.

For Swimming: No bikinis. If you only own a bikini plan on wearing a t-shirt over it. Men should plan on wearing t-shirts while swimming. This is a common youth ministry practice.

Pack the clothing you need for the trip. Remember to bring warm clothes for overnight, and pack rain gear just in case. We will not cancel for rain.

[Sojourner]

[quote name='homeschoolmom' date='19 July 2010 - 11:33 AM' timestamp='1279560789' post='2144932']
She did. However, they walked to the local (public) waterpark for an afternoon there. The sisters are strict on what they can and can't wear at camp.

And I agree with you that it would be too much to ask people to buy another swimsuit for an event that just sorta came up. (We know the camp rules well in advance and buy accordingly-- my dd would want a one-piece anyway, though). If she had a nice tankini and I were asked to buy her another suit for one day, I'd be upset.
[/quote]
I sometimes go swimming with one of my SILs (my DH calls it "facebook in the pool"). I have learned that, with my build, a high-cut halter top is the most modest. I was only able to find those in tankini styles when I was shopping. So even though I have a relatively high-cut one piece, in practice it is not as modest as my tankini.

[quote name='Brother Adam' date='19 July 2010 - 11:35 AM' timestamp='1279560941' post='2144934']
Actually they both are issues for girls as well, just not in the same way or to the same extent as they are for boys.
[/quote]
I think that was her point.

[Socrates]

[quote name='Lil Red' date='19 July 2010 - 01:23 PM' timestamp='1279560224' post='2144917']
no, it isn't overboard. what about those girls or guys that struggle with SSA?
[/quote]
Must we "cater" to perversions in this way?

I've got no experience with girl's locker rooms, but I can guarantee that in a boy's locker room, if someone so much as ogles another guy, he's asking to get his butt kicked. People need to learn to overcome their disordered inclinations and temptations. Most men will likely be in situations where they will see other men naked, and they need to learn to deal with it.

I think that kind of excessive "protection" is likely counter-productive anyways. If a boy is exposed to members of the same sex in healthy, non-sexual ways at a young age, he will be less likely to develop problems with SSA.

Healthy modesty's good, but you can take things too far.

Edited July 19, 2010 by Socrates

[Laudate_Dominum]

[quote name='Sacred Music Man' date='19 July 2010 - 01:37 PM' timestamp='1279561038' post='2144935']
Werd. A lot of your time lords will be parking their tardises. Also, Maybe the prohibition on swords doesn't help chivalry, imho.
[/quote]
whoa. we need to catch up. it's been a while since we've really geeked out.

[Sojourner]

[quote name='Socrates' date='19 July 2010 - 11:47 AM' timestamp='1279561620' post='2144946']
Must we "cater" to perversions in this way?

I've got no experience with girl's locker rooms, but I can guarantee than in a boy's locker room, if someone so much as ogles another guy, he's asking to get his butt kicked. People need to learn to overcome their disordered inclinations and temptations. Most men will likely be in situations where they will see other men naked, and they need to learn to deal with it.

I think that kind of excessive "protection" is likely counter-productive anyways. If a boy is exposed to members of the same sex in healthy, non-sexual ways at a young age, he will be less likely to develop problems with SSA.

Healthy modesty's good, but you can take things too far.
[/quote]
So you would advocate modesty in a situation where a male might be tempted by a female, but not in a situation where he might be tempted by another male?

In both instances, the thing we're attempting to protect against is a perversion of true love. Why is it that the heterosexual with perverse inclinations (heterosexual lust) deserves more help (modesty) than the homosexual with perverse inclinations?

[homeschoolmom]

[quote name='Sacred Music Man' date='19 July 2010 - 01:37 PM' timestamp='1279561038' post='2144935']
Werd. A lot of your time lords will be parking their tardises. Also, Maybe the prohibition on swords doesn't help chivalry, imho.
[/quote]


[quote name='Laudate_Dominum' date='19 July 2010 - 01:47 PM' timestamp='1279561678' post='2144950']
whoa. we need to catch up. it's been a while since we've really geeked out.
[/quote]


Is it necessary to lame up every single thread?

Getting back to the swimwear conversation:

Terra-- yes, I agree many tankinis are better than some one-pieces. Swimsuits for women are horrible to buy. I haven't worn a swimsuit in years simply because I hate buying them. Dd can probably wear her current one for maybe one more summer before we have to shop in the juniors department which, I'm sure, will be much more challenging.

[Cherie]

[quote name='Terra Firma' date='19 July 2010 - 01:51 PM' timestamp='1279561870' post='2144953']
In both instances, the thing we're attempting to protect against is a perversion of true love. Why is it that the heterosexual with perverse inclinations (heterosexual lust) deserves more help (modesty) than the homosexual with perverse inclinations?
[/quote]

I must say I agree with you and Lil Red on this.

I think part of the problem in our society today is the fact that many aren't careful anymore in regard to modesty, even with people of the same sex.

When I was in the convent, we were supposed to take caution to be modest even when we were by ourselves! While I know those types of rules don't apply to people who aren't in religious life, it at least taught me how precious modesty is, and that it isn't only something that is done for the sake of other people, but for the sake of our own dignity as children of God.

[Margaret Mary]

Here's a good modest swimwear site. My sisters and I get our bathing suits here. [url="http://www.swimmodest.com"]My link[/url]

Edited July 19, 2010 by Margaret Mary

[jeffpugh]

[quote name='Laudate_Dominum' date='19 July 2010 - 01:47 PM' timestamp='1279561678' post='2144950']
whoa. we need to catch up. it's been a while since we've really geeked out.
[/quote]
You've been the one who was gone, bro. Tinychat tonight or something?

[Socrates]

[quote name='Terra Firma' date='19 July 2010 - 01:51 PM' timestamp='1279561870' post='2144953']
So you would advocate modesty in a situation where a male might be tempted by a female, but not in a situation where he might be tempted by another male?

In both instances, the thing we're attempting to protect against is a perversion of true love. Why is it that the heterosexual with perverse inclinations (heterosexual lust) deserves more help (modesty) than the homosexual with perverse inclinations?
[/quote]
I think you're missing the point.

Basically, I don't think the exact same standards of modesty should be practiced around members of the same sex as with members of the opposite sex.
I think more familiarity with members of the same sex from a young age, and a certain segregation of the sexes is good and natural, and helps in the natural development of a healthy sexuality.
I think this has been hurt in modern times by the increasingly "unisex" society, in which members of the two sexes are treated as essentially the same.
Ironically, the more healthily familiar kids are with members of the same sex, the less likely they will to develop "romantic" longings for the same sex later on. Also, a certain air of "mystery" about the opposite sex contributes to healthy romantic relationships with them.

Besides, I think setting up situations to "protect" those with homosexual inclinations, merely reinforces and "normalizes" homosexuality. Like I said, a public shower or locker-room in a normal "straight" setting is not an occasion for homosexual debauchery (or at least I hope it would not be in a Christian camp).
I'm reminded of a thread on here where people were debating whether "gay" students should room with female students.
I know I'm old-fashioned and out-of-touch, but that whole line of thought strikes me as very wrong.

[jeffpugh]

[quote name='Socrates' date='19 July 2010 - 02:10 PM' timestamp='1279563058' post='2144965']
I think you're missing the point.

Basically, I don't think the exact same standards of modesty should be practiced around members of the same sex as with members of the opposite sex.
I think more familiarity with members of the same sex from a young age, and a certain segregation of the sexes is good and natural, and helps in the natural development of a healthy sexuality.
I think this has been hurt in modern times by the increasingly "unisex" society, in which members of the two sexes are treated as essentially the same.
Ironically, the more healthily familiar kids are with members of the same sex, the less likely they will to develop "romantic" longings for the same sex later on. Also, a certain air of "mystery" about the opposite sex contributes to healthy romantic relationships with them.

Besides, I think setting up situations to "protect" those with homosexual inclinations, merely reinforces and "normalizes" homosexuality. Like I said, a public shower or locker-room in a normal "straight" setting is not an occasion for homosexual debauchery (or at least I hope it would not be in a Christian camp).
I'm reminded of a thread on here where people were debating whether "gay" students should room with female students.
I know I'm old-fashioned and out-of-touch, but that whole line of thought strikes me as very wrong.
[/quote]
Plus one. I also believe that the root of many problems in society concerns the disorder of time and place and reservation. Totally on base with your post. As for the latter part about SSA guys rooming with girls, there is no way to prove the guy is not "straight"

[Slappo]

My workbreak just ended.


Quick two cents on shirts while swimming:
I wouldn't wear a cotton shirt swimming as that gets heavy and bogs you down. I did own a "swim shirt" but it was too small. It was designed specifically for swimming in the water.

The shirt I wear now in the water is UnderArmor's warm weather shirts. They are very tight fitting which prevents them from catching in the water, and the material doesn't retain much water. The shirt actually dries out in like 5 minutes in the sun. That's what I wore snorkeling and swimming in Hawaii.


As a man I was not comfortable being shirtless very often in the public, so I made sure to bring a shirt I could swim in. Any man that plans on swimming regularly in mixed company I think should get a shirt for it, but the random trip where swimming might be included... it'd be excessive to ask them to bring a $30 shirt.

[Lilllabettt]

Sunday before last I went to the beach wearing my Muslim swimsuit. Actually, I know hard core Jewish girls who wear them too.
(they're from [url="https://splas004.secure.omnis.com/store/images/uploads/model_photos.htm"]Splash Gear[/url])

Quite expensive. But totally safe in the water: not heavy, bulky or binding.
And not SO weird looking.

I had a surfer dude swim up to me and ask me where I got my suit, because he wanted to get some.

Bonus: Used a lot less sunscreen.

Edited July 19, 2010 by Lilllabettt