English?

[hyperdulia again]

Fun With Malapropisms

"Oftentimes, we live in a processed world—you know, people focus on the process and not results."

—Bush, speaking on the Middle East peace process

Source: Public Papers of the Presidents, "Interview With Print Journalists," June 2, 2003

"It's important for [the United Nations'] words to mean what they say, and as we head into the 21st century, Mark, when it comes to our security, we really don't need anybody's permission."

—Bush, during a press conference in 2003 (in the 21st century)

Source: Federal Document Clearing House, "President George Bush Discusses Iraq in National Press Conference," March 6, 2003

"Columbia carried in its payroll classroom experiments from some of our students in America."

Source: The Washington Post, "With Edwards, White House Shows First-Strike Capability," Dana Milbank, Feb. 11, 2003

"Should any Iraqi officer or soldier receive an order from Saddam Hussein ... don't follow that order. Because if you choose to do so, when Iraq is liberated, you will be treated, tried and persecuted as a war criminal."

Source: Federal Document Clearing House, "Taking Action to Strengthen Small Business Remarks by the President on the Economy," Jan. 22, 2003

"The law I sign today directs new funds and new focus to the task of collecting vital intelligence on terrorist threats and on weapons of mass production."

Source: Federal Document Clearing House, "President Signs 911 Commission Bill," Nov. 27, 2002

"Corporate malfeance [sic] has had an effect on our economy and we need to do something about it."

Source: FDCH Political Transcripts, "George W. Bush Participates in Rally at Oakland County Airport," Oct. 14, 2002

"Speaking about barbaric regimes, we must deal with probably one of the most—not probably—one of the most real threats we face, and that is the idea of a barbaric regime teaming up with a terrorist network and providing weapons of mass destruction to hold the United States and our allies and our friends blackmail."

Source: FDCH Political Transcripts, "George W. Bush Participates in Alexander for Senate Luncheon," Sept. 17, 2002

Bush's Inner Wordsmith

"A free, peaceful Zimbabwe has got the capacity to deliver a lot of goods and services which are needed on this continent in order to help aleve suffering."

—Bush, making a plug for "Aleve" pain reliever in speaking about alleviating suffering in Africa

Source: The White House, "President Bush Discusses U.S.-Africa Partnership from South Africa, Press Availability with President Bush and President Mbeki of South Africa," July 9, 2003

"I used the expression 'ride herd.' I don't know if anybody understood the meaning. It's a little informal in diplomatic terms. I said, we're going to put a guy on the ground to ride herd on the process. See them all scratching their heads."

—Bush, realizing few people understand him when he speaks

Source: New York Times, "The President's Trip, In the President's Words: 'A Mutual Desire to Work Toward the Vision," June 5, 2003

"We've had a great weekend here in the land of the enchanted."

—Bush, referring to New Mexico, "The Land of Enchantment"

Source: Federal Document Clearinghouse, "George W. Bush Delivers Remarks on Jobs and Growth in Albuquerque," May 12, 2003

"These people don't have tanks. They don't have ships. They hide in caves. They send suiciders out."

Source: Federal News Service, "Remarks by President George W. Bush At Welcome Rally," Nov. 1, 2002

"A lame duck session, for people who don't know what that means, it means the Senate is coming and the House is coming back between now and Christmas and they've got a few days to get some big things done."

Source: FDCH Political Transcripts, "President Bush Holds Press Conference, Presidential Hall, Dwight D. Eisenhower Executive Office Building," Nov. 7, 2002

"We hold dear what our Declaration of Independence says, that all have got uninalienable rights, endowed by a Creator."

Source: The New York Times, "Reporter's Notebook; Skipping Borders, Tripping Diction," David E. Sanger, May 28, 2002

Grammar: Bush's Foe

"The other issue regarding health care is whether or not health care is affordable and available. And one reason it's not in certain communities is because there is (sic) too many lawsuits."

Source: White House, "President Discusses Tax Relief in Minnesota: Remarks by the President on the Economy," June 19, 2003

"The proposal we've proposed will save him nearly $2,400 every year."

—Bush, in another display of the depth and breadth of his language skills

Source: Federal Document Clearinghouse, "President Bush Speaks to the Tax Relief Coalition, U.S. Chamber of Commerce," May 6, 2003

"Maybe between the time I left Camp David and here I'll learn more."

—Bush, speaking to reporters after returning from Camp David

Source: Public Papers of the Presidents, "Remarks on Returning From Camp David, Maryland, and an Exchange with Reporters," March 23, 2003

"What is life choices about?"

—Bush, speaking to student athletes

Source: Federal Document Clearing House, "President Welcomes NCAA Champs," Feb. 24, 2003

"The more money they have in their more pockets — in their pockets, the more likely it is that somebody will find work."

Source: Federal Document Clearing House, "George W. Bush Delivers Remarks to the GOP Resort from the Greenbriar Resort," Feb. 9, 2003

"One year ago today, the time for excuse-making has come to an end."

Source: Federal News Service, "Remarks by President George W. Bush on Anniversary of No Child Left Behind Act," Jan. 8, 2003

"And out of the evil done to America is going to come a more peaceful world, and a more better America..."

Source: FDCH Political Transcripts, "George W. Bush Participates in Welcome Ceremony," Oct. 22, 2002

"Some communities, you say, "Hey, American dream," and they go, "What does that mean?"

Source: FDCH Political Transcripts, "George W. Bush Participates in Manchester, New Hampshire Welcome," Oct. 5, 2002

"There is no second-rate children in Arizona. There's no second-rate children in America."

Source: FDCH Political Transcripts, "George W. Bush Delivers Remarks at Salmon for Governor and Renzi for Congress Fund-raiser," Sept. 27, 2002

"What is your ambitions?"

—Bush, speaking at the Parkview Arts and Science Magnet School

Source: Federal News Service, "Remarks by President George W. Bush at a Back-to-School Event," Aug. 29, 2002

"We will be steadfast and strong in our desire to make the world more free."

Source: Federal News Service, "Remarks by President George W. Bush at 'Simon for Governor' Luncheon," Aug. 23, 2002

"When one of us suffer, all of us suffers."

—Bush, addressing the Pennsylvania coal miners

Source: The Nation, "W. and the Coal Miners: Photo-op Cover for Anti-worker Policies," David Corn, Aug. 6, 2002

"You teach a child to read, and he or her will be able to pass a literacy test."

Source: United Press International, "Bush Proposes Increase in Education Funds," Mark Kukis, Feb. 21, 2001

Foot-in-Mouth Disease Strikes Again

"I said you were a man of peace. I want you to know I took immense carp for that."

—Bush, speaking to Israeli Prime Minister Ariel Sharon

Source: Washington Post, "Bush Sticks to the Broad Strokes," Glenn Kessler, June 3, 2003

"I'm also not very analytical. You know I don't spend a lot of time thinking about myself, about why I do things."

—Bush, reassuring us that the wartime president of the most powerful nation on earth does not think too much

Source: Federal Document Clearing House, "Roundtable Interview of the President by White House Press Pool," June 4, 2003

"I've got very good relations with President Mubarak and Crown Prince Abdullah and the King of Jordan, Gulf Coast countries."

—Bush, confusing the Gulf Coast with the Persian Gulf

Source: Public Papers of the Presidents, "Interview With Print Journalists," June 2, 2003

"I am the master of low expectations."

Source: Agence France Presse, "Bush Says Middle East Summit 'Met Expectations'," June 4, 2003

"We ended the rule of one of history's worst tyrants, and in doing so we not only freed the American people, we made our own people more secure."

—Bush, on regime change in the United States

Source: Federal Document Clearinghouse, "President George W. Bush and Australian Prime Minister John Howard Hold Joint Media Availability," May 3, 2003

"It will take time to restore chaos and order—but we—order out of chaos."

—Bush, speaking to reporters about the situation in Iraq

Source: Federal Document Clearing House, "President George W. Bush Delivers Remarks Regarding POWS," April 13, 2003

"And, most importantly, Alma Powell, secretary of Colin Powell, is with us."

—Bush, introducing Alma Powell, wife of Secretary of State Colin Powell

Source: Federal News Service, "Remarks by President George W. Bush on First Anniversary of the USA Freedom Corps," Jan. 30, 2003

"The war on terror involves Saddam Hussein because of the nature of Saddam Hussein, the history of Saddam Hussein and his willingness to terrorize himself."

Source: The Washington Post, "With Edwards, White House Shows First-Strike Capability," Dana Milbank, Feb. 11, 2003

"The Iraqi regime is a threat to any American and to threats who are friends of America."

Source: Federal Document Clearing House, "President Rallies Troops at Fort Hood," Jan. 3, 2003

"They see the risks are high, the risk of being able to find a job or the risk of keeping the homeland secure."

Source: FDCH Political Transcripts, "President Bush Holds Press Conference, Presidential Hall, Dwight D. Eisenhower Executive Office Building," Nov. 7, 2002

"And I know something about being a government. And you've got a good one."

Source: FDCH Political Transcripts, "Remarks by the President at Arkansas Welcome, Northwest Arkansas Regional Airport," Nov. 4, 2002

"If you want to build a big project and you can't get insurance because of what the terrorists have done for America, you can put the project aside."

Source: FDCH Political Transcripts, "George W. Bush Participates in Rally at Oakland County Airport," Oct. 14, 2002

"I was proud the other day when both Republicans and Democrats stood with me in the Rose Garden to announce their support for a clear statement of purpose, "You disarm, or we will.'"

—Bush, speaking about Saddam Hussein

Source: FDCH Political Transcripts, "George W. Bush Delivers Remarks at a Sununu for Senate Fundraiser," Oct. 5, 2002

"If you find a neighbor in need, you're responsible for serving that neighbor in need, you're responsible for loving a neighbor just like you'd like to love yourself."

Source: FDCH Political Transcripts, "George W. Bush Delivers Remarks on the Economy," Sept. 16, 2002

"There's no doubt in my mind that we should allow the world worst leaders to hold America hostage, to threaten our peace, to threaten our friends and allies with the world's worst weapons."

Source: Federal Document Clearing House, "Remarks by the President at Chris Chocola for Congress, and Indiana Victory 2002 Finance Dinner," Sept. 5, 2002

"And when we find children trapped in schools which will not teach and will not change, as a society we must demand something better, because there is no second-rate children in America."

Source: Federal Document Clearing House, "Remarks by the President at Chris Chocola for Congress, and Indiana Victory 2002 Finance Dinner," Sept. 5, 2002

"There's no bigger task than protecting the homeland of our country."

Source: Federal News Service, "Remarks by President George W. Bush at 'Simon for Governor' Luncheon," Aug. 23, 2002

"But here in Texas we took [trial lawyers] on and got some good medical—medical malpractice, which evidently had a few loopholes in it."

Source: PR Newswire, "Remarks by the President at the Economic Forum Health Care Security Session," Aug. 13, 2002

"Tommy is a good listener, and he's a pretty good actor, too. He can get things done. Action man, we call him."

—Bush, referring to Health and Human Services Secretary Tommy Thompson Source: PR Newswire, "Remarks by the President at the Economic Forum Health Care Security Session," Aug. 13, 2002

"I promise you I will listen to what has been said here, even though I wasn't here."

Source: PR Newswire, "Remarks by the President at the Economic Forum Health Care Security Session," Aug. 13, 2002

"The consultation process is a positive part of really allowing people to fully understand our deep concerns about this man, his regime and his desires to have weapons of mass destruction. Last question—and then I've got to go chip and putt for a birdie. [Laughter.] It was a good drive."

—Bush, interrupting an Aug. 10 golf game in Waco, Texas, for a Q & A discussing possible U.S. military action against Iraq.

Source: The Washington Post, "White House Veteran to New Guy: Oh, Beha-aaa-ave!," Lloyd Grove, Aug. 13, 2002

"Do you have blacks, too?"

—Bush, speaking to Brazilian President Fernando Henrique Cardoso.

Source: Salon.com, "Bushed," Jake Tapper, June 20, 2002

"A dictatorship would be a heck of a lot easier, there's no question about it."

Source: Business Week Online, "A Gentleman's "C" for W," Richard S. Dunham, July 30, 2001

Barely Comprehensible and Funny

"By making the right choices, we can make the right choice for our future."

—Bush, sharing insights into improving Americans' health and fitness

Source: The White House, "President Bush Highlights Health and Fitness Initiative: Remarks by the President on Fitness," July 18, 2003

"In 2000, alone, obesity costs totaled the country an estimated cost of $117 billion."

—Bush, promoting his Health and Fitness Initiative

Source: The White House, "President Bush Highlights Health and Fitness Initiative: Remarks by the President on Fitness," July 18, 2003

"But we will bring the weapons and, of course—we will bring the information forward on the weapons when they find them. And that will end up—end all this speculation. I understand there has been a lot of speculation over in Great Britain, we've got a little bit of it here, about whether or not the—whether or not the actions were based upon valid information. We can debate that all day long, until the truth shows up."

—Bush, unwavering in his certainty that one way or another WMDs will appear in Iraq

Source: The White House, "President Bush, Prime Minister Blair Discuss War on Terrorism," July 17, 2003

"I had the opportunity to go out to Goree Island and talk about what slavery meant to America. It's very interesting when you think about it, the slaves who left here to go to America, because of their steadfast and their religion and their belief in freedom, helped change America. America is what it is today because of what went on in the past."

—Bush, commenting on the significance of slavery in America's past

Source: White House, "Remarks by the President to Embassy Personnel, Leopold Sedar Senghor International Airport, Dakar, Senegal," July 8, 2003

"And then we'll be going to Goree Island, where I'll be giving a speech about race, race in the world, race as it relates to Africa and America. And we're in the process of writing it. I can't give you any highlights of the speech yet because I, frankly, haven't seen it."

—Bush, discussing preparations for his trip to Africa

Source: White House, "President Bush Discusses Upcoming Africa Trip with Reporters Remarks by the President in Roundtable Interview with African Print Journalists," July 3, 2003

"We are in the process of helping them implement a strategy which is was described to us in Aqaba as to how the Palestinian Authority want to reconstitute a security force in order to make sure the terrorists, the haters of peace, those who can't stand freedom do not have their way in the Middle East."

—Bush, on smoothing some of the bumps in the road to peace in the Middle East

Source: The White House, "President Believes Peace in Middle East is Achievable: Remarks by the President to the Travel Pool," June 15, 2003

"I think that freedom is a powerful incentive. And I am—I believe that someday freedom will prevail everywhere, because freedom is a powerful drive for people to—and it's the beginnings of people expressing themselves toward a free Iran, which I think is positive."

—Bush, on recent protests in Iran

Source: The White House, "President Believes Peace in Middle East is Achievable: Remarks by the President to the Travel Pool," June 15, 2003

"Wait for us to succeed peace. Wait for us to have two states, side by side—is for everybody coming together to deny the killers the opportunity to destroy."

—Bush, speaking to reporters

Source: The White House, "President Believes Peace in Middle East is Achievable: Remarks by the President to the Travel Pool," June 15, 2003

"And if one of those jobs are created, we must have a system which trains people for the jobs which actually exist."

—Bush, discussing employment training

Source: U.S. Newswire, "Remarks by the President on Employment Training," June 17, 2003

"First, let me make it very clear, poor people aren't necessarily killers. Just because you happen to be not rich doesn't mean you're willing to kill."

—Bush, speaking about terrorism and poverty

Source: Public Papers of the Presidents, "The President's News Conference With President Macapagal-Arroyo of the Philippines," May 26, 2003

"Some one of my visits—one of the reasons I'm visiting here is to ask the question, you know, to people, because if there's moving too slow or people are saying one thing and the other thing is not happening, now's the time to find out."

—Bush, talking about hurricane relief

Source: Federal Document Clearing House, "George W. Bush Delivers Remarks on Tornado Damage," May 13, 2003

"We can help somebody who hurts by hugging a neighbor in need."

Source: Federal News Service, "Remarks by President George W. Bush To Marine Personnel and Their Families," April 3, 2003

"And as I said in my State of the Union, the idea is to see that a car born today—I mean, a child born today will be driving a car, as his or her first car, which will be powered by hydrogen and pollution-free."

Source: Federal News Service, "Remarks by President George W. Bush Re: Energy Independence," Feb. 6, 2003

"There was a good news story in Mississippi. I went down there and—it wasn't because of me, it was because the doctors and the citizens understand the cost of a trial system gone array and they got themselves a law."

Source: Federal Document Clearing House, "President Calls for Medical Liability Reform," Jan. 16, 2003

"I mentioned early on that I recognize there are hurdles, and we're going to achieve those hurdles."

Source: Federal News Service, "Remarks by President George W. Bush," Jan. 22, 2003

"There's only one person who hugs the mothers and the widows, the wives and the kids upon the death of their loved one. Others hug but having committed the troops, I've got an additional responsibility to hug and that's me and I know what it's like."

Source: ABC News Transcripts, "President Bush and First Lady Bush '20/20' Year-End Interview," Dec. 13, 2002

"The goals for this country are peace in the world. And the goals for this country are a compassionate American for every single citizen. That compassion is found in the hearts and souls of the American citizens."

Source: Federal Document Clearing House, "President Visits D.C. Food Bank," Dec. 19, 2002

"Sometimes Washington is one of these towns where the people who think they've got the sharp elbows are the most effective person."

Source: Federal Document Clearing House, "George W. Bush Participates in a Terrell-for-Senate Luncheon," Dec. 3, 2002

"The solid truth of the matter is, when you find—if you want to help heal the hurt, if you want to you hurt people—help people in pain, the best way to do so is to call upon the great strength of the country, which is the compassion of our fellow Americans."

Source: FDCH Political Transcripts, "George W. Bush Delivers Remarks," Nov. 4, 2002

"I want the youngsters here to remember the story of Flight 93, one of most profound parts of this entire history of the recent history we've been through."

Source: Federal News Service, "President Bush Remarks at Missouri Welcome," Nov. 4, 2002

"This is a—this is a—any strike's a tough—tough situation, but this one happens to come at a—or a lockout is a tough situation, or no work is a tough situation—is to come at bad time."

Source: Federal News Service, "Remarks by President Bush Following Meeting with Congressional Leaders to Discuss Terrorism Insurance," Oct. 1, 2002

"There's an old saying in Tennessee—I know it's in Texas, probably in Tennessee—that says: Fool me once, shame on [pause] shame on you. [Pause] Fool me [long, uncomfortable, agonizing pause] you can't get fooled again."

Source: The Washington Post, "The Reliable Source," Lloyd Grove, Sept. 18, 2002

"We're going to have a White House forum there in Washington, D.C., obviously—that's where the White House is ..."

Source: FDCH Political Transcripts, "George W. Bush Participates in Pledge Across America," Sept. 17, 2002

"I should have clarified it by my statement. I just clarified it by my—not should have—I just."

—Bush, trying to clarify a statement

Source: FDCH Political Transcripts, "George W. Bush Holds Media Availability with Italian Prime Minister Silvio Berlusconi," Sept. 14, 2002

"We've got pockets of persistent poverty in our society, which I refuse to declare defeat—I mean, I refuse to allow them to continue on. And so one of the things that we're trying to do is to encourage a faith-based initiative to spread its wings all across America, to be able to capture this great compassionate spirit."

Source: Federal News Service, "Remarks by President George W. Bush Re: Small Businesses Location," March 18, 2002

A Final Note

The second edition of the Oxford Dictionary of Phrase, Saying and Quotation recently recognized Bush's er ... contributions to the English language. Under the heading "Bushisms," the dictionary includes such Bush classics as, "We are ready for any unforseen event which may or may not happen."

Source: The Associated Press, "Words of wisdom from Bush—and you can quote him on that," Nov. 18, 2002

[Jake Huether]

I don't know.

It is either Bush... Or his writer... Or does Bush write his own stuff.

I don't know. I thought it was funny to an extent. But I see myself there. I'm horrible at English - but it doesn't mean I can't communicate, or do my job.

[hyperdulia again]

I don't think it means much, but I enjoy belittling him ;)

[Adam]

yah but either way Bush ownz ;)

[littleflower+JMJ]

nobody's perfect but those are funny :D

[nippy316]

www.dubyaspeak.com

nuff said

[nippy316]

"Rarely is the question asked: is our children learning?"

George dubya Bush

[three-n-one]

hey....I'm from Texas and thats how we all speak!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I really dont appreciate y'all (yah so I said y'all) belittling people, would you want people to do that to you? Wow by the way that is really Christ-like!!!

[Carrie]

Breathe three-in-one. It was just meant to be amusing. I'm sure even Jesus had a sense of humor.

Hyper, that made me laugh. Thanks for posting it.

[nippy316]

hey....I'm from Texas and thats how we all speak!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  I really dont appreciate y'all (yah so I said y'all) belittling people, would you want people to do that to you?  Wow by the way that is really Christ-like!!!

Are you saying that nobody in Texas uses correct grammar and knows how to construct an intelligent sentence?

Which reminds me of another favorite:

"There's no second-rate children in Arizona. There's no second-rate children in America."

-George dubya Bush

I'm amused by the grammar, not the accent.

[Norseman82]

Also there are his constant "Gone with the Wind" references with all the talk of the war on "Tara".....

"It will take time to restore chaos and order—but we—order out of chaos."

Reminds me of the first Mayor Daley who said "The police are not here to prevent disorder they are here to preserve it...."

[hyperdulia again]

haha "liberation, democracy, freedom"

[Hermione]

He should just hire Jerry Bruckheimer next time...

[nikkan_hanil]

yah but either way Bush ownz

Yah, he's aiight...I guess... <_<

[IcePrincessKRS]

Those are hysterical.

I love that man.

Our faults are half of what makes us so loveable sometimes.