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Do You Need Godparents?


havok579257

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havok579257

Our son is almost here and of course he will be getting baptized. Now from my understanding, you don't have to have godparents. IS this correct? I ask because everyone we know does not meet the godparent requirment. All mny wife's family are non-catholic christian's and all my catholic family members are not actively practicing. Even our catholic friends are not really praciticing.

So just wanted to make sure that I am thinking right here and we are not required to have godparents to get our child baptized?

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homeschoolmom

I think in the case of an emergency baptism, you don't. If it's not, however, I think you do need one. (We were in pretty much the same boat... You have my prayers.)

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havok579257

[quote name='homeschoolmom' date='05 June 2010 - 07:58 PM' timestamp='1275782316' post='2124283']
I think in the case of an emergency baptism, you don't. If it's not, however, I think you do need one. (We were in pretty much the same boat... You have my prayers.)
[/quote]


so then what are we supposed to do? i mean there is no one we know who fits the criteria. everyone is either non catholic christian or non practicing catholic. i mean seriously, everyone we know does not fit the criteria, everyone. what are we supposed to do then?

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Nihil Obstat

[quote name='havok579257' date='05 June 2010 - 07:14 PM' timestamp='1275783244' post='2124291']
so then what are we supposed to do? i mean there is no one we know who fits the criteria. everyone is either non catholic christian or non practicing catholic. i mean seriously, everyone we know does not fit the criteria, everyone. what are we supposed to do then?
[/quote]
Pick someone in the parish with whom you can get along.

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homeschoolmom

What I would do is ask your priest if there is someone in the parish who would be interested in standing in as the official Godparent and ask one of your non-Catholic Christian friends/relatives to be the other one. There must be some faithful person in your parish who would be honored to help out in this situation. You still have time to get to know this person before your baby comes...

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havok579257

[quote name='Nihil Obstat' date='05 June 2010 - 08:16 PM' timestamp='1275783376' post='2124293']
Pick someone in the parish with whom you can get along.
[/quote]


i don't personally know anyone in our parish personally. other than seeing them at mass or confession. so that won't work. unless its normal for a total stranger to ask you to be their childs godparents.

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havok579257

[quote name='homeschoolmom' date='05 June 2010 - 08:17 PM' timestamp='1275783427' post='2124295']
What I would do is ask your priest if there is someone in the parish who would be interested in standing in as the official Godparent and ask one of your non-Catholic Christian friends/relatives to be the other one. There must be some faithful person in your parish who would be honored to help out in this situation. You still have time to get to know this person before your baby comes...
[/quote]


isn't that weird. i mean having someone be your childs godparent who is going to have nothing to do with your child after the baptism?

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homeschoolmom

Probably... I don't really know... I guess you should ask your priest what to do.

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tinytherese

Well, you can spend time getting to know a couple who is active in the church or who your priest recommends. Then you could have them more active in your son's life.

Edited by tinytherese
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Thy Geekdom Come

[quote name='homeschoolmom' date='05 June 2010 - 08:17 PM' timestamp='1275783427' post='2124295']
What I would do is ask your priest if there is someone in the parish who would be interested in standing in as the official Godparent and ask one of your non-Catholic Christian friends/relatives to be the other one. There must be some faithful person in your parish who would be honored to help out in this situation. You still have time to get to know this person before your baby comes...
[/quote]

I agree with hsmom, I would ask your priest if he knows anyone. Your non-Catholic Christian friend (as long as they have proof of their own baptism)could stand in as a Christian Witness. They would not be officially called a Godparent as the Church only recognizes Catholic parties as Godparents. Your child's certificate would read "Godparent being 'John Doe' and Christian Witness being 'Jane Doe'".

You also need to check with your parish to make sure that you have all the necessary paperwork and classes done. Some dioceses and individual parishes require you attend a Baptismal Seminar and have copies of your marriage certificates, your godparent's Confirmation certificates, etc.

Contact your parish and speak with whomever is in charge of coordinating the baptisms for that parish.

- Jennie "StColette"

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rhetoricfemme

We're kind of in the same situation. We're military so we never really get a chance to make any solid Catholic friends. Our son's Godparents (yes, I know the Church doesn't refer to them as such) are two friends we've had for a long time, and they are also married to one another. They are solid upstanding Christians, and I have no doubt that they will help convict our son to his Catholic upbringing. They just aren't Catholic themselves...

So we're going to need to find a trustworthy Catholic at our parish when the time comes. And his Godparents will be there and documented as Christian witnesses.

Good luck with this, we'll be praying that your solution comes!

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Please note that when choosing Godparents, those selected do not have to be present at the Baptism. All four Godparents (2 for Aaron and 2 for Mary) were unable to come to the Baptisms. The Church allows for proxy Godparents. This means that if the actual Godparents are unable to attend the Baptism then someone can stand in their place on their behalf. With Aaron's baptism, Micah's parents stood in as the proxies and for Mary's two of my friends/co-workers stepped in for us. The name of the Godparents that will appear on the certificate and in the Sacramental books are the names of the actual Godparents, not the proxies.

- Jennie


(there signed in under my own name now lol)

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homeschoolmom

[quote name='Raphael' date='05 June 2010 - 09:03 PM' timestamp='1275786189' post='2124314']
Please not that when choosing Godparents, those selected do not have to be present at the Baptism. All four Godparents (2 for Aaron and 2 for Mary) were unable to come to the Baptisms. The Church allows for proxy Godparents. This means that if the actual Godparents are unable to attend the Baptism then someone can stand in their place on their behalf. With Aaron's baptism, Micah's parents stood in as the proxies and for Mary's two of my friends/co-workers stepped in for us. The name of the Godparents that will appear on the certificate and in the Sacramental books are the names of the actual Godparents, not the proxies.

- Jennie
[/quote]

Didn't that cause hurt feelings with actual Catholics being chosen as proxies, but not as Godparents?

Another thought, havok.... Is there anyone among your Catholic relatives/friends who might be so honored to be chosen that s/he would step up in their responsibility and work on their own faith development?

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[quote name='havok579257' date='05 June 2010 - 08:31 PM' timestamp='1275784309' post='2124298']
i don't personally know anyone in our parish personally. other than seeing them at mass or confession. so that won't work. unless its normal for a total stranger to ask you to be their childs godparents.
[/quote]

Honestly, tell your priest your situation and ask if he has suggestions for someone. There are often many lovely people in the parish (especially, but not exclusively, older people) who would be happy to be godparents, and would take their charge seriously. I'm sure they'd also befriend you, which would be GREAT to have another person in the parish who you can call your friend!


You do need a godparent -- but you only need one, two is not necessary.

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[quote name='rhetoricfemme' date='05 June 2010 - 08:59 PM' timestamp='1275785971' post='2124312']
We're kind of in the same situation. We're military so we never really get a chance to make any solid Catholic friends. Our son's Godparents (yes, I know the Church doesn't refer to them as such) are two friends we've had for a long time, and they are also married to one another. They are solid upstanding Christians, and I have no doubt that they will help convict our son to his Catholic upbringing. They just aren't Catholic themselves...

So we're going to need to find a trustworthy Catholic at our parish when the time comes. And his Godparents will be there and documented as Christian witnesses.

Good luck with this, we'll be praying that your solution comes!
[/quote]

The Church does not allow for two Christian witnesses and no Catholic godparent. The child being baptized must have a Catholic godparent, even if it is only 1 instead of 2. Your friends can both be Christian witnesses, but the Church requires a Catholic to be the child's actual godparent.

If you know or have any Catholic relatives that are practicing and in good standing with the Church they may be his godparent and you can have a proxy stand in for them at the actual Baptism and your friends can be Christian witnesses.

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