Friends Possibly Becoming A Couple

[Slappo]

[quote name='Sacred Music Man' date='21 April 2010 - 09:26 PM' timestamp='1271910412' post='2097794']
Is it an acronym if it doesn't say a word? Like LASER is an acronym because you can say it
[/quote]

What... you can't pronounce words without vowels? Everyone else can

[Nihil Obstat]

[quote name='Sacred Music Man' date='21 April 2010 - 11:26 PM' timestamp='1271910412' post='2097794']
Is it an acronym if it doesn't say a word? Like LASER is an acronym because you can say it
[/quote]
Linguists would say yes. People will add vowels if necessary to be able to pronounce it, or in other cases, saying the letters themselves constitutes a new word. An example would be FYI, where we tend to say [[size="4"]əfwaɪaɪ[/size]]. We can, in this case, consider [[size="4"]əfwaɪaɪ[/size]] a word of its own.

Of course someone who like traditional rules of grammar would disagree, but that would be the linguists perspective.

Edited April 22, 2010 by Nihil Obstat

[jeffpugh]

[quote name='Nihil Obstat' date='22 April 2010 - 12:43 AM' timestamp='1271911432' post='2097814']
Linguists would say yes. People will add vowels if necessary to be able to pronounce it, or in other cases, saying the letters themselves constitutes a new word. An example would be FYI, where we tend to say [[size="4"]əfwaɪaɪ[/size]]. We can, in this case, consider [[size="4"]əfwaɪaɪ[/size]] a word of its own.

Of course someone who like traditional rules of grammar would disagree, but that would be the linguists perspective.
[/quote]
ac·ro·nym   [ak-ruh-nim] Show IPA
–noun
1.
a word formed from the initial letters or groups of letters of words in a set phrase or series of words, as Wac from Women's Army Corps, OPEC from Organization of Petroleum Exporting Countries, or loran from long-range navigation.

[Ash Wednesday]

From personal experience I've found that if a man doesn't get up the guts and nerve to ask you out, then he is not ready for a relationship. If they really have taken an interest in courting you, they ask you out.

I guess I'm personally just wary of passive men. I dated one very seriously, I made the moves, he was passive. He didn't object and was happy to have a girlfriend to keep him company which drew the relationship out a number of years, but he proved to be passive about the relationship and passive and weak of other areas in his life as well.

That is not to say you can't build a friendship, pray about it and let him know you are potentially interested but sooner or later I tend to think it's better if the guy does the official asking out.

[MissyP89]

ARGH IT ATE MY POST AGAINNNNN!

[jeffpugh]

[quote name='MissyP89' date='22 April 2010 - 11:07 AM' timestamp='1271948875' post='2098005']
ARGH IT ATE MY POST AGAINNNNN!
[/quote]


If you write an epic, be sure to copy-paste to a notepad first.

[Nihil Obstat]

[quote name='Sacred Music Man' date='22 April 2010 - 12:40 PM' timestamp='1271958025' post='2098086']


If you write an epic, be sure to copy-paste to a notepad first.
[/quote]
One time I came up with a sound deductive proof for the existence of God, but I forgot to copy it, and then my internet went down. I forgot what I had written afterwards.

[let_go_let_God]

Also don't fret if it does take a while. Cttc and I were friends for 5 years and then all of a sudden it clicked. If you just give it time and allow yourselves the friendship first, it might prove beautiful in the end.

God bless-
LGLG

[IgnatiusofLoyola]

[quote name='Ash Wednesday' date='22 April 2010 - 09:32 AM' timestamp='1271946728' post='2097989']
From personal experience I've found that if a man doesn't get up the guts and nerve to ask you out, then he is not ready for a relationship. If they really have taken an interest in courting you, they ask you out.

I guess I'm personally just wary of passive men. I dated one very seriously, I made the moves, he was passive. He didn't object and was happy to have a girlfriend to keep him company which drew the relationship out a number of years, but he proved to be passive about the relationship and passive and weak of other areas in his life as well.

That is not to say you can't build a friendship, pray about it and let him know you are potentially interested but sooner or later I tend to think it's better if the guy does the official asking out.
[/quote]

You've made an excellent point. My post referred mostly to the "original nudge," as a nice thing to do if the guy IS interested but doesn't want to be disrespectful of you or is afraid of making a fool out of himself.

But, I completely agree--if the passivity continues, that's a "red flag."

[tinytherese]

I've done praying and thinking about it and it just won't work, for right now at least. He loves me as a friend, but isn't looking to go beyond that. There are some other things that are issues as well (and not just what you mentioned MS and what I told you about in the PM I sent you.) I'm not sure what to do now, but I do know that it is hard when someone who has a lot of good traits that you're looking for in a spouse isn't interested.

[ardillacid]

[quote name='tinytherese' date='20 April 2010 - 05:40 PM' timestamp='1271799614' post='2096966']

I haven't felt insecure like this when it comes to a possible romantic relationship in a really long time. I've grown to just be the type who has believed that if he doesn't see how valuable you are and is too chicken to make a move then forget him. I definitely hold the traditional view that the woman is the valuable prize worth pursuing with dignity and the man is to pursue her, so it isn't as if I would just tell him how I feel. That would show just how insecure I am. I've left him some hints, but no offence to the men on here, but I definitely see why some women call men dense now. Most of the time he just ignores them. Heck, sometimes he doesn't even respond at all!
[/quote]
Karma

[missionseeker]

[quote name='tinytherese' date='22 April 2010 - 11:00 PM' timestamp='1271995217' post='2098385']
I've done praying and thinking about it and it just won't work, for right now at least. He loves me as a friend, but isn't looking to go beyond that. There are some other things that are issues as well (and not just what you mentioned MS and what I told you about in the PM I sent you.) I'm not sure what to do now, but I do know that it is hard when someone who has a lot of good traits that you're looking for in a spouse isn't interested.
[/quote]


Sorry I haven't responded. I have been thinking about it and all. But I have a ton of things going on and papers to write ect. But I promise that I will definitely give you an answer to the best of my ability.

~Cat

[Archaeology cat]

[quote name='tinytherese' date='23 April 2010 - 05:00 AM' timestamp='1271995217' post='2098385']
I've done praying and thinking about it and it just won't work, for right now at least. He loves me as a friend, but isn't looking to go beyond that. There are some other things that are issues as well (and not just what you mentioned MS and what I told you about in the PM I sent you.) I'm not sure what to do now, but I do know that it is hard when someone who has a lot of good traits that you're looking for in a spouse isn't interested.
[/quote]
As others said, it could be that he just isn't in the right place for that yet, but it doesn't mean that it won't happen. Concentrate on being good friends, and if it's God's will then it will develop into more in the right time frame. I realise the irony of me giving advice to be patient, as I'm the most impatient person ever. Which is perhaps why God made me wait a bit before my husband showed an interest in being more than friends. I'd liked him as more for a couple of years before we started dating. At one point I even thought that it would never happen and that I should just settle for another, but thankfully God disabused me of that that notion. And in looking back, I can see that I clearly wasn't ready for the relationship before we actually started dating. I didn't think that at the time when I was waiting, but I can see it now.

[Socrates]

If you've repeatedly dropped hints that you're open and interested, and he's given no response, being a guy, that means he's definitely not interested.
We males are primitive brutes that will happily take any perceived opportunity to find a mate if that's what we're interested in.
Don't waste time trying to woo him over, but look elsewhere. Continued striving to win him over on your part will not make you more attractive to him, but merely look desperate.

Edited April 23, 2010 by Socrates

[princessgianna]

[quote name='tinytherese' date='20 April 2010 - 04:40 PM' timestamp='1271799614' post='2096966']
I didn't expect it to happen, but I've grown attracted to a guy friend of mine. When I first met him considering I was still sort of discerning a vocation to the religious life and wasn't looking for a relationship. Time went on and over the past several months I discerned married life and don't think that religious life is for me afterall. (It wasn't as if he came into my life and I decided to throw away the idea of the habit. My decision had to do with plenty of other factors other than him.)

I don't know how he feels about me, other than I know that he respects me as a person. He's a solid Catholic, adores children, we share some similar interests, wants to be a father someday, and there are lots of other positive traits about him, so he has is a good candidate for courtship. It wouldn't be surprising if in the future we would begin courtship. There are just some things that concern me regarding my attraction for him. I know that this just might be me being my usual worrying self, but I'm noticing some negative things regarding our relationship. Spending time with him can be somewhat painful, because I don't know how he feels about me and I'd like us to be more than friends. I'm concerned that unless I get asked out by him that I'll just be waiting around, hanging on his every word wondering if he is going to ask me out already. It might not happen for all I know and I don't want to grow to become really insecure about it, as if there is something wrong with me that he's just not interested. (I've been experiencing this already. I've been trying to manage it, telling myself that maybe he just isn't interested, is undecided, or is just nervous to make a move, so if he doesn't have the guts to do it then do I really want to be with a wimp?)

I haven't felt insecure like this when it comes to a possible romantic relationship in a really long time. I've grown to just be the type who has believed that if he doesn't see how valuable you are and is too chicken to make a move then forget him. I definitely hold the traditional view that the woman is the valuable prize worth pursuing with dignity and the man is to pursue her, so it isn't as if I would just tell him how I feel. That would show just how insecure I am. I've left him some hints, but no offence to the men on here, but I definitely see why some women call men dense now. Most of the time he just ignores them. Heck, sometimes he doesn't even respond at all! I've just noticed that the fruit that has come from this has been me becoming more insecure, though perhaps I'm just being impatient with him. It's really getting to me and I'm not sure how to handle it.
[/quote]:starts singing:
POPULAR!
YOU'RE GONNA BE POPULAR!
I'LL TEACH YOU THE PROPER PLOYS
WHEN YOU TALK TO BOYS
LITTLE WAYS TO FLIRT AND FLOUNCE oh`...
:stops singing:


Sorry when I first read your post that immediately jumped into my head!

Be sure not to ruin your friendship because courtship didn't work out for you! One of my main concerns as I enter the stage of "relationships" and "courtships" is I don't want to ruin my friendship with guys just because courtship didn't work out for us now.

Though I could be totally over my head about this since I have never been in such a relationship....

Prayers for you as you discern God's calling for you!

Blessings
PG~