Krush2k2 Posted April 15, 2004 Share Posted April 15, 2004 hey chikas and chikoz-just wondering, I'm assuming most of the people reading this are either in high school or freshly out-so with that in mind-being Catholic or Christian-how did you go about dating, what did you learn, and what did you find as a common weakness on your part and the weakness of the people u dated. Wellz for me, I'm 19. I'm first year in college at Richland-throughout my high school years I had 4 girlfriends. I learned that the nicer a guy you are-the more you become like a brother to them. All that broke up all said it was because I was so brotherly and became like a best friend to them. Its hard trying to balance that because I'm such a compassionate person and I dont want to put up an act of some jerk just to win girls over. LOL its so wierd how the girls always go for the jerk. I never understood that. Also I think I handled my christian morals pretty well with the first 3. I liked the 4th one so much that I slipped a few times into doing stuff maybe I shouldnt have. All in all this has made me a stronger person-I'm not out here to be a playa I'm out to see what has 2 offer as a wife. Anyone have similar experiences? LeT the PhaM knOw! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
VeraMaria Posted April 15, 2004 Share Posted April 15, 2004 Guys are idiots. Any questions? Just kidding, but my experience with High School guys so far hasn't been good. I won't go out with someone unless I really like him, and I have known him for a while. Not just some random guy. Well these "popular" guys keep asking me out and I keep saying no, because they are jerks, which makes them even more determined to get me because they're those dumbguys with egos the size of the galaxy who think that any girl would faint to go out with them. What an "honor". lol, as you can tell I'm not in the best mood today Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fiat_Voluntas_Tua Posted April 15, 2004 Share Posted April 15, 2004 I am 18, and I am dating this amazing holy beautifully gorgeous modest girl who is also 18 (except she is at Boston College and I am in Kansas) She used to live in KS. So we were friends before she left. But anyways. In my oppinion dating should be no different than a holy friendship. If it leads to sin in any way, than it isn't good. My girlfriend and I help keep each other accountable, also our relationship is open to conform to God's will...If it His will for us to not dte, than in an instant we will stop dating. Also we don't have any physical parts to our relationship. When relationship become physical they often lead to sin and temptation. Pax et Agape per Maria, Andy Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RoseRed Posted April 15, 2004 Share Posted April 15, 2004 As a teenager in high school, I'd liked to ask what's the best way to deal with crushes ? Right now, I have a crush on my best friend and I struggle with the idea of what a boyfriend should be in terms of Catholicism, and I also struggle with the feelings i have for him so what's a Catholic girl to do.... Up until now, I've never dated anyone so any advice would be truly helpful, thanks so much .... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
prov31girl Posted April 15, 2004 Share Posted April 15, 2004 I can definitely relate RoseRed, but somehow I've gradually gotten better at taming my crushes. All I try to do is think of the numerous reasons I don't need to be in a relationship right now and try to think of the object of my affection more like my brother in Christ. That has really been helpful lately. It's easier said than done though. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
little_angel202 Posted April 15, 2004 Share Posted April 15, 2004 ahhh i've had a million and 1 crushes recently speshly on this gorg guy i met last summer at a catholic summer camp but he lives miles away o well !! now i've got over him i facing a worse problem this guy who i see at mass i get soooo distracted and its really hard to concentrate on praying when we both keep looking over at each other anyone have any suggestions ? God bless Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paladin D Posted April 15, 2004 Share Posted April 15, 2004 [quote name='VeraMaria' date='Apr 14 2004, 08:14 PM'] Guys are idiots. Any questions? Just kidding, but my experience with High School guys so far hasn't been good. I won't go out with someone unless I really like him, and I have known him for a while. Not just some random guy. Well these "popular" guys keep asking me out and I keep saying no, because they are jerks, which makes them even more determined to get me because they're those dumbguys with egos the size of the galaxy who think that any girl would faint to go out with them. What an "honor". lol, as you can tell I'm not in the best mood today [/quote] Ah don't date him (them), you're too [b]Catholic[/b] for him (them). Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Iacobus Posted April 15, 2004 Share Posted April 15, 2004 [quote name='thywillbedone7' date='Apr 14 2004, 09:01 PM'] I am 18, and I am dating this amazing holy beautifully gorgeous modest girl who is also 18 (except she is at Boston College and I am in Kansas) She used to live in KS. [/quote] Bill Gates did that with his gf. She would go see a movie and he would see it and afterwards they would call each other and talk about it . All the girls in my school are "bad" in my view. They don't have what I want. There is one girl I do like though in my parish I am SOOO happy we don't go to the same Mass time, Stations of the Cross wasn't so bad though. Hmmm now I can't tell her about this sitem, darn. LOL oh well. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sista2b Posted April 15, 2004 Share Posted April 15, 2004 i've only had one long term boyfriend. i don't know that i was ready for a boyfriend...lets just say i didn't really know how to handle myself to be a good Christian girlfriend for him. about the first post, i think thats the way hs dating should be. the less physical the better. esp. early hs, you're trying to figure out yourself to much to have a serious relationship. by now (i'm a senior) i'm ready to have a bf again, but i'm discerning religious life, hoping to enter in August, so theres really no point ne more. i think the best way is to be good friends w/ the person then let it grow. every girl who has a good guy friend likes the guy at some point. hopefully that helps a little Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CatholicCrusader Posted April 15, 2004 Share Posted April 15, 2004 [quote]I liked the 4th one so much that I slipped a few times into doing stuff maybe I shouldnt have[/quote] That's why HS dating is stupid..its evident that some sexual activity will happen sometime..and people EXPECT at LEAST to french kiss, which is a mortal sin, so I don't see how it can be at all justified. God bless. Also, most people don't date Catholics, which is also a sin. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pio Nono Posted April 15, 2004 Share Posted April 15, 2004 JMJ 4/15 - Easter Thursday Yeah, I'd stay away from dating in high school altogether (of course, being a seminarian who never dated in high school, my credibility may be zero ) - besides, Holy Mother Church prefers courting, and courting is a couple's way of discerning whether God wants them to marry. Unless you're ready to give your life away to that person, it's probably not a good idea to date them. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Iacobus Posted April 15, 2004 Share Posted April 15, 2004 (edited) CatholicCrusader, I can date with a female and it will not lead to sex or impure acts. Dating is HS does not always lead to sin, the two people can have will that will overcome and live AMDG still. Mostly in my view HS dating is seeing what you want in a furture mate. Seeing what you like and dislike before looking on a serouis level. Edited April 15, 2004 by Iacobus Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
voiciblanche Posted April 15, 2004 Share Posted April 15, 2004 I don't consider myself old enough to date yet, but even when I'm around other people who date, I know I won't. If someone asked me out tomorrow, I'd say no, and if someone asked me out when I'm 18, I'd say no. For one thing, I'm still discerning. I feel that I may be called to be a sister, and dating is to find a spouse. If I am called to become a sister, my spouse will be Christ! Who better? And if I decide that my vocation is that of a wife and mother instead, I will not date until I feel that I could drop everything and get married at that moment. I see no point in dating at high school age, but that's just me. As the extremely wise Jason says, what can dating give you that friendship can't? Okay, that was a bit off subject, but I'll post it anyway, lol. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CatholicCrusader Posted April 16, 2004 Share Posted April 16, 2004 Iacobus, Read what Pio Nono said; that basically sums up why not to date in HS (also the inevitable sexual sins, no matter how strong one thinks he is in this area). God bless. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Iacobus Posted April 16, 2004 Share Posted April 16, 2004 To me a HS dating relationship is someone that is a really good friend. Someone who you do stuff with and talk to and trust. This relationship does not lead to sin 100% of the time unless it is sinful to have a good friend. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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