Husband At Bachelor Party

[KnightofChrist]

[quote name='Semper Catholic' date='05 June 2010 - 09:05 PM' timestamp='1275786345' post='2124318']
Yes clearly going to a bachelor party is on the same level as getting an abortion or becoming an alcoholic.

I know this is a place for "hardcore" Catholics, but 99% of America and I'd say a majority of Catholics don't walk such a strict line.
[/quote]

99% of Strawmen certainly agree. Abortion is not on the same level of wickedness, but going to such events is dwelling in the sins of the flesh, perversion, and lust.

[Thy Geekdom Come]

[quote name='Semper Catholic' date='05 June 2010 - 08:56 PM' timestamp='1275785782' post='2124308']
I am. It's important for OP to also realize that going to unsavory places for Bachelor Parties is practically an American Past time. It's also an American past time, to keep that information from the bride-to-be (see The Hangover, i.e. a movie that is apparently popular around these parts as I see a number of Zach avatars).

With that said lying is bad and he should be punished, but this is nowhere near something to be overly concerned about.
[/quote]
Ah, right, as long as it's an American pastime! You had me worried! I mean, Jesus said that lust was adultery, but he didn't realize that eventually, in some countries, lust would become a pastime. The fact that it's popular makes it okay. The divorce it's associated with is also a popular American pastime, so no problem there. The bad relationships, bad habits of viewing the opposite sex as an object, and the way lust ruins families, well those are all American pastimes, too. But lying...yeah, we should definitely punish that...goodness knows it's not an American pastime.

To the original poster, please know that my thoughts and prayers are with you. Lust, which is a self-centered way of thought, is diametrically opposed to everything that love and marriage are about. I would tell him not to go, let him know that you're upset, and if he goes, spend the whole time in prayer asking that God touch his heart. Keep praying for him and being a Christian witness to him. Show him the kind of genuine, self-sacrificing love he's not showing you, and definitely speak with your priest. There are women here who have gone through similar ordeals. I hope some of them will have the courage to post.

[Thy Geekdom Come]

[quote name='Semper Catholic' date='05 June 2010 - 09:05 PM' timestamp='1275786345' post='2124318']
Yes clearly going to a bachelor party is on the same level as getting an abortion or becoming an alcoholic.

I know this is a place for "hardcore" Catholics, but 99% of America and I'd say a majority of Catholics don't walk such a strict line.
[/quote]
Jesus Christ disagrees with 99% of America and a majority of Catholics, then. I don't care what anyone else thinks, except Jesus. Neither should you.

You know, the word Catholic means "according to the whole.". Calling ourselves Catholics means that we accept the WHOLE faith and strive to live by it WHOLLY.

[Cherie]

[quote name='Semper Catholic' date='05 June 2010 - 09:05 PM' timestamp='1275786345' post='2124318']
Yes clearly going to a bachelor party is on the same level as getting an abortion or becoming an alcoholic.

I know this is a place for "hardcore" Catholics, but 99% of America and I'd say a majority of Catholics don't walk such a strict line.
[/quote]

And 80% of "Catholic" couples are contracepting, too.

It is most definitely immoral and utterly wrong for a husband to take part in such a licentious thing, and his wife has EVERY RIGHT to insist he not take part in such filth.

I know from my own experience in my OWN FAMILY the HORRORS of pornography, and how it DESTROYS couples and RIPS FAMILIES APART. And yes, strippers at a bachelor party constitutes pornography. It's CERTAINLY not something to be taken lightly, even if it is "popular." No wonder our families in this country and society are in the shambles they are today, because of people who take the "it's not that bad, and everyone does it" approach.

LORD HAVE MERCY ON US!

[homeschoolmom]

[quote name='Raphael' date='05 June 2010 - 09:13 PM' timestamp='1275786829' post='2124332']
Jesus Christ disagrees with 99% of America and a majority of Catholics, then. I don't care what anyone else thinks, except Jesus. Neither should you.

You know, the word Catholic means "according to the whole.". Calling ourselves Catholics means that we accept the WHOLE faith and strive to live by it WHOLELY.
[/quote]
and holily.

[Thy Geekdom Come]

[quote name='CherieMadame' date='05 June 2010 - 09:19 PM' timestamp='1275787179' post='2124338']
And 80% of "Catholic" couples are contracepting, too.


[/quote]
I'm pretty sure it's closer to 96% *terrified for the Second Coming* [not to imply that I contracept]

[Thy Geekdom Come]

[quote name='homeschoolmom' date='05 June 2010 - 09:22 PM' timestamp='1275787323' post='2124340']
and holily.
[/quote]
Be wholly holy. Werd.

[homeschoolmom]

[quote name='Raphael' date='05 June 2010 - 09:23 PM' timestamp='1275787436' post='2124346']
Be wholly holy. Werd.
[/quote]
But not holey... at least not toooo holey.

[Thy Geekdom Come]

[quote name='homeschoolmom' date='05 June 2010 - 09:25 PM' timestamp='1275787550' post='2124348']
But not holey... at least not toooo holey.
[/quote]
Like Swiss coagulated milk.

[ThePenciledOne]

I wrote a blog post a while back concerning bachelor parties.

I dunno if it will help, but sometimes it can when you here another voice that can put into word your own feelings maybe.
[url="http://thepenciledone.wordpress.com/2009/11/03/the-party-is-over-now/"]
The Party is Over Now[/url]

Edited June 6, 2010 by ThePenciledOne

[Semper Catholic]

LOL you guys are really going off the deep end with this one.

I'm not in anyway shape or form advocating that it is ok to go to strip clubs. I feel like I'm on The O'Reilly Factor here.

With that said, I am arguing that this shouldn't be made out to be a bigger problem then it actually is.

You shouldn't get up an leave your husband if he looks at another woman walking down the street, he probably deserves a pretty good punch in the arm though.

Don't make mountains out of molehill's, pwning your husband on facebook I think is a much more fitting punishment, one that will get your point across and one that won't make him freakout by dragging him to a priest.

inb4 sarcastic replies

[zunshynn]

[quote name='Semper Catholic' date='05 June 2010 - 07:38 PM' timestamp='1275788286' post='2124359']
LOL you guys are really going off the deep end with this one.

I'm not in anyway shape or form advocating that it is ok to go to strip clubs. I feel like I'm on The O'Reilly Factor here.

With that said, I am arguing that this shouldn't be made out to be a bigger problem then it actually is.

You shouldn't get up an leave your husband if he looks at another woman walking down the street, he probably deserves a pretty good punch in the arm though.

Don't make mountains out of molehill's, pwning your husband on facebook I think is a much more fitting punishment, one that will get your point across and one that won't make him freakout by dragging him to a priest.

inb4 sarcastic replies
[/quote]

a married man checking out a woman walking down the street is VASTLY different from a married man (or any man) going to see strippers at a bachelor's party. The first is accidental, the second is intentional. (Not to mention that occasion for arousal is much greater in the second instance than the first).

I don't think anyone here has suggested that someone should leave because of something like that, but it IS serious, and is NOT just something that should be accepted because society thinks its normal.

Edited June 6, 2010 by zunshynn

[Catholic Fox]

You were lied to, and are feeling hurt. I don't blame you.

I also don't see anything wrong with "dragging your husband to a priest" as "Semper Catholic" so disparagingly put it.

[Cherie]

[quote name='Semper Catholic' date='05 June 2010 - 09:38 PM' timestamp='1275788286' post='2124359']

Don't make mountains out of molehill's, pwning your husband on facebook I think is a much more fitting punishment, one that will get your point across and one that won't make him freakout by dragging him to a priest.

[/quote]

Writing a false and embarrassing update on Facebook is a very childish reaction to a serious problem. I would not recommend any married couple resorting to such childishness when they need to discuss something seriously, no matter how tempting or funny it would be. We are supposed to be healthy adults who can honestly and responsibly talk about our needs and feelings.

And I don't think it's making a mountain out of a molehill. It is a serious problem, it can cause serious marital strife when a couple disagrees on something so fundamental. Going to a priest seems like a good idea, and it can be done very casually in an atmosphere that wouldn't "freak out" her husband -- and if need be, maybe seeing Father privately about the issue would be beneficial, as well.

rwri10, I will be praying for you and your husband! And honestly, I think a good patroness in your regard would be St. Monica. Pray for your husband, especially through her intercession -- prayer works wonders, even if you have to wait a long time to see the "results"!!

[Thy Geekdom Come]

[quote name='Semper Catholic' date='05 June 2010 - 09:38 PM' timestamp='1275788286' post='2124359']
LOL you guys are really going off the deep end with this one.

I'm not in anyway shape or form advocating that it is ok to go to strip clubs. I feel like I'm on The O'Reilly Factor here.

With that said, I am arguing that this shouldn't be made out to be a bigger problem then it actually is.

You shouldn't get up an leave your husband if he looks at another woman walking down the street, he probably deserves a pretty good punch in the arm though.

Don't make mountains out of molehill's, pwning your husband on facebook I think is a much more fitting punishment, one that will get your point across and one that won't make him freakout by dragging him to a priest.

inb4 sarcastic replies
[/quote]
You have a lot of growing up to do.