Shana Posted June 21, 2010 Share Posted June 21, 2010 (edited) So a little while ago I started a thread asking for advice regarding a community I'm interested in not responding to my inquiry. It' going on a month and I have tried emailing, calling and leaving a message, and writing a letter but no response. I did send one of the sisters (there are two of them right now-it's an emerging community) a friend request and she has accepted. I am sure they are busy but their facebook page DOES say that they are now accepting inquiries into their life. I notice she is on facebook everyday. I feel temped to write on her wall or send her a short message asking if she got my email or letter but I don't want to be an obnoxious nagging pest. I am getting very frustrated because I really feel that I must communicate with this community, and I'm stuck in my discernment until I do so. I could explain why that is so but it's sort of irrelevent to my question. Help!? Edited June 21, 2010 by Shana Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
laetitia crucis Posted June 21, 2010 Share Posted June 21, 2010 Maybe I'm an obnoxious nagging pest, but I'd write on her wall or send her a message at this point. Persistent knocking neighbor -- FTW! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bennn Posted June 21, 2010 Share Posted June 21, 2010 Saint Benedict wrote in his Rule that when an new aspirant came knocking on the door, they had to let him wait before opening the door to them in order to test their sincerity. I don't know if that relates to your situation, but that simply came to my mind. God bless you in your discernment. +Pax Domini, Ben Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shana Posted June 21, 2010 Author Share Posted June 21, 2010 Ok well, it's been closer to three weeks actually since I first tried contacting them but next Sunday it will be a month. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
vee Posted June 21, 2010 Share Posted June 21, 2010 I know how you feel. Try waiting 1-2 months+ to hear back due to a community being busy and also limiting correspondence during Advent and Lent. It certainly was a great lesson in patience and focusing on Gods will not my own. I say relax and don't think about them for one week. Every time you think about them say some prayers instead, an Our Father or a Hail Mary for them then go try to do something else to distract yourself. After one week then post a message on her wall. That's my two cents you don't have to take it but I can certainly sympathize! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
vee Posted June 21, 2010 Share Posted June 21, 2010 (edited) Double post ooops Edited June 21, 2010 by vee8 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cherie Posted June 21, 2010 Share Posted June 21, 2010 (edited) [quote name='Shana' date='21 June 2010 - 01:34 PM' timestamp='1277141654' post='2132249'] So a little while ago I started a thread asking for advice regarding a community I'm interested in not responding to my inquiry. It' going on a month and I have tried emailing, calling and leaving a message, and writing a letter but no response. I did send one of the sisters (there are two of them right now-it's an emerging community) a friend request and she has accepted. I am sure they are busy but their facebook page DOES say that they are now accepting inquiries into their life. I notice she is on facebook everyday. I feel temped to write on her wall or send her a short message asking if she got my email or letter but I don't want to be an obnoxious nagging pest. I am getting very frustrated because I really feel that I must communicate with this community, and I'm stuck in my discernment until I do so. I could explain why that is so but it's sort of irrelevent to my question. Help!? [/quote] I don't think it would be nagging at all to write on her Facebook page. Part of the reason why some communities have websites or, especially, Facebook pages is to be easily accessible. I think that's a perfectly appropriate and reasonable response, especially since it is making you frustrated. You are not being inappropriate, you are simply asking if she got your e-mail or letter, and a three-week wait for an e-mail is too long, in my opinion. (I know this from having contacted various other communities by e-mail, so I'm saying that from my own experience.) Perhaps she is busy and has forgotten to get back to you (having been in a convent, I know this happens all the time). A little reminder might be a good thing. Edited June 21, 2010 by CherieMadame Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shana Posted June 21, 2010 Author Share Posted June 21, 2010 (edited) Well I emailed my spiritual director about this (I can't meet with him during the summer because of distance). And I've messaged the vocation director for my diocese who I know well. And I'll be having a phone appointment with Sr. Helena who is accompanying me in my discernment with the Daughters of St. Paul. Maybe I should wait to hear back from one of them. Sr. Helena I noticed is friends with her on facebook and is in the same city as she so maybe she could help. I'm just afraid because after writing on her wall, if she doesn't respond I would have exhaused all of my "cards" and be even more sad and feel even more like a pest than I do now... Edited June 21, 2010 by Shana Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OnlySunshine Posted June 21, 2010 Share Posted June 21, 2010 Just an idea, but they might not respond right away because it might be their charism to pray about inquiries and how best to go about them. The CFR Sisters did this to me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shana Posted June 21, 2010 Author Share Posted June 21, 2010 [quote name='MaterMisericordiae' date='21 June 2010 - 02:54 PM' timestamp='1277150087' post='2132324'] Just an idea, but they might not respond right away because it might be their charism to pray about inquiries and how best to go about them. The CFR Sisters did this to me. [/quote] Could you explain this a bit? Do you think they will get back to me? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cherie Posted June 21, 2010 Share Posted June 21, 2010 (edited) [quote name='Shana' date='21 June 2010 - 03:24 PM' timestamp='1277148293' post='2132312'] Well I emailed my spiritual director about this (I can't meet with him during the summer because of distance). And I've messaged the vocation director for my diocese who I know well. And I'll be having a phone appointment with Sr. Helena who is accompanying me in my discernment with the Daughters of St. Paul. Maybe I should wait to hear back from one of them. Sr. Helena I noticed is friends with her on facebook and is in the same city as she so maybe she could help. I'm just afraid because after writing on her wall, if she doesn't respond I would have exhaused all of my "cards" and be even more sad and feel even more like a pest than I do now... [/quote] Perhaps if you wrote on their Facebook page, but STILL do not receive a response, maybe it's God's way of leading you elsewhere? Or perhaps a response will pop out at the very moment you need it. I know with brand-new communities especially, oftentimes they aren't even able to take inquiries until a certain time of their foundation. Perhaps (and this is pure speculation) they had originally taken inquiries, but were advised to put it on hold for a time by their bishop. Edited June 21, 2010 by CherieMadame Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shana Posted June 21, 2010 Author Share Posted June 21, 2010 Well I left a message on her wall asking if she received my email or letter and if they are accepting inquiries at this point. I couldn't resist any longer... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shana Posted June 22, 2010 Author Share Posted June 22, 2010 Yup, she's deliberately ignoring me apparently. Responded to another person's wall post but not me. Super... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TeresaBenedicta Posted June 22, 2010 Share Posted June 22, 2010 [quote name='Shana' date='22 June 2010 - 02:41 AM' timestamp='1277185276' post='2132656'] Yup, she's deliberately ignoring me apparently. Responded to another person's wall post but not me. Super... [/quote] Oh, perhaps not! I know that I've many a times responded to simpler inquiries or messages that are more recent if only for the fact that I hadn't the time or the resources needed to adequately respond to someone who had contacted me earlier. Who knows what Sister might be doing. I know it's hard-- trust me, I went through a heck of a time with various contact with "my" community. When I tried to call to say "I want to enter," I had to call four times in the time period of two weeks, had left two messages, and still heard nothing back from the Vocation Director!!! (Talk about nerve racking for someone who wasn't sure how long she'd have the nerve to ask to enter!) Finally I got an e-mail that apologized for not responding to my phone calls and explained the situation that kept her so super busy at the moment. Sometimes God gives us these frustrating times to check our perseverance and to help us grow in abandonment to His holy will. Rest assured of my prayers!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shana Posted June 22, 2010 Author Share Posted June 22, 2010 Thanks but the question I asked on her was I presume wasn't extremely challenging. I just asked if she received my letter or email and if they were accepting inquiries at this point. Notice how I gave her an opportunity for her to politely tell me to leave them alone for now by saying that they are having a hard time responding to inquiries at this point. Basically they were yes or no questions. I don't understand why she won't take literally two seconds to respond to such simple questions... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Create an account or sign in to comment
You need to be a member in order to leave a comment
Create an account
Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!
Register a new accountSign in
Already have an account? Sign in here.
Sign In Now