Denied Confession!

[Hassan]

[quote name='Winchester' date='18 May 2010 - 04:07 PM' timestamp='1274213244' post='2113006']
Tragedy is when I cut my finger. Comedy is when you walk into an open manhole and die.
[/quote]

[BG45]

Sorry I had that wrong Missy!

The only time I've been denied a scheduled Confession was when every priest in the diocese was in a convocation with the Bishop for three days that he holds yearly. I would have had to schedule an appointment in another state entirely if I couldn't have waited. I still felt awful that Sunday being unable to receive the Eucharist.

[Thy Geekdom Come]

Strictly speaking, I don't think there's any requirement for a priest to set up an appointment system for Confession, but I've never heard of a priest turning down an appointment for it. I mean, most of our priests are far from being Pio's or Vianney's in the Confessional all day, but come on...not even taking appointments?

[size="7"]DUMB[/size]

[princessgianna]

[quote name='HisChildForever' date='18 May 2010 - 02:38 PM' timestamp='1274211502' post='2112960']
Okay, I have never made an appointment for Confession before, I just go during the Saturday hours. Now I went to Confession just over a week ago, but since I am taking a plane tomorrow I decided it would not hurt to go to Confession this afternoon. I called my parish and was told that they are no longer making appointments! What?? Even though it says so in the bulletin and on the website. Okay, I call up a parish in the town next door - and I get the same response! The lady says I can come on Saturday, but I told her I am taking a plane tomorrow, and she says well none of the priests are here right now. I say okay. After a brief rant to my dad I decide to call my parish back and lay it out for them. So I called back, I said I apologized for calling back but I am taking a long flight tomorrow and I want to go to Confession. I asked if any of the Fathers were there and she said no, she then suggested I call another parish which is actually her parish. Thankfully when I called there they accepted me and I have an appointment at 5. Is this normal? Can a parish "abolish" Confession by appointment??
[/quote]
um yea that doesn't sound right.

[AccountDeleted]

I don't know where in NJ you are, but I am pretty sure that if you phoned Father Romano at the Hermits of Bethlehem (Chester NJ) and explained your situation, he would have agreed to hear your Confession. I also phoned up once for an appointment outside of usual time at the Morrisville parish and the priest there agreed to hear my Confession before his daily Mass.

It does sound as if something needs to be said though, to address this problem in your parish. A person should never be turned away from the Sacrament of Confession - it is just too important to the soul. I am leaving on a plane next week for my live-in at Carmel and I fully intend to go to Confession this weekend, and I would hate to think that for any reason, I couldn't go make my Confession before I left here.

Good for you for perservering in this matter!

[IgnatiusofLoyola]

I do find the logistics of the Sacrament of Confession confusing. I just looked up the parish by my house to see when they have confession--exactly one hour a week, from 3:30-4:30 on Sat. Huh? How could that possibly be enough time?

The church is large--I'd say it holds 300-400 people. The parish has 6 Sunday obligation Masses--two on Sat evening, and four on Sunday. It also has two Masses a day during the week.

For the sake of argument, let's assume most of the parish doesn't go to Mass and only 600 people total attend Mass over the 6 Masses on Sat/Sun. How could one hour on Sat possibly be enough time for confession for even 600 people, let alone the actual attendance, which is probably at least double that (or they wouldn't have 6 Masses). The parish is large enough to support a full K-8 school, and I would suspect that most students who attend it are Catholic, since the public schools in our town are excellent--with an average of 20 kids per class and some of the highest test scores in the state.

Apparently the town I live in is so holy that no one ever commits mortal sin and needs to go to confession. Must be the water or something.

If other parishes have schedules like the parish near me, I'm surprised that even more people don't have problems getting their confessons heard.

BTW--The Sisters have their own retired priest who does their Masses (and I assume) their confessions, so I'm not counting them as regular parishoners of the local church. But, the parish does support them (and several of the Sisters teach at the parish school.) One thing I was impressed by in the parish is that they have a separate women's group whose only job is to make sure the Sisters have everything they need.

[AccountDeleted]

[quote name='IgnatiusofLoyola' date='19 May 2010 - 12:21 PM' timestamp='1274235677' post='2113332']
I do find the logistics of the Sacrament of Confession confusing. I just looked up the parish by my house to see when they have confession--exactly one hour a week, from 3:30-4:30 on Sat. Huh? How could that possibly be enough time?

The church is large--I'd say it holds 300-400 people. The parish has 6 Sunday obligation Masses--two on Sat evening, and four on Sunday. It also has two Masses a day during the week.

For the sake of argument, let's assume most of the parish doesn't go to Mass and only 600 people total attend Mass over the 6 Masses on Sat/Sun. How could one hour on Sat possibly be enough time for confession for even 600 people, let alone the actual attendance, which is probably at least double that (or they wouldn't have 6 Masses). The parish is large enough to support a full K-8 school, and I would suspect that most students who attend it are Catholic, since the public schools in our town are excellent--with an average of 20 kids per class and some of the highest test scores in the state.

Apparently the town I live in is so holy that no one ever commits mortal sin and needs to go to confession. Must be the water or something.

If other parishes have schedules like the parish near me, I'm surprised that even more people don't have problems getting their confessons heard.

BTW--The Sisters have their own retired priest who does their Masses (and I assume) their confessions, so I'm not counting them as regular parishoners of the local church. But, the parish does support them (and several of the Sisters teach at the parish school.) One thing I was impressed by in the parish is that they have a separate women's group whose only job is to make sure the Sisters have everything they need.
[/quote]



Catholics are only required to attend Confession once a year unless they have committed a mortal sin, but I do think that many Catholics fail to realize the great beauty and grace of this Sacrament.

Avoiding mortal sin doesn't seem to be a hard thing to me since it requires that there be grievous matter, sufficient reflection, and full consent of the will. After all, why would I want to do something that is a serious offence to God if I know it is and have given it sufficient reflection? That being said, Confession is not just about mortal sin, but about reconciling ourselves with God, and that includes our venial sins as well, so I try to attend Confession every 2-4 weeks to place myself in God's mercy and to acknowledge that I am a sinner and need His grace. Offending Him even in little ways, such as a lack of charity towards someone, can cause a separation between the soul and God, so it is such a grace that as Catholics, we have this Sacrament of Reconciliation.

If everyone realized just how great a grace this Sacrament is, the Confessionals would be full all the time. I wonder if cradle Catholics just don't realize what a great treasure they have here. As a convert, I see how precious it is that we Catholics have this Sacrament as well as the Eucharist. These Sacraments are just two of the things that Protestants don't have that I can't imagine living without now.

As for the religious sisters near you - they most likely have their Confessor come to them on a regular basis. In the religious communities that I have been in, a Confessor came every two weeks to hear Confession for all the nuns. I doubt the Confessor heard many mortal sins there, but nuns know the value of this Sacrament and every nun attended every time!

I edited this because I realize it might sound a little patronizing towards Protestants (or even cradle Catholics) and I didn't mean it that way. I just love this Sacrament so much and find such a great peace in regular Confession myself. I just wanted to stress what a great gift it is, and that it is often an undervalued Sacrament. No offence intended towards anyone.

Edited May 19, 2010 by nunsense

[fides' Jack]

[quote name='Nihil Obstat' date='18 May 2010 - 02:42 PM' timestamp='1274211737' post='2112966']
Well I'd be inclined to assume, just for the sake of charity, that the priests actually were unavailable and couldn't take appointments at the time.
[/quote]

Thank you for saying that. It needed to be said.

[fides' Jack]

[quote name='MithLuin' date='18 May 2010 - 03:40 PM' timestamp='1274215254' post='2113032']
People are always saying that it used to be that no one went to communion, but if they did, they always, always went to confession first (and confessing often was not unusual). Now, no one goes to confession ('once a year' is enough for some people ) but everyone goes to communion. I wish confession were offered a lot lot more. Like, before all masses, not just the one on Saturday. The two local diocese here declared that all churches would be open for confession on Wednesday evenings in Lent and had a big ad campaign to let people know (buses, subways, billboards). I really appreciated that!

I understand that with fewer priests per parish (and larger parishes) our priests' time is at a premium. Many of them are very very busy men who have many pastoral obligations to a lot of people. I know I can't expect them to drop what they are doing and take care of me. That wouldn't be fair.

But I don't like that confession is only available for one hour on Saturday afternoons at most parishes. It's very limited. It's great when parishes can offer more.
[/quote]

I agree, but I also think that Confession would be offered more if people actually went. If they have a Saturday afternoon schedule, and 3 people show up, it's not much incentive to have it more. At the same time, however, perhaps people would go more if they knew they could go anytime, or almost anytime.

[MissScripture]

[quote name='fides' Jack' date='18 May 2010 - 10:47 PM' timestamp='1274237224' post='2113374']
I agree, but I also think that Confession would be offered more if people actually went. If they have a Saturday afternoon schedule, and 3 people show up, it's not much incentive to have it more. At the same time, however, perhaps people would go more if they knew they could go anytime, or almost anytime.
[/quote]
It might also help if people knew what it was...It also depends on how the priest does it. Is his butt actually sitting in that confessional regardless of if there is a line of people out there or not? At my old parish, you would have to hunt the priest down, if there wasn't a line of people, and that turned a lot of people off to going (causing him to be in there less, causing fewer people to go, and it turned into a vicious cycle). For one thing, having to hunt down the priest kind of defeats the purpose of having a screen between you and the priest...

[fides quarens intellectum]

[quote name='MissScripture' date='18 May 2010 - 09:53 PM' timestamp='1274237608' post='2113380']
For one thing, having to hunt down the priest kind of defeats the purpose of having a screen between you and the priest...
[/quote]

you guys have screens?

[AccountDeleted]

[quote name='fides' Jack' date='19 May 2010 - 12:47 PM' timestamp='1274237224' post='2113374']
I agree, but I also think that Confession would be offered more if people actually went. If they have a Saturday afternoon schedule, and 3 people show up, it's not much incentive to have it more. At the same time, however, perhaps people would go more if they knew they could go anytime, or almost anytime.
[/quote]


Most of the Saturday afternoons I have been to have been full so perhaps it depends on the parish? In the city here, Confession is offered every day and there are always lines of people. It is done up the back of a very large Church and is also offered during some of the five or six Daily Masses (Novus Ordo). But this church is staffed by a religious community of priests so they can take turns doing the Masses and Confessions.

At the Latin Mass where I was attending until very recently, Confession was offered after every daily Mass during Exposition for half an hour, and also during the Sunday Masses - and there were always lines of people. These priests took turns as well.

I think we need more priests and we need to pray for this. They often have so much to do that it is hard for them to do everything. Our priests need us and we need them, more of them.

[MissScripture]

[quote name='fides quarens intellectum' date='18 May 2010 - 10:55 PM' timestamp='1274237754' post='2113381']
you guys have screens?
[/quote]
Yes? You have the option of either having one or not.

[fides' Jack]

[quote name='nunsense' date='18 May 2010 - 09:56 PM' timestamp='1274237792' post='2113383']
Most of the Saturday afternoons I have been to have been full so perhaps it depends on the parish? In the city here, Confession is offered every day and there are always lines of people. It is done up the back of a very large Church and is also offered during some of the five or six Daily Masses (Novus Ordo). But this church is staffed by a religious community of priests so they can take turns doing the Masses and Confessions.

At the Latin Mass where I was attending until very recently, Confession was offered after every daily Mass during Exposition for half an hour, and also during the Sunday Masses - and there were always lines of people. These priests took turns as well.

I think we need more priests and we need to pray for this. They often have so much to do that it is hard for them to do everything. Our priests need us and we need them, more of them.
[/quote]


That's wonderful. I guess it's not so bad in some places. There's a parish in Denver (Holy Ghost) that this reminded me of. They do Confessions before and during Mass Sunday mornings, and there are always lines of people there - and sometimes multiple priests simultaneously.

We do need more priests, and more good priests. We'll pray for that.

[BG45]

[quote name='IgnatiusofLoyola' date='18 May 2010 - 10:21 PM' timestamp='1274235677' post='2113332']
I do find the logistics of the Sacrament of Confession confusing. I just looked up the parish by my house to see when they have confession--exactly one hour a week, from 3:30-4:30 on Sat. Huh? How could that possibly be enough time?

The church is large--I'd say it holds 300-400 people. The parish has 6 Sunday obligation Masses--two on Sat evening, and four on Sunday. It also has two Masses a day during the week.

For the sake of argument, let's assume most of the parish doesn't go to Mass and only 600 people total attend Mass over the 6 Masses on Sat/Sun. How could one hour on Sat possibly be enough time for confession for even 600 people, let alone the actual attendance, which is probably at least double that (or they wouldn't have 6 Masses). The parish is large enough to support a full K-8 school, and I would suspect that most students who attend it are Catholic, since the public schools in our town are excellent--with an average of 20 kids per class and some of the highest test scores in the state.

Apparently the town I live in is so holy that no one ever commits mortal sin and needs to go to confession. Must be the water or something.

If other parishes have schedules like the parish near me, I'm surprised that even more people don't have problems getting their confessons heard.

BTW--The Sisters have their own retired priest who does their Masses (and I assume) their confessions, so I'm not counting them as regular parishoners of the local church. But, the parish does support them (and several of the Sisters teach at the parish school.) One thing I was impressed by in the parish is that they have a separate women's group whose only job is to make sure the Sisters have everything they need.
[/quote]

Do we live in the same town? If not, may I have that water?

Seriously though, our parish holds hundreds of people, and on a normal day there are maybe 12 of us there in the hour time frame from 3pm to 4pm. The exception being when I went the week before Easter and Fr. heard them for nearly three straight hours and almost started the Mass late because he was unwilling to turn anyone away. I really didn't mind that either, because it was heartening to see so many people actually cared.