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Vocation To The Single Life


OraProMe

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southern california guy

[quote name='OraProMe' date='07 January 2010 - 08:11 PM' timestamp='1262920270' post='2032193']
^After reading your posts here and on FE I'd try to chill out a little. I'm sure girls would love you then :)
[/quote]

Yeah, my post was a little much.. I shortened it.

So you're on Fish Eaters too?

Edited by southern california guy
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[quote name='southern california guy' date='07 January 2010 - 09:55 PM' timestamp='1262919327' post='2032181']
I think that I'm living this vocation to the single life against my will! :annoyed: In fact I'll bet that some of you guys are too..

So... what we need to do is to match people up -- so that their new vocation can be a married one!

Here's a picture of me. :smokey:

[img]http://inlinethumb62.webshots.com/20861/2017356250066947068S500x500Q85.jpg[/img]

(Pretty appealing,huh! :cool: What do ya think? Do the fake tattoo's and wig make me look a little too sexy?)
[/quote]

Stick to pictures of yourself in hockey equipment, Rich.....

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[quote name='southern california guy' date='07 January 2010 - 10:55 PM' timestamp='1262919327' post='2032181']

(Pretty appealing,huh! :cool: What do ya think? Do the fake tattoo's and wig make me look a little too sexy?)
[/quote]


I am beginning to think you have not been properly socialized.

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southern california guy

[quote name='Lilllabettt' date='07 January 2010 - 09:13 PM' timestamp='1262924009' post='2032234']
I am beginning to think you have not been properly socialized.
[/quote]

So you don't think that the tattoo's will do it... :unsure:

Actually I wore them to work when I first got them. And the reaction was not good.. In fact the tattoo's and wig were part of a costume that I wore to a Halloween party, and got the same fearful reaction at the Halloween party -- until people found out that they were fake.

I got them from Vampfangs.com

http://www.vampfangs.com/SearchResults.asp?Search=tattoo+sleeve&Search.x=11&Search.y=18

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dominicansoul

[quote name='tinytherese' date='06 January 2010 - 05:58 PM' timestamp='1262818687' post='2031193']
From what I've been told, whether you're single, married, consecrated, or in the priesthood you'll have times of loneliness.
[/quote]
...there is an essential loneliness in all of us...it's a hunger that can only be filled by the Almighty God

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Laudate_Dominum

[quote name='southern california guy' date='07 January 2010 - 09:55 PM' timestamp='1262919327' post='2032181']
I think that I'm living this vocation to the single life against my will! :annoyed: In fact I'll bet that some of you guys are too..

So... what we need to do is to match people up -- so that their new vocation can be a married one!

Here's a picture of me. :smokey:

[img]http://inlinethumb62.webshots.com/20861/2017356250066947068S500x500Q85.jpg[/img]

(Pretty appealing,huh! :cool: What do ya think? Do the fake tattoo's and wig make me look a little too sexy?)
[/quote]

The tattoo's are win but the wig is too obvious imo. Cool fruit trees and such.

[IMG]http://i62.photobucket.com/albums/h119/NoonienSoong_2006/Lulz/1290573111734113101.jpg[/IMG]

The wig is fail, but that's just my opinion. But anyway, you look fine in ur avatar pic.

[spoiler][IMG]http://i62.photobucket.com/albums/h119/NoonienSoong_2006/Lulz/failtoycat.jpg[/IMG][/spoiler]

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[quote name='southern california guy' date='07 January 2010 - 07:55 PM' timestamp='1262919327' post='2032181']
I think that I'm living this vocation to the single life against my will! :annoyed: In fact I'll bet that some of you guys are too..

So... what we need to do is to match people up -- so that their new vocation can be a married one!

Here's a picture of me. :smokey:

[img]http://inlinethumb62.webshots.com/20861/2017356250066947068S500x500Q85.jpg[/img]

(Pretty appealing,huh! :cool: What do ya think? Do the fake tattoo's and wig make me look a little too sexy?)
[/quote]

I really don't want this to sound unkind... You're probably a very nice guy, but you seem really creepy and obsessive online... at least here. Like I said, I don't mean to be harsh... but I think you've got to go about this another way, so you don't come across so overwhelming.

While you were gone your thread about being in purgatory because you're single got bumped... and there was some good advice added to it... maybe you want to check it out?

:idontknow:

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[quote name='southern california guy' date='08 January 2010 - 01:05 AM' timestamp='1262927119' post='2032282']
So you don't think that the tattoo's will do it... :unsure:
[/quote]

No, I mean you haven't been properly socialized. I have a friend who has a social adjustment disorder. He didn't have a normal adolesence, and so he never had a chance to practice integrating sexuality into socially appropriate behavior. In this area he has a 6 year old's presence of mind mixed with the hormones of an adult. So he just says things out loud. Brings up sex in the wrong setting, with the wrong people. Doesn't observe boundaries of intimacy. Sexualizes a lot of stuff. Asks inappropriate questions. He's not scary or violent. Just inappropriate.

I second zunshyn. check out that old thread.

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The Bus Station

[quote name='Winchester' date='07 January 2010 - 08:46 PM' timestamp='1262915207' post='2032152']
I like monkeys, too.
[/quote]

I am laughing out loud.

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southern california guy

[quote name='Lilllabettt' date='08 January 2010 - 11:41 AM' timestamp='1262976105' post='2032548']
No, I mean you haven't been properly socialized. I have a friend who has a social adjustment disorder. He didn't have a normal adolesence, and so he never had a chance to practice integrating sexuality into socially appropriate behavior. In this area he has a 6 year old's presence of mind mixed with the hormones of an adult. So he just says things out loud. Brings up sex in the wrong setting, with the wrong people. Doesn't observe boundaries of intimacy. Sexualizes a lot of stuff. Asks inappropriate questions. He's not scary or violent. Just inappropriate.

I second zunshyn. check out that old thread.
[/quote]

I apologize to you guys for hijacking this thread. I would have said that I was just "messing around" with my post, but owwww.. after thinking about what Lilllabettt wrote and musing it over I confess that I see what she's talking about.. I suppose I was a little uncomfortable with people discussing a vocation to the single life. It almost seems Calvinistic to me.. I think that we choose our own vocation -- and that a variety of choices are acceptable to god. I don't think that he chooses for us. And I suppose that I sort of interrupted the conversation in the thread with my slighty "out there" post.. :unsure:

Writing this would have been a bit more socially acceptable than seeking attention and distracting the issue with my picture and post.. And I did it without thinking about what I was doing.. I guess that I do have a bit of a problem :weep: Ow well, I promise I'll consider my motives and the direction of the thread more carefully in the future. No wonder some of us are called to a single life vocation..

However I don't think that this sort of thing has ever sabotaged a relationship for me. The sorts of "conflicts" I've run into were issues like children. I wanted some, she didn't. Or at least she wanted to continue her job -- and do the daycare option rather than being a stay-home mom. And I can see her position. What if she were to quit her job, have kids, and then we got divorced. Or what if I lost my job. I've dated very successful women -- doctors, lawyers, police officers, teachers, High School Principals.

And I "broke up" with one girlfriend because she wanted to have sex with me and I wanted to wait until we were married. I felt that perhaps the biggest problem would come when we had kids and she had a different viewpoint on premarital sex than I did (She wasn't Catholic she was "Christian" but still I thought I'd put that example in).

It can be a challenge to find the "right" person. Someone you could see yourself happily married to.

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I didn't think that your post was creepy or involved being socially awkward. :mellow: I just thought that you had a sense of humor and were just being silly. :lol_roll:

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Just to pick up on the subject of this thread and earlier posts.

There is such a thing as a vocation to the single state - and a careful read of Lumen Gentium (Dogmatic Constitution of The Church - Pope Paul VI) http://www.vatican.va/archive/hist_councils/ii_vatican_council/documents/vat-ii_const_19641121_lumen-gentium_en.html will reveal this. I can dig out some quotations if anyone wants them.

Firstly, our Baptism is a vocation or call to holiness through the following of The Gospel as Catholics. Baptism (which is a command or precept of the Gospel, not a counsel)is a vocation and a call from God and not some 'accident of fate or upbringing'. Secondly, a vocation to live out the Baptismal call in a certain manner and within a Church structure is not a command of The Gospel, rather it is simply an invitation to live out one's Baptism in a certain manner within Church structure. Thirdly, "laity" is a clear structure of its own within The Church. And some there are that feel no call to the religious life or any structure within The Church, but do feel a call to remain single and for the sake of The Kingdom in some way or apostolate, way of life - and commit themselves to this in some way but not within Church structure other than the general term "laity" - and the term "laity" is not a term for 'those waiting to get a vocation' - 'the defualt position'. It is a structure within The Church with its own obligations and responsibilities. The Baptized Laity are the foundation of The Church in Christ on which all else is built.........(interestingly and as an aside "the stone which the builders reject has become the cornerstone"..."what good can come out of Nazareth".)

There are those who may have impediments to religious life etc. and perhaps have tried structures within The Church and found that they did not fit at all. This does not mean that they have no vocation, for Baptism is a vocation and "laity" is a structure within The Church. Is Baptism then a sort of "default" position. I dont think so for it is quite dismissive of Baptism I think and also a lack of understanding of Baptism and its intrinsic call and meaning. The great dignity of Baptism.

I am not speaking of the single state, where one is single simply because no marriage partner has come along, or one has not yet made up one's mind about religious life or the priesthood - one's vocation then is to live out one's Baptism until things clarify for obviously there is an attraction to marriage or to religious life or the priesthood, i.e. one feels that one may have a certain call, invitation or vocation to live out their Baptism in a certain manner within the structure of The Church flowing from and out of one's Baptism and lay status.

Rather than state "single state", The Church uses the term "celibate state" and obviously if one is in the single state one always has a call to celibacy no matter the reason for the single state i.e. chosen or accidental - a clear choice of a way and state of life and following of The Gospel, or a place of waiting, discerning. CHRISTIFIDELES LAICI (ON THE VOCATION AND THE MISSION
OF THE LAY FAITHFUL)
http://www.vatican.va/holy_father/john_paul_ii/apost_exhortations/documents/hf_jp-ii_exh_30121988_christifideles-laici_en.html :
"[u]The Various Vocations in the Lay State[/u]
…………………Along the same line the Second Vatican Council states: "This lay spirituality should take its particular character from the circumstances of one's state in life (married and familylife, celibacy, widowhood), from one's state of health and from one's professional and social activity. All should not cease to develop earnestly the qualities and talents bestowed on them in accord with these conditions of life and should make use of the gifts which they have received from the Holy Spirit"(208"


Barb

Edited by BarbaraTherese
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Quoting: 'southern california guy'
[quote] I think that we choose our own vocation -- and that a variety of choices are acceptable to god. I don't think that he chooses for us.[/quote] This is very true. The command or precept of The Gospel is to be Baptized and to holiness, to build on that Baptism in a particular manner, way of holiness, is an invitation only - nothing of command about it. I suppose it just may be ungrateful and hence unwise not to accept the invitation but invitation it remains. It does remain true that we choose our own vocation or way in life (while "all is Grace" St. Therese) - God does not choose for us by way of command, while He may invite and we either accept or refuse but we cannot refuse to grow in holiness flowing out of our Baptism which is a command. Perhaps one may find the going a bit rough if one refuses God's invitation, I would not know and tend towards that this is not necessarily so. "All things are possible to God".
A call to religious life is not recognized simply because it is what I want to do with my life. Generally speaking there are three signs that God is inviting to relgious life.

A general attraction to the life (personal)
The ability to live the life (objective)
Acceptance by a religious order (objective)

While The Holy Spirit may build on attraction (personal) He will guide by cirumstances (objective).

Barb

Edited by BarbaraTherese
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